Colossus

Hi. I am setting upi a new web design site and, although it sounds ridiculous, I am stuck on ideas for a name - ie, domain name.

The site is targeting a large market and will cater for small 5 page type sites to complete CMS systems.

Any ideas would be useful. I am stuck in a 'writers block' state.!

Who would have thought I'd be stuck on this?

Like:

What do you call a poodle, out in the rain and getting drenched?

A PUDDLE.

Daisy at school:

Teacher: If I give you 2 rabbits and another 2 rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Daisy: 5 miss.

Teacher: I'll try again so listen this time. If I give you 2 rabbits and another 2 rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?

Daisy: 5 miss.

Teacher: Now Daisy, I'm getting really cross. How have you got 5?

Daisy - in tears: Because I've already got 1 at home miss!

Trying to find the name of that classic sexy love song - that was once banned by the bbc.

Anyone know please?

PS Got a date comuing over tonight and thought that beautiful piece of music would be nice in the backgroubd - later.

Aww, help! Please, pretty please....

My brother was asked by his son, 'Dad, where are the Alps?'

He answered, 'Oh I don't know son, ask your Mom, she puts everything away around here'.

Try this with google translate;

Enter in left box;

Will yahoo members ever reach puberty

Covert to VIETNAMESE

Copy the result and paste it back into the left hand box. It will detect Vietnamese.

The result re-translation to English is;

Yahoo members never reached puberty

Any more howlers like this?

The Titanic was a luxury liner in its short time. It nearly had all the 'modern' entertainment facilities on-board except one. What was it?

Hint: Music & Dance.

10 million points for best answer.

Do you;

1. Slap t*** and ride on ripples

2. Keep moving lumps of fat up till you smell sh** and then go back one

OR

.........

So, when you're in space - like you do as per norm - which way does your compass point?

If you love something, set it free.

If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours.

If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.

If it just sits in your living room, messes up your

stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes

your money, and never behaves as if you actually set it

free in the first place . . .

So, what had you done?

A tall, well-built woman with good

sense of humor, who can cook frog

legs and who appreciates a good fuc-

schia garden, classic music and

without getting too serious.

But please only read lines 1,3 and 5.

To impress a women we men;

1.compliment her

2. cuddle her

3. kiss her

4. caress her

5. love her

6. stroke her,

7. tease her

8. comfort her

9. protect her

10. hug her

How should women impress a man? Here's a start.

1. show up naked

2. bring beer.

3. .....

etc

I'm an optimist, that's why I do crosswords with a pencil!

What do other optimists do to get through daily life?

Which browser do you prefer? This applies to both Windows and Linux users. I primarily use Linux but use Windows when needed. My preference is Mozilla Firefox on both operating systems.

Just for fun, Mozilla have a silly 'bible' about the development of Firefox against Internet Explorer called 'The Book of Mozilla'. It is only a virtual one. Her's an extract;

Mammon is Internet Explorer.

The beast is Mozilla Firefox.

Mammon slept. And the beast reborn spread over the earth and its numbers

grew legion. And they proclaimed the times and sacrificed crops unto the

fire, with the cunning of foxes. And they built a new world in their own

image as promised by the sacred words, and spoke of the beast with their

children.

Mammon awoke, and lo! it was naught now but a follower.

from The Book of Mozilla, 11:9

Incidentally, I am 'playing' around with Android and no, I'm not trying to promote Firefox in any way - its just my fave.

So what's yours?

I did one night when my 14yo son was having friends round. My wife and I were going to a fancy dress party. I answered the door to his friends whilst dressed in the fancy dress outfit - a tart with stockings, lipstick, cascarra, wig - the works! And they new it was me but nothing about the party that I was going to!

What a day my son had at school the next day!

Ha ha ha ha.