Lady Myrkr

I'm not sure if this is one of those icky temporary breakups or not, but I broke up with my fiance of two years tonight.

There were a lot of reasons for it (he never called me his fiance even though he proposed to me, he's 22 and doesn't want to move out of his parents house, he doesn't know where he's heading in life, etc.). I really did and kind of do love him, but I've known him since I was ten (18 now) and he isn't trying to change who he is. He had been eager to point out my faults, all were things I was working on to get better with.

I had felt extremely lonely while dating him, but now I feel even more lonely. I had been accepted by his family, and being that my family consists of me and my stepdad, this was a pretty big thing...

Now I feel like I've lost all my contacts, and feel really lonely.

What can I do to beat the loneliness? My friend suggested I get a puppy. Anything else?

I have been off Zyprexa for about 5 days after being on it for a month. The reason for this is that my medication is having trouble coming in via the mail.

What I've noticed now that my Zyprexa isn't here is that instead of being emotionless while on the meds, I feel really anxious, scared, and depressed.

My hallucinations are back, which didn't surprise me. Doesn't make them any more pleasant to see and hear, though.

My head feels light, but I have trouble keeping it straight -- it keeps tilting. And when it tilts to the left, sometimes I find myself just staring forward at nothing in particular, not thinking or moving for a good 15 to 20 minutes, which creeps the *beep* out of me.

Also, I've been very twitchy and shaky. I can't hold anything steadily.

Plus, I'm an insomniac (again). I can't sleep. Working on 14 hours without sleep, might end up being more.

Are these withdrawal symptoms? If I didn't mention it happening before, it means that these things didn't happen while I was on the meds or before the meds. In other words, they're new symptoms. Whether they're my "disease" (my MD thinks I may be Schizophrenic or Schizotypal) or medication withdrawal, I'm not sure. What do you think?

How can I deal with these unruly, annoying symptoms?

This thought passed through my mind recently. You net folk probably don't care and'll give me a list of "Find God, he'll help you!", but I may be schizophrenic. My med doctor thinks I am.

I find myself having a little bit of trouble with religion now. I (kind of) am a Pagan these days, but because of the vivid hallucinations I've been having, I...

I can't even phrase it correctly. Part of me thinks most of the things I've experienced are just hallucinations. Another part of me thinks it doesn't matter if they were hallucinations or not, what matters is what I learned or got from the experience.

Your thoughts?

This thought passed through my mind recently. You net folk probably don't care and'll give me a list of "Find God, he'll help you!", but I may be schizophrenic. My med doctor thinks I am.

I find myself having a little bit of trouble with religion now. I (kind of) am a Pagan these days, but because of the vivid hallucinations I've been having, I...

I can't even phrase it correctly. Part of me thinks most of the things I've experienced are just hallucinations. Another part of me thinks it doesn't matter if they were hallucinations or not, what matters is what I learned or got from the experience.

Your thoughts?

Okay. So. I have this column of information that is in money format. What I want to do is divide one cell by another, put it into percentage format, and then round it to the nearest whole percent. So like...

Cell A1: $2.29

Cell C1: $204.60

I want to take information like that, divide it (2.29/204.60 = 0.01119), put it into percentage format (1.119%) and round it to the nearest percent (1%).

I know what I want to do, but I don't know how to do it. Could anyone help me figure this out? Thank you for your help ahead of time!

He mentioned Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, and "nonbelievers". Why did he leave out Pagans and atheists, two of his largest support groups?

No, Pagans are not "nonbelievers". And while atheists technically are "nonbelievers", it sounds almost spiteful to use that as a reference for them.

Is anyone else miffed he left those two out? While one may argue that it'd take a while to go through all the religions, those two are very large (non)religious groups in America.

PS: This thread isn't to argue that Pagans are nonbelievers. It's to argue about why Obama forgot atheists and Pagans.

He mentioned Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, and "nonbelievers". Why did he leave out Pagans and atheists, two of his largest support groups?

No, Pagans are not "nonbelievers". And while atheists technically are "nonbelievers", it sounds almost spiteful to use that as a reference for them.

Is anyone else miffed he left those two out? While one may argue that it'd take a while to go through all the religions, those two are very large (non)religious groups in America.

PS: This thread isn't to argue that Pagans are nonbelievers. It's to argue about why Obama forgot atheists and Pagans.

I've been feeling really lonely lately.

I don't have a job (trust me, I've looked!), and I go to online college. I live with my stepdad, and he doesn't come home until 6 PM. My niece and nephew used to live here and I used to play with them and cuddle with them, but they left with their father and their father won't let me or my stepdad see them anymore. My stepdad won't let me get a pet, and there's no volunteer jobs open in my neighborhood.

I'm 18 years old turning 19, live in NYC, have no work experience, and would like to stop feeling so lonely. Help is appreciated. Thank you.

Simplify the expression...

2ab^4 - 3a^2b^2 - ab^4 + a^2b^2

I know it's one of the following because it's a MC question:

A. 0

B. ab^4 - 2a^2b^2

C. 2a^2b^8 - 3a^4b^4

D. a^2b^8 - a^2b^8 - 2a^4b^4

If an explanation could be provided so I can do these on my own in the future, I'd be extremely grateful. Thank you!

I'm having auditory, visual, and even touch hallucinations, and I'm kind of scared.

Voices are telling me there are bugs everywhere and that people are coming for me, and when I went into my room, I saw a big shadowy dog bite my hand, and I was gushing blood all over the place, but after a bit of staring and blinking, there was no dog, and my hand was perfectly fine, even though I felt the pain and felt like I was gushing blood. I felt fine after, too.

The fact that I'm hallucinating is scaring me. I'm on Zyprexa 2.5 mg a day, but I've noticed that as my medicine batch continues (I'm like 15 days in) the less it works. My MD put me on it since he thinks I'm schizophrenic (which is scary enough!)

My stepdad is in the other room and I'm really scared and part of me wants to wake him up, but the other part of me wants me to just let him sleep. I'm really scared even though I know my hallucinations are hallucinations.

I know I should go to a psychiatrist, but I'm too scared to go outside alone and feel really nervous when on the phone to the point my hands shake and my teeth chatter.

Any ideas on what I should do?

I think it'd be more beautiful if I knew what was being said.

Cristina Donà - Universo

Parlami dell'universo

di un codice stellare che morire non può

di anime in continuo mutamento

e abbracci nucleari estesi nell'immensità

dove tu mi stai aspettando adesso...

...dentro una vertigine che danza

e ci porta al di là del tempo

sino a ritornare sulle labbra

l'incanto è lo stesso

perchè niente è cambiato

anche se tutto è diverso.

Cantami dell'universo

di un codice stellare che mentire non può

cadono nel vuoto in un momento

miliardi di segnali

che accendono l'immensità

dove tu lo sai che poi mi perdo...

...dentro a una vertigine che danza

e ci porta al di là del tempo

fino a ritornare sulle labbra

l'incanto è lo stesso

perchè niente è cambiato

anche se tutto è diverso...

perchè niente è cambiato

anche se tutto sembra diverso...

miliardi di segnali che accendono l'immensità....

...dentro a una vertigine che danza

e ci porta al di là del tempo

fino a ritornare sulle labbra

l'incanto è lo stesso

e tu sei...

...dentro a una vertigine che danza

e ci porta al di là del tempo

...dentro a una vertigine che danza

e ci porta al di là del tempo...

I tried sending them the EXE file, but it didn't work. Sent them the DEBUG folder with the exe, pdb, and ilk file, didn't work. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong here, but it's hard to show off you can code when you can't even get it to open on their computer!

No runtime or debug errors. Made in Microsoft Visual Studio 2008.

My doctor thinks I may be schizophrenic, and judging from my symptoms, paranoid schizophrenic. I don't know what an episode is, or if I've had one before.

Some of you may so "if you have one, you'll know it", but I... forgot what I was going to type.

Anyway. Answer, please?

Okay. It's made of cornstarch, talc, sodium bicarbonate, and "fragrance".

Where does it NOT go, and should I wait until I'm dry to put it on? (Yes, I'm a noob with this stuff)

Thanks!

I will start off by saying I don't eat too healthily, I don't drink 64 fl oz of water a day, I don't take my multivitamin every day, and for a good while now every day I've spent about 12 hours in front of a computer. If you plan to blame my symptoms on these, you should have a good reason for how they're causing it.

SYMPTOMS

1. Head ache by my temples, forehead, and the back of my neck/head.

2. Paranoia that's getting worse. I was scared to be around others before, but now I'm starting to be afraid of going outside.

3. Forgetfulness. I'll say something and forget it two minutes later.

4. Mind... blankness? Having trouble thinking and formulating words.

5. Trouble sleeping. My sleep schedule's all out of whack.

6. Hair pulling. Not other people. I've started pulling out my hair strand by strand. It's very hard to stop, and I'm yanking mainly by my part.

7. Apathy. I'm having trouble feeling, emotionally. However, I find myself crying randomly at times.

8. Hallucinations out of the corner of my eye of something dark moving past, or mice, or bugs, that I know really aren't there.

9. Hallucinations that sound like someone's moving things around... but only me and my stepdad live here, and it's not coming from his room.

10. Random muscle spasms every few hours where my body will just randomly shake for a second. Happens two to three times a half hour if I'm trying to go to sleep.

Is it my brain, or what?

I know it can't be bought, but, a lot of people have told me I lack self confidence or a semblance of an ego. People also tell me I rely too much on other people's opinions.

Yes, this question is highly ironic. Anyone know a good way to get some self confidence?

These pictures are from this past August.

http://megami-of-nekro.deviantart.com/art/Gabriell... <~~ My Face

http://megami-of-nekro.deviantart.com/art/Phail-94... <~~ Side View of my body.

Clothes, hair, make up suggestions?

For those who may be curious: 5'7'' - 5'9'', 180 pounds, 1/2 Russian, 1/2 Vietnamese, age 18, turning 19.

Okay, so, I'm going to list some information, and hopefully you friendly people can help me figure out what I need to fix and how to do it!

- I'm 18 years old, turning 19 in April.

- I'm between 5'7'' and 5'9'' (depending on the measuring tape/stick).

- I weigh 180 pounds.

- I have big hips.

- I have big thighs.

- I have a big bottom.

- I'm about a 36C.

- I have (a lot of) acne.

- I have oily skin everywhere except my legs and feet.

- My hair is dark brown.

- My hair is mid-back length.

- My hair refuses to conform to being straight or wavy, and decides to be somewhere in between.

- My hair gets oily after a day or so.

- I have a heart/oval shaped face.

- My feet are a size 10 1/2 mens (US sizes).

- I drink maybe 32 ounces of liquid (NOT water!) a day.

- I eat 2 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day.

- Sometimes I do not eat breakfast.

- I do not always have my multivitamin. (Healthy Sense Daily Mulipte with Iron)

- I usually do not have vegetables with dinner.

- I either have 3 - 5 chocolate cookies a day or a bowl of icecream.

- I do not exercise. (Poor blood circulation makes me get winded with certain exercises)

- I have an ulcer.

- I cannot eat most seafood, save white fish.

- I cannot eat any form of melon, due to allergies.

- I will not eat peas or stringbeans. No amount of money or promise will make those two foods go into my diet.

What do I need to change, or add on, or take away, in order to look and feel prettier?

Suggestions for clothes and hairstyles are allowed and appreciated.

I'm extremely grateful to all help and advice given.

I'm on the fourth floor and need to get to the sixth floor.

I got onto the elevator, and the doors close. It has those buttons that light up when you touch them.

I hit the fifth floor button on accident, so I hit the sixth right after. Then the buttons that were lit up showing what floors are next went off, and the button for 1 (first floor) lit up.

But the Elevator went up to the sixth floor. The doors were closed, but I could still see out of them, and I couldn't get out of the elevator.

I wasn't panicking or scared, but I couldn't get out. If anything, I felt rushed, like I needed to do something.