Falindris1

This is a personal description of my experience outside of time... (If you catch my drift trying to be discreet)... Care to share your own? Anyone else been there? I know I'm not alone ;D

With pupils dilated red and so sincere

A sudden loss of time was gripping me in fear

Paralyzed I lay, my head clouded in hell

Salvation I did pray, but for the end to come as well

My reflection betrayed me- I am not what I see

My choices failed me and all that I should be

Time is our prison, and egos our tombs

Living life misguided will surely end in doom

Introspection is something that all must experience

to understand how people live life so delirious

With this thought I felt all the weight disappear

No longer trapped in hell impaled upon a spear

I saw the beauty of the world and felt it in my heart

My friends were there for me right from the start

There was nothing left to do but to enjoy the cool moonlight

and wait to see my family for the ones we love we enlight

What I'm tryin' to say is that the world is very scary

and the experiences we share - you know they vary

since the age of man, it's been the same

a complete apathy to universal pain

When can we grow and be as one?

A dawn of a day with a golden sun

These are the dreams in which I believe

A new age without our brothers in the streets

So let's end the wars, end our shame

turn the negatives to positives for our gain

No as a country but as a world

this weight placed on every little boy and girl

Let's feed the hungry

Clothe the needy

Give for once!

There's no need to be greedy

We must

Open our hearts to

Expand our minds and

Forgive our sins

before we die

For the future's an illusion

and the past a lie

It takes but a desire

to stop and ask "why?"

Wrote this after I found out my girlfriend cheated, lots of history behind it just thought I would clear that up. Please focus on the writing more than the content if possible!

Quiet contemplation of a simple situation

can avoid the shattering of hearts

and the explosion of worlds

think twice before you hurt the girl

It is easier to quit and forget

than face challenge as a man

learn from your mistakes and she will turn to hate

never repeat those sins again

The tables have been turned and the love for which you yearn

has been taken abreast by another for a night

You try to fight the urge that this is what's deserved

and end up in a hopeless plight

I love you with everything, take my word

and you can't imagine how much it hurt

yet forgiveness is part of my folly

For I love you dear and I face eternal fear

for trust is easier destroyed than built

The day we first met we hardly could have bet

that we would end up here today

I love you,

yes it is true the very first time our eyes met

I became an unstoppable force tearing down your walls

making every good decision, every right call

and earning your trust and creating love

all the signs pointed to a match from above

In a day I destroyed her heart and shattered her world

in an act unfamiliar to me, my judgment had failed me

foolishness prevailed me and my sadness was never to be seen

I love you with everything, take my word

and you can't imagine how much it hurt

yet forgiveness is part of my folly

For I love you dear and I face eternal fear

for a trust is easier destroyed than built

Do we know where we go when we die?

I ask myself this in quiet contemplation

To die and experience nothing and to realize the lies

Would be tragic, living life with indoctrination

When we go, do we face a fable

a euphoria universal, no pain! No hunger!

No harm or hate, utopia, a wonder

An amazing dream obtainable impossible

Yet millions die every year from hunger

Thousands per minute existing no longer

Materialistically deceased, riddled with disease

All this pain inside can't be put to ease

Hope for change, salvation from shame

Can't you see, understand the game?

Kill in the lords name!

Kill in the lord's name?

This has been a work that I have re-discovered that was in my book of writing. Here goes ~

HYPOCRISY is something that’s not hard to see

You can command a man-- to part the seas

Yet you cannot prove your existence to me

Why should I follow you, be another sheep?

You send your prophets down to the earth

Men shall kill men just to prove their worth

Let’s see whose is bigger, who has got the girth

I pull you through the dirt, holding onto your shirt

Salvation and Damnation are just the same feat

creating a false sense of security

You think you can hide the mask

but it’s staring at you, you laugh

Ironic how it is to be so holy

but you know that it’s just a show

wave your wand, create a miracle

more like a fable, a myth, you’re so empirical

sadly it’s just predictable, you're infallible so sensational

the world may as well just explode, would you even know?

The walls come crashing down

The truth of your charade

Sinners walk among

us cheering at the parade

its all so clear now,

your presence not evident

seeking Salvation not for the sake of Salvation

will bring Damnation to your race of men.

Critique please :)

"What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering?"

Living in a world where death, murder, and rape are nothing if they don't directly involve us! We should be ashamed, not as a targeted individual, but as a world society and human race! How can we as a generation change this? How can we prevent the growth of a population desensitized to the pain and suffering of our fellow man?

First one, well no title as it isn't too developed! :)

We live in a cursed world

Inequalities plague our ranks

Our economy rises and falls, caught within the whirl

The dependency upon our government, other governments and their banks

Eliminate the poor, they're a scourge upon our land

To wish death upon them, take the life of man

The rich, much too rich, exterminate as well

A middle class, equality for all, must exist to erase this hell

#2

As the knife enters, the adrenaline rush

I twist the blade, your blood starts to gush

Down my arms your blood flows red

I grin relieved, you're finally dead

Made that one for a different topic but didn't pursue much more after

#3

We have become an endangered species

Independent in thought, yet completely spacious

Lost generations cry out for vengeance

Which only fuels cause for more men's deaths

The world as we know it has become a ruin

Economies, Empires, theres nothing left to them

A global landscape of gross degeneration

Leaves responsibility to the planet for regeneration -- Salvation

a rise of a peaceful organization of global nations

All I have for now let me know your opinions or suggestions, I'm open to constructive criticism so have at me!

I've got the solution to your problems

Of course this isn't free, all I ask for is a small fee

I will teach you to teach yourself, after all I came here to help

I hold the key to salvation, will you follow me?

If I am a martyr, what makes me better than those

on the television daily who claim the lives of many?

Is it because I can claim something without proof except

false miracles that occur to a special, chosen few

who have been in on the charade all along?

Father into your hands I commend my spirit

Yet in the till your change must go, for you must

live among dirty gutters and grimy shades

In order for your debt to the lord be paid

Ehh, this is what I've been able to rack around in my head so far. Not trying for any specific rhyme scheme or form. Tell me your thoughts on the writing so far!

Comment however you like!

Genocide is the cure

to the world’s problems and fears

kill the weak, enslave the stupid

useless men condemned to our uses

Increasing population there must be a change

killing and sterilizing are part of the game

the Elite shall stand strong one and the same

in this game of chess, we’ve reached the endgame

The pawns will rise, just to be crushed

the might of the Back Ranks remains untouched

A note to the reader a coffin awaits you

‘lest you be of height 6’2”

And in weight of 160 pounds

the logic behind our deaths, will surely be unsound

yet we will not know when we shall face demise

unless the complacent sheep open their eyes

Unite!

Fight!

Orwellian control shall not occur, stand as man

above such influence, and demand

our rights be protected and not wagered

to place ourselves out of genocide’s favor.

Let me know what you think!

Coward?

Am I a coward to refuse?

The constant misuse

Of the pretexts conducted

Serving justice obstructed

Giving the right to end life

Is not a responsibility for those without light

To illuminate the darkened, muddled truth

In which they’re pawns for their use

So No sir Uncle Sam I’m sorry

But my mind cannot be worried

For if I am a coward to refuse

I am a coward you cannot use

Extracting File

Time remaining 1.00s

Download Complete,

Finished? Run program?

Your life’s in order.

Your computer,

Your body suffers no disorder

Yet Alas!

What is this?

It is a virus,

Not typhoid or syphilis

It is your love

You’re an injection

Of Infection into my life

But it is an infection

I see as delight

My heart is a hard drive

My brain a CPU

But out of all the viruses in the world

I’m glad I have you!

Couldn't name it!

Men must go to fight

For romantic reasons, not human rights

Take your orders, without question

You wonder why you won’t get into heaven.

Kill the weak, slaughter the mothers

Take out your hostility you can’t release into others

Your heart is racing, exhilarating peace

You bathe in the blood of those you’ve released.

Uncle Sam wants-- you --, for your services,

To kill for -- his-- imperial purposes.

Ironic in the country of the free

To have a populous as blind as sheep

Build more weaponry, it’s a race that’s heavenly

Ignore the devil’s grin

Your hypocrisy in your democracy

Is your immoral sin

Down the streets, walking cadavers

To be mindless is such a tragic endeavor

Look at yourself as a whole.

Realize their puppet show.

I wake up, safe in my bed

My eyes wide, thoughts rushing to my head

To look in the mirror, see the future

And, to myself, become an abstract creature.

Critique away. No offense to those soldiers serving for our country. I am thankful for the sacrifice you have made for those of us at home.

This is just my take on the hypocrisy of the US Government, and their pretexts for wars.

Extracting File

Time remaining 1.00s

Download Complete,

Finished? Run program?

Your life’s in order.

Your computer,

Your body suffers no disorder

Yet Alas!

What is this?

It is a virus,

Not typhoid or syphilis

It is your love

You’re an injection

Of Infection into my life

But it is an infection

I see as delight

My heart is a hard drive

My brain a CPU

But out of all the viruses in the world

I’m glad I have you!

I wrote it in 3 minutes, I'm trying to hone my skills and my ability to write by timing myself and setting more challenges. Let me know if you like it!

The idea struck me, as I was trying to be recruited by a fellow senior this year into the military. I've learned the history books from cover to cover and know of the lies the country has used to coax the nation into not seeing the atrocities the US has committed. I know that I would be a hypocrite to support a nation that leaves its people in the dark on such important subjects. I also know that I am thankful to live in a country where I can express my doubts on the government without the fear of death. I am thankful for every soldier that has and is fighting in .. well now Afghanistan, and understand that the men who have been responsible for the horrors of the US were not the men following orders. Please offer any supportive ideas, or constructive criticism.

Coward?

Am I a coward to refuse?

The constant misuse

Of the pretexts conducted

Serving justice obstructed

Giving the right to end life

Is not a responsibility for those without light

To illuminate the darkened, muddled truth

In which they’re pawns for their use

So No sir Uncle Sam I’m sorry

But my mind cannot be worried

For if I am a coward to refuse

I am a coward you cannot use

Men must go to fight

For romantic reasons, not human rights

Take your orders, without question

You wonder why you won’t get into heaven.

Kill the weak, slaughter the mothers

Take out your hostility you can’t release into others

Your heart is racing, exhilarating peace

You bathe in the blood of those you’ve released.

Uncle Sam wants-- you --, for your services,

To kill for -- his-- imperial purposes.

Ironic in the country of the free

To have a populous as blind as sheep

Build more weaponry, it’s a race that’s heavenly

Ignore the devil’s grin

Your hypocrisy in your democracy

Is your immoral sin

Down the streets, walking cadavers

To be mindless is such a tragic endeavor

Look at yourself as a whole.

Realize their puppet show.

I wake up, safe in my bed

My eyes wide, thoughts rushing to my head

To look in the mirror, see the future

And, to myself, become an abstract creature.

Critique away. No offense to those soldiers serving for our country. I am thankful for the sacrifice you have made for those of us at home.

This is just my take on the hypocrisy of the US Government, and their pretexts for wars.

Alone in my room

Taking in the world’s knowledgeable boon

It speaks in secret tongues heard by the strange

Or maybe the insane

Young men must go fight

For romantic purposes, not human rights

Kill the children, without question

Won’t you wonder why you’ll never get into heaven?

Kill the weak, slaughter the mothers

Take out your hostility you can’t release onto others

Your heart is racing, exhilarating peace

You bathe in the blood of those who you’ve deceased.

Uncle Sam wants you, for your services,

To kill for imperial purposes.

Ironic in the country of the free

To have a populous as blind as sheep

Build more weaponry, it’s a race that’s heavenly

The devil grins

Your hypocrisy in your democracy

Is your mortal sin

Walk down the street, a walking cadaver

To be mindless is such a tragic endeavor

Take a trip down the rabbit hole,

Look at yourself as a whole.

Realize their puppet show.

I wake up, safe in my bed

My eyes wide, thoughts rushing to my head

To look in the mirror, see the future

And, to myself, become an abstract creature.

--- This is the poem I have created for my Theory of Knowledge class. I am pursuing the IB Diploma, and hope to achieve an A on this assignment. I am open to constructive criticism. Please be mature in your responses, but be honest as well. If you didn't like it, please explain why. I am looking to better my work in any way possible, and am open to many suggestions. I will also provide any clarifications if you do not get the meaning behind the work. Thank you, :)

Just sitting in my room

Taking in the world’s knowledgeable boon

It speaks in secret tongues heard by the strange

Or maybe it’s just the insane

Young men must go fight

For romantic purposes, not human rights

Kill the children, without question

Won’t you wonder why you’ll never get into heaven?

Kill the weak, slaughter the mothers

Take out your hostility you can’t release onto others

Your heart is racing, exhilarating peace

You bathe in the blood of those who you’ve deceased.

Uncle Sam wants you, for your services,

To kill for imperial purposes.

Ironic in the country of the free

To have a populous as blind as sheep

Build more weaponry, it’s a race that’s heavenly

The devil grins

Your hypocrisy in your democracy

Is your mortal sin

Walk down the street, a walking cadaver

To be mindless is such a tragic endeavor

Take a trip down the rabbit hole,

Look at yourself as a whole.

Realize their puppet show.

I wake up, safe in my bed

My eyes wide, thoughts rushing to my head

To look in the mirror, see the future

And, to myself, become an abstract creature.

--- This is the poem I have created for my Theory of Knowledge class. I am pursuing the IB Diploma, and hope to achieve an A on this assignment. I am open to constructive criticism. Please be mature in your responses, but be honest as well. If you didn't like it, please explain why. I am looking to better my work in any way possible, and am open to many suggestions. I will also provide any clarifications if you do not get the meaning behind the work. Thank you, :)

So I have been talking to this girl for some time now, and I was really starting to like her, and I know she likes me...

But of course there's a downside... She smokes pot and drinks, but doesn't really show it ever.

I am straight-edge and don't think doing drugs and such is right, I think I really like her, but is it really worth it?

(She says she does pot because it's always been there for her... I told her if we were to go out, she would have to lose it... and I would always be there for her instead :)

So lemme know... is it worth it? Should I really try to make this work or should I search for someone else?

Does anyone else think Death Magnetic is going to be a dud? Listening to "Death Is Not The End" and "Vulturous" do not give me much hope... Anyone else having this feeling?

D.I.N.T.E - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5k92R7IVbDs

Vulturous - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0PRJCDPty0

I hit my head

On a soft pillow

Half-Dead

Like a Weeping Willow

I awake

I prepare for the day

I dress in my suit, so fake

Memorizing what so say

I accept my work

Year in

Year out

Causing a breakdown

Of my anguished shouts

I am in a rut

I cannot defeat

Psychic screams

My safety retreats

Confusion and Nostalgia

My only emotions

Only the Future knows

My worldly devotions

The power to create

The power to destroy

The power to raise

A small little boy

Whichever road I take

I choose in time

For I take a path

That's less than divine

A Medicine man

Cures the pain

Healing hands

Happiness he feigns

A writer

Burrows his sorrows away

In the poetry

He write all day

Each road ends

It's the truth in life

We make amends

And forget our spite

I changed some things this time, trying to make it make more sense and rhyme a little better. Looking for some constructive feedback! Cheers =D

Yesterday will be a memory

Tomorrow an impossibility

I stand upon this pedastal

It will pave my personal road to hell

Dying to live, Living to die

Sharpen the blade and end my life

Remember her face

Your last disgrace

Silence my only friend

The only thing there in the end

[Chorus]

Carve her name into your arm

Bring your life mortal harm

You will never see the dawn

Always bein' second best

Jab the knife into your chest

No regrets!

[Chorus]

You fantasize the agony

Oh how much you would be pleased

As you bow onto your knees

You realize your destiny

Take away your life

End your world of spite

Fight it off with might

You'll only end the light

The world is in your hands

You have the master plan

Be you god or man

Mortality demands

[Chorus]

Carve her name into your arm

Bring your life -- mortal harm

You will never see the dawn

Always bein' second best

Jab the knife into your chest

---No regrets!

[Chorus]

You push the trigger

Bite the bullet

You never thought you'd actually pull it

The taste explodes

Your stature breaks

Your last move, was your last mistake

The world has gone black

All you see is red

You were never prepared for the land of the dead

Brimstone and fire you're final grave

But hell is the price you must pay

This would be a Melodic Death Metal song, with some ties to older Thrash metal such as Exodus... All tips appreciated!

There I sit

Upon the world

I envision your death

And consuming your soul

You're the being

Who speaks heresies

Your truths no meaning

They're all just fairy tales

Anger swells inside of me

I visualize destiny

Tearing your life

Killing in spite

Back to reality

You spit your venom at me

Chaos begins to swell

As I introduce you to hell

I bring you pain

Envisioning

The evil things I'll do

As you sleep

Cut your throat

Leave you for dead

As the blood pours

Onto the bed

I bathe in the madness

Angers sweet call

The blade's Finesse

The writings on the wall

I don't see why everyone is adding their age afterwards but, I guess I will as well. I am 15 years of age, and often act more mature than others haha. Honest opinions sought, I wrote this when I was upset. It was a great way to relieve stress, and I tried to keep it short. Thanks for the help and cheers! : ]