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darthbeefer
Finally the ultimate question?
Congratulations you are alive and reading this right now take a deep breath and bathe in the light of your existence. then answer the following question:
what is left when you empty your mind?
8 AnswersReligion & Spirituality8 years agoNeed help with my story?
I'm writing a book about a meek accountant 'Joel' who is thrust violently into a life of adventure when he meets a schizophrenic stripper called 'D Spice' in particular having issues with writing the following raunchy scene any feedback would be appreciated:
'D Spice swayed her voluptuous body to the heavy tribal rhythms playing on my state of the art stereo. with a cheeky grin that only a chimpanzee on acid could give she crept towards me with an incandescently glowing rose gripped between her gold capped teeth, I could smell the aromatic sweat of her body as it wafted like a squadron of spitfires during the Battle of Britain into my small and quivering nose. D Spice used her powerful muscular hands to rip my clothes off as if she were peeling an orange after walking for three days in the desert with no water and a migraine. My pale skinny body that closely resembled a white tootbrush wrapped in raw chicken skin quaked as I used my superior mental faculties to calculate what she might possibly do next. I was shocked then as she screamed the scream of a million drunk teenagers that had just been electrocuted by a strange man. Her nipples were like glazed strawberries standing to attention as if they were well trained troops parading before a majestic queen. Her tongue darted in my most sacred crevices like a sea turtle looking for tasty urchins, her musk mingled with my sweat and the leak in my roof and her strong body rocked on my fragile bones like a fat drunk wrestler riding a small mule. I moaned she issued a great terrific amazing bellow that shook the room and left my ears ringing for days....
not sure any tips to make it better
4 AnswersBooks & Authors8 years agojavascript problems - alert doesn't seem to work?
not sure why my code isn't working ...user should guess a colour and then have an alert tell them if they were right or wrong..but nothing happens ..html is fine I have the text field and button but nothing happens on button click..not sure why..help?
html:
<!doctype html>
<html>
<head>
<title>Page 4</title>
<link rel="stylesheet" href="RH.css">
<meta charset="utf-8">
<script src="jsf/Page4.js"></script>
<script>window.onload = Go;</script>
</head>
<body>
<div class = "wrap">
<div class = "head">
<h1>HTML 5 and Java Practice</h1>
</div>
<div class = "nav">
<div class = "navbox">
<p class = "navi"><a href = "Index.html" title = "back to page 1">Page 1</a></p>
</div>
<div class = "navbox">
<p class = "navi"><a href = "page2.html" title = "more stuff">Page 2</a></p>
</div>
<div class = "navbox">
<p class = "navi"><a href = "page3.html" title = "even more stuff">Page 3</a></p>
</div>
<div class = "navbox">
<p class = "navi"><a href = "page4.html" title = "more yeah">Page 4</a></p>
</div>
<div class = "navbox">
</div>
<div class = "navbox">
</div>
</div>
<div class = "main">
<h1>Guess the colour. Answer in lower case</h1>
<form>
<input type="text" id="guess" size="40" placeholder="guess a colour">
<input type="button" id="guessBut" value="Guess">
</form>
</div>
</div>
</body>
</html>
javascript:
function Go(){
var but = document.getElementById("guessBut");
but.onclick = clickBut;
}
function clickBut(){
var guessInput = document.getElementById("guess");
var guess = guessInput.value;
var answer = checkGuess(guess);
alert(answer);
}
function checkGuess(guess){
var answers = {"red","blue","green","yellow","purple","orange"}
var index = Math.floor(Math.random()*answers.length);
if(guess == answers[index]){
answer = "you got it buddy";
}
else{
answer = "nope that's not it, I was thinking of " + answers[index];
}
return answer;
}
probably something really obvious but is frustrating the hell outta me
2 AnswersProgramming & Design9 years agojavascript error ..function not defined?
I keep getting an error that states my function is not defined which is strange here is my code:
<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta http-equiv="Content-type" content="text/html;charset=UTF-8" />
<title>Beefs Javascript Practice switch</title>
<link type="text/css" rel="stylesheet" href="beefJSprac.css" />
</head>
<body>
<h1>Beef's Javascript Practice - Switch</h1>
<script type="text/javascript">
function foodQuiz(){
var food = prompt("what is your favourite food","");
switch (food){
case "pie":
alert("enjoy a nice pie matey");
break;
case "pizza":
alert("nothing like some nice pizza");
break;
case "apple":
alert("apples are healthy");
break;
case "cookie":
alert("you need some milk with that cookie");
break;
case "pasta":
alert("you need good sauce for pasta");
break;
case "mexican":
alert("mmm taco's, burritos's mmm");
break;
case "ham":
showImage('ham.jpg',312,280,'ham');
break;
default:
alert("I don't know that food");
break;
}
}
</script>
<button onclick="foodQuiz()">Food Quiz</button>
</body>
</html>
any ideas on why this is happening ..it was running okay earlier
1 AnswerProgramming & Design9 years agoJava Android AVD info...?
I'm currently studying Java and looking to learn more about building android apps ..so I'm ready to build some AVD's but not sure where to start ..I'm figuring most people keep pretty up to date with phones etc.. and also by the time I've built something it will be a while so I have been looking to find settings for the phones on this link:
http://www.pcworld.com/reviews/collection/3286/top...
it's a top ten list for android phones for 2012..I have found some good sites that list avd specs but they're a bit old and I need some specs that are for current popular phones..is there any other way to get these specs or any good sites you can recommend?....also any good tips on app building with java for android would be awesome
1 AnswerProgramming & Design9 years agoUsing printf to right align a String?
Hi guys basically I want to print my burger description in alignment with my item name :
Item# Name Price
______ ____ _____
1 hamburger 1.95
(A delicious tasty burger made from amazing ingredients)
I have managed it here by using spaces in my printf statement ..surely there must be another way to indicate that I want my string to commence so many spaces from the left
String hb = "hamburger";
String cb = "cheeseburger";
double hbp = 1.95;
double cbp = 2.50;
int x = 1;
String desc = "(A delicious tasty burger made from amazing ingredients)";
System.out.printf("%-10d %-20.20s %-10.2f \n",x, hb,hbp);
System.out.printf(" %s",desc + "\n");
as you can see I have had to actually use spaces to position my desc STring where I want it ..this just seems a bit silly and I have searched all over the googlesphere to find a printf statement that will align my String where I want it w/out success ..you can use %-30s to left align a string so how can I specifiy that I want to the string to commence x number of spaces to the right?
2 AnswersProgramming & Design9 years agojava animation for loop delay method?
I basically want to delay my loop so that the car moves smoothly from left to right
my code:
import java.applet.Applet;
import java.awt.*;
public class CarApplet extends Applet{
public void paint(Graphics g){
for(int i = 0;i < 20; i++){
drawBackGround(g);
drawCar(g,10*i,80,80,60,Color.blue);
//delay loop by 100 milliseconds
}
repaint();
}
I have tried Thread.sleep ..without success my applet just freezes up
2 AnswersProgramming & Design9 years agoeasiest way to set up a SQL Database on my mAC?
I am currently studying computer technology and basically a beginner ..I was wondering if anyone had any advice on the easiest way I can set up a SQL database on my mac so I can practice building DB's and querying them ...is MySQL the best way to go ..or are there other easier options ..any links to good websites would be awesome...thank you
3 AnswersProgramming & Design9 years agoJava programming question...?
I was mucking around after doing some tutorials and decided I wanted to create a program that asked if you wanted to enter some info and if you did you would enter it and then it would ask you again if you would like to enter it again..so it's basically some kind of looping if statement ...if choice = 1 do this then ask again if choice !=1 do something else ..I can't seem to figure out how to program this ...I have managed to do something though which is below but it isn't what I'm after I hope I make sense
package myprac1;
import java.util.Scanner;
public class musoClub {
public static void main(String[] args) {
Scanner input = new Scanner(System.in);
System.out.println("how many musicians will you enter into the club? ");
int size = input.nextInt();
for(int index=1;index<=size;index++){
System.out.println("Enter the musicians name ");
String nme = input.next();
System.out.println("Enter the instrument they play");
String inst = input.next();
musos clubman = new musos(nme, inst);
System.out.print(clubman.getName());
System.out.print(" plays the ");
System.out.print(clubman.getInstrument());
System.out.println(" and is one of: " + clubman.getMembers() + " members");
System.out.println(" \n ");
}
}
}
this code allows me to basically do what I want but I have to declare how many times I want to enter info before I start the loop ..I was wondering how I can have a loop that continues as long as I press 1..I tried setting a while loop to while(choice==1) ...stuff .....and then ask choice again in the loop but eclipse didn't like me using the variable choice in the while loop ..any help would be great it's not for an assignment ..just for general interest
1 AnswerProgramming & Design9 years agoShins hurt but only when running after running they are fine?
I am unfit and starting to try and get some in as they say I went for a jog on a grass oval today and set myself a small goal...as I jogged the middle of my shin bone hurt..when I stopped jogging there was no pain at all and there is no pain at home now so I don't think it's shin splints or whatever ..just wondering if it is normal to feel pain in the shins when you start running..I felt really good after the run even though it was a short distance but I don't want to end up damaging myself
4 AnswersRunning9 years agoCan you guess this film as well....first correct answer gets points?
-snow
-training
-amusement park
-long white hair
1 AnswerMovies10 years agoCan you guess the film...first correct answer wins?
-wonderboy
-polish
-south africa
-soccer ball
3 AnswersMovies10 years agoIs my son going to be a low achiever?
some background ..my son is two and a half years old yet he still doesn't know the periodic table of the elements ( despite my repeated learning sessions with him) and he has failed to grasp the concept of multi nuclear frission dynamics I have also noticed that he likes to throw things around and grins like an idiot ..should I just forget the college fund and accept he's probably going to end up being a manual labourer or a drug dealer...sigh
2 AnswersOther - Careers & Employment10 years agoHow would/do you feel if / when someone in your family has..?
opposing views of religion or spirituality?
how do you deal with someone close to you that doesn't agree with your views on religious or spiritual or other core beliefs ?
and what does this say about you?
9 AnswersReligion & Spirituality10 years agoIn your opinion what is the greatest film acting performance of all time?
and why?
2 AnswersTheater & Acting10 years agoIf God cheated on his wife ? ..what would she do..?
and if he cheated on her with numerous angels..goddesses ..how could he make it up to her?
just brainstorming ideas..
oh and are there any names for god's wife in line with his name of Jehovah or Yahweh etc..
7 AnswersReligion & Spirituality10 years agoIs Herman Cain the greatest Comedian that ever lived..?
I mean the guy keeps cracking me up ..it's like he's pulled the wool over our eyes and is deliberately acting the fool for our humorous entertainment..do you feel the same?
10 AnswersElections10 years agoI need help with an idea for a book?
I need help with characters..and plot..and genre..first or third person?..historical fiction..or biographical..tell you what ..will someone just write an awesome book for me to publish in my name ..thanx
7 AnswersBooks & Authors10 years agoIs this Religious metaphorical equation an accurate reflection of earth?
begin the equation....now
1 AnswerReligion & Spirituality10 years agoI miss Ashton I cannot survive without his tweets ..I need to know..?
what he's eating, when will the world end, what's Demi wearing? OMG what can I do..
1 AnswerCelebrities10 years ago