Pam

I have a good story that a man have fifteen bum cheeks but everybody wants to feel them cause it's different. He doesn't know whether to stay in his small town or move to the city and perform. What should happen next?

And who do you think will win the next general election?

I have been having contractions for three days. They were regular but painless. I woke up this morning, had diahorria, lost more of my mucus plug in, bloody show. I've been having the same contractions since but now they are painful. I thought I'd wait a while before phoning hospital in case it's a false alarm. Baby is moving in between contractions which are seven minutes apart. What's your thoughts.

P.s. sorry about vulgarity.

I'm about 40 weeks and I really don't fancy a membrane sweep. Baby is healthy as far as I know and already weighs (from latest scan) about nine pounds.

There is a massive rift in my family. My brother's partner does not like me and made this very clear last year when she decided to try and ruin my wedding. I am my sister's maid of honour for her wedding this year. i have been planning and consulting with the other bridesmaids regarding decisions we are considering for my sisters hen night. My brother's girlfriend hadn't gotten back to me about anything.

The other day I sent a message on facebook, through which we have been corresponding, letting her know that I would go up town and get decorations and accessories for hen night if this was ok. I didn't hear anything back but i know she is always on facebook as she is always posting stuff. Moreover she has replied to messages through this system of communication.

I went up town on the day planned and bought stuff. She then came round to my mums house later that day saying she bought everything I bought. She didn't inform me she was going to buy anything. I wrote to the other bridesmaids on facebook to let them know that 'i got decorations as i said i would.'

Two days later there was a hoo ha about putting up the decorations. I said that we'd have to wait for saturday as my mother didn't want anyone round her house until then and suggested afternoon however found out one bridesmaid was busy then. I then suggested saturday morning. I then read a snotty message on public page on facebook from my brothers girlfriend saying 'you can choose your boyfriend and not his family.' My brother wrote another message saying some people should look in the mirror (amongst an array of swear words).

I got upset re this. She also sent me a private message saying I should know her shifts. I don't know her shifts cause we never really speak besides shifts change. It appears she was working til 1am on friday so wouldn't be able to make it saturday during the morning. Why couldn't she tell me this like an adult? I wasn't trying to be awkward, just trying to arrange a time.

What followed was a torrent of abuse on facebook and she didn't go to hen night despite me texting and facebook messaging apologies to her if i caused offense in any way. She told my family to 'go f*ck themselves.' My brother then went to my mums house to yell at me and my mum. All i was trying to do was plan my sisters hen night and run things past the other bridesmaids and this happens.

I was apprehensive about her being a bridesmaid as we don't generally get along and I got upset at christmas about this. She found out. But i thought we made up as we went to a dress fitting with my sister the other week and we both made an effort. I have always tried to involve her in plans and ask if decisions etc are okay. To make it worse I am eight months pregnant and she is treating me like this. What do you think i should do in this situation. The wedding is only a month away and I want my sister to have the best day possible without this hanging over her.

Mine is Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah, especially Jeff Buckley's cover. I also like every tear drop is a waterfall by Coldplay.

He is on a roll this week. How should I get my own back on him?

... and does anyone know any good definitions/ quotes re ethical dilemmas?

Many horses get injured. Some are put down as a result. However, some people argue that the horses have a good quality of life.

What are peeps thoughts on this?

I know I sound bonkers but I'm paranoid about most things these days. I was wondering if it's safe to do a lot of sketching when pregnant. I am scared of lead poisoning as the graphite seems to rub onto my skin from the paper. Maybe I'm going too far and should relax a litte. What are your thoughts on the matter?

I wake up in the night and the cat is going for it. So I shut her out of my room but she has been meowing and clawing at the door to get in. I was reading my newspaper today she started humping my leg again under the table. Is this unusual behaviour?

We don't get along with our neighbours as it is. They have an outdoor cat too. I think they are trying to grow grass but I have noticed our cat keeps going to the toilet on the same spot in the garden. my husband saw our neighbour spraying something at our cat the other day to scare her off. Every time the cat goes near that spot the neighbour comes out to chase her away. I think they are getting annoyed and I don't want to spark world ward three.

I started to encourage her away from that area but it doesn't work so I'm keeping her in at the moment but she is desperate to get out. Any suggestions?

I work in a call centre. I know in this current climate we are lucky to have a job but I need to rant about mine, to let it off my chest.

I work in an inbound call centre. It is run like an army camp. My manager is snide, has no people skills.

Recently they have put on pressure to sell. I find this hard as most customers are phoning in with a complaint, problem. A lot of them decline although I do try.

They've strated putting out an email which highlights those who do not meet sales targets. Last week they wrote on the email 'for those of you highlighted in red your manager will be speaking to you direct.'

I find this name and shame procedure rather disgusting. Then we have those bragging who have met sales figures. I think a lot of this is to do with luck. You may just happen to get that happy customer (although this understandably hardly happens) who is in the right frame of mind to sell to!

I don't like forcing my customers into getting things they don't want. A lot of them have done their homework and know they are cheaper with the other company for that particular thing. And I don't blame them.

I don't like this company. They are loosing customers because they won't lower prices and rather than lower prices like their competitors they put pressure on us to make sales. But i don't work in the sales department and sales was never part of my job description. I'm just not a sales person. And with this company I feel like it's like trying to sell sand on the beach (a sandy one)!

Anyway since I'm back to work tomorrow I just needed an online rant. I'd love to get another job but I'm pregnant and showing.

Anyone else hate their job?

I work in a horrible job (suppose most of us do) with bosses on a power trip shooting you down all the time, customers phoning all the time complaining, complaint after complaint, my headset doesn't work, I don know how t do anything due to baby brain, I'm continually stressed. I'm worried because I'm fourteen weeks pregnant and I feel depressed. Its purely wor related. When I go in i get a stomping headache which lasts all day and I feel down. I haven't signed a contract yet. I've screwed up some stuff but deep down I hope I'm not offered a new contract because I really don't want to work there. I'm just worried about my baby. I don't want to disappoint m husband leaving him with all the bills. I know I won't get another job. I tried getting my old job back but I don't think it'll happen. Has anyone been in this situation before and how would ou deal with tis? Any advice?

I mean I am sitting there in my chair as happy as larry then all of a sudden the dogs butt wheezes omitting a nasty pugnant odour. I then find myself being sick. Meanwhile I'm sure the dog is grinning, it's tail is waggling like mad. Then I find the dog eating my cheese puffs as I'm throwing up!