JEN

My marriage is like this: I am floating down a lovely river in a canoe with a beautiful tiger. As long as I sit perfectly still we float along happily. People on the banks say "Gee what a lovely sight. What a lucky girl to be in the company of such a magnificent animal." I love the tiger and the canoe but occasionally I imagine a new slightly more comfortable position, like resting my foot on the side of the boat. The minute I move a muscle, the tiger attacks. The canoe carried precious cargo so for a long time I couldn't chance making any movement whatsoever.

Now it is just me and my magnificent Tiger in the canoe. If I want to make an adjustment, even a small one, I chance being eaten alive. But it is only me who will be eaten.

This is a terrible thing for a wife to put up with. What's worse, is that we have a substantial age difference and he has gotten old, and less attractive to me, and may retire in a few years. That will give him even more time to be with me and that's simply not to be tolerated. I'm thinking that I would have been better off to have married a man my own age. And if I want to get a divorce and find a younger man, this is the right time for me since I am still young and attractive. The question is will I suffer from a lot of guilt since that would be a rather shitty thing to do to a man who has given me 25 years and two children?

This is the Yahoo Question my Husband posed to me at breakfast this morning. He wrote it from his own perspective. It is what he THINKS I think.

How would YOU respond to this?

My 20 year old daughter is suffering from them. We believe they were brought about by the suppression of her immune system and stress caused by a nearly fatal auto accident about a year ago.

She is having a lot of pain even though the rash is not wide spread or severe. She has seen her physician who says they cannot treat her with the usual meds because the rash is more than three days old.

My 78 year old mother has been widowed twice and is currently living with my 56 year old sister who is also a widow. SHe has been living with my sister since about 1 month after her second husband died. THey get along like cats and dogs. My mother was about to move out at my sister's request in June when flooding struck the Mid-West.

Mom and sis have come to an uneasy truce (according to my sis that is. mom thinks everything is fine fine fine). BUT my Mom is thinking of buying a trailer close to a friend of hers.

I offered to have mom come and live with my husband and I when things were bad between mom and sis and actually cleared out the upstairs of our house to make lots of comfortable space for her. But I have always said that I think mom should be independant for as long as she is able.

Now Mom wants to know if she should buy that trailer or move in with me (800 miles from her friends and the rest of the family.)

The issue is that she thinks she doesn't want to live alone anymore.

Does anyone have insight into the idea that a healthy 78 year old woman might not want to live alone? Seems strange to me. Mom won't elaborate.

I know it is roasted chick peas but I am not sure if you use dried chick peas or cooked ones to roast.

I am willing to pay 200 a night and I will be traveling with my husband and no children.

I want something quiet at night but lively during the day and evening.

I have one unit upstairs and one downstairs. I am trying to optimize energy usage and energy costs. Should they be set at the same temp?