Selene

I really love photography, film, and editing. I've been thinking of buying a camera. Any suggestions as to which camera I should get? Thank you in advance. :)

I'm 15 now. Ever since I was a little girl, I've been hearing voices, like someone calling my name when no one had. I've always been horrible at making friends, and since I was 4 years old, I've been self harming. (I know, horrible.) Also, when I was in bed at home when I was a child, sometimes I would hear bells ringing, a hear people laughing at me. I would get these delusions that I wasn't safe and that my whole family is in danger. I would hear random noises. Also, I went through this 2-3 year phase when I thought I controlled the wind and that I was magical.

Now, I rarely hear the voices. I just see people and shadows. Like if I'm in the house, I'll see someone walking down the street, then they'll disappear. Or I'll see an animal, but then it suddenly disappears. There's also this man named Jordan. He is coming to get me. A few times I've heard him in my house. He sends me messages and we communicate telepathically. Sometimes I think that he is going to bomb a public area I am in, such as a subway or a mall. Because of this, I'm terrified to go anywhere.

I hate people touching me. I've never been in a relationship, and only a few people know I'm like this. I've done some research on schizophrenia, and I also found out that my family has a history of mental disorders. I have depression and social anxiety. I'm so scared.

I've never taken drugs, which I know can cause schizophrenia in some cases. Lately, my parents have told me that I've been acting violently and with a lot of attitude lately.

Please tell me your opinion. Thank you :0

Okay, well, here goes. I'm 14, and I just started high school. I made a friend, named Beatrice. She cuts and self-harms, and so do I. (Countless bullying, don't ask. I have it under control. Trust me.)

The group that is mean to us has a Tumblr account, and they follow Beatrice. (Not me, though, they don't know about mine). There's this girl named Aisha, and Beatrice is kinda sending her hate mail, because she's jealous of her.

Well, the group found out, and now they're really beating down on Beatrice, saying the most awful things to her imaginable, I don't even want to repeat it. Especially on here. But it's really hurting her! And ever since they found out, she's tried to kill herself 4 times. That's in one month.

I'm terrified. Like I said, I get bullied too. So I'm just so scared, that I come to school one morning, and she's not there. Then I'll be alone. She's my only friend. I don't want her to die. She's only 14.

So, I was going to tell Aisha it was me. Because the messages ARE anonymous, and I have a perfectly believable explanation to get them to stop being mean to Beatrice. However, I'm pretty sure you can get suspended for cyber-bullying, and if the group tells the principal, I'm done.

But, if I don't tell them it was me, and Beatrice dies, I don't know what I'll do. I'm just so scared and alone right now, and I really need help. I don't know what to do.

Should I do this?

Thanks in advance.

My only friend and I noth go through bullying at school for the past 5 years, and it sucks. We have been together. We stay together through everything together. So on Tuesday, when she told me she was going to finally commit suicide, I freaked out. She said that if she's not at school, I'll know where she is.

So on Wednesday, she was not in school. And I kind of had a heart attack. I stopped breathing when she was not sitting beside me in science. I was terrified. Absolutely terriified.

Today, she was also not in school. I'm so scared. I talked to one of her neighbours, and she said she hasn't seen my friend, but they see eachother all the time on the street. I asked her neighbour if she could text my friend's sister, so she did. I have not heard from any of them, but I got a call from her mother. She said my friend is recovering in the hospital. She was in critical state and was not allowed visiters. And that she would stay there on a 45 day program.

When I was alone in my room that night, I was bawling my eyes out. I felt so terrifed, vulnerable and alone. Now I'll have to deal with the bullying all on my own. And I don't know if I can last 45 days without her. I don't know what to do. Some part of me wants to get myself on the 45 day plan in the hospital, but I can't miss that much training and school.

I don't know what to do. I am so lost and miserable. Alone and vulnerable. I don't want to deal with the bullying on my own. I can't talk to anyone else. No one understands. Not like she did. I'm terrified. The only thing I've eaten since Tuesday was an apple and a cup of milk.

What do I do to help me until she gets back? Please help me.

Okay, I have NO IDEA how I am failing science! This is very wrong.

On my tests, I got a 97% and a 75% The tests are counted as equal! I should be getting 86%!!! But I am getting a 44% instead! how could this happen? What can I do to fix this?

Thank you in advance.

I am 14 years old and I really want to get sponsored this winter. I am pretty good. I can do a backflip and I can spin a 720. I am okay on rails too, but I tend to just do 180 on,180 off, or I just front/back board it then switch out.

How do I get noticed? There are not many people who are looking for new snowboarders to sponsor where I live. What can I do? I am very competitive, and I will go around the world if I have to get noticed. (It's okay with my parents, they're encouraging me to do more snowboarding.)

And do you think that I am good enough? There are so many other amazing snowboarders my age that are better than me!

I know I have to make a sponsor me video, and I am getting a GoPro for Christmas, so I'll be able to get some sweet shots with that.

Please tell me how you got sponsored if you can, and share stories. All the help is appreciated! Thanks in advance!

And I'm a shy loser. I'm not like any of the girls at my school. I don't wear make up, I don't wear girly clothes, I don't want a boyfriend, and I never ever talk. And I get bullied a lot because of these things. People say there's something wrong with me. I only have one friend. She's a girly girl. She wants me to go to dances and parties and start dating and wear make up. I'm so scared of all of that. I just don't want us to drift apart.

And the worst thing is, for some reason, a lot of boys like me. It's really annoying and awkward. Today, a boy I know just came up to me and hugged me for no reason. That was really scary.

I just don't know what to do. I just want to be able to not be the way I am. I want to be more outgoing. But I'm just scared to be.

I'm 14 by the way.

How do I tell my friend that I don't want to go to parties and dances and I don't want a boyfriend.

Please help.

I'm a 14 year old girl and I really want to go pro this winter. And by doing that, I need to train as much as I can. And I'm not great at rails. So I want to get/build one. (Plus, it's easier than trying to build a jump in my backyard.)

I have no shortage in snow because I live in Canada and in a condo where a snow plow comes and dumps all the snow from the streets onto a curb near my home. So I could just shovel the snow from the mound and build a take off.

My friend built a rail in her backyard. I asked her how, and she said fiberglass and wood. She said nothing after that.

Anyways, I just want to get better on jibs. Have any of you built a rail before in your backyard? Please tell me. The Olympics is two years away, and time doesn't wait.

Thanks in advance.

Yeah, I'm different. I take my own path and I don't care about anyone's opinion.

Like for example, I'm 14 and I've never kissed, hugged or dated a boy because I simply don't want to. I just don't feel like it. I don't like any of the boys in my school. When I 'should' be crushing on all the hot boys.

I'm a snowboarder. I'm a tomboy. I never shop. It's torture. I get my clothes when I win snowboard competitions. (I'm in Provincials, so I get quite a lot.) And I never wear make up because I feel ugly when I do.

And I don't have many friends. I don't talk to people. Mostly because I was bullied (nearly to death) over Skype and I just can't really feel happy. No matter how long it's been.

My body is not 'matured' so people keep asking me if I wear a bra yet. (No, no I don't. They are uncomfortable and unnecessary.)

The thing is, people talk behind my back about how ugly I am, or maybe I should try a LITTLE make up. Or TRY shopping and looking fashionable. Or get kissed and feel the magical moment.

I hate it. Even my taste in music is different. I listen to stuff no one knows about. Stuff that is painful to listen to. But I love it.

I just hate the fact that people want me to do whatever they're doing. I don't want to get kissed. I don't want to be distracted with make up or clothes. I need to get sponsored for snowboarding this winter.

Another thing, I also have anorexia athletica, which is when you eat and then you burn it all off to stay fit for a sport. Which is what I do.

It's not easy. Sometimes, I just want to die. I hate the bullying. I hate the off-snowboard season. (Summer.) And I hate not being able to be me. How can I be happy again?

The only reason I haven't given up is because it has been my dream ever since I was three to compete in the Olympics. I have 3-7 years.

Please help?

I got a new board last year because my old one was wrecked and I needed a new one because I am in a more competitive league. Hence, a better board.

But now, it's de-laminating. And it was really expensive.

I just want to know if it's possible to re-laminate my board, and how expensive it will be.

I don't want to get a new board, because my parents are sending me off to train in the summer, and I don't want to make them spend more money.

Thanks in advance!

I'm a 14 year old girl and I live for snowboarding. It's my life. And I really want to try and go pro this summer.

I'm going to whistler to a camp called "Camp of Champions." (COC.) For more training. And I heard that you can get sponsored there. And I think I have a really good chance of getting sponsored. (I don't care if I'm 14. The companies want young people, anyways. I hope.)

I was just wondering how many sponsors I need. Or is it something like, you need fame and sponsors. I'm not sure.

I'm determined that I WILL make it to the Olympics. Because I never give up. Ever.

Thanks in advance.

Okay, so I'm a 14 year old girl, and snowboarding is my life. I'm going to COC this summer for training. And of course I'm excited, but I'm SO scared! I've seen the jumps, and they are massive, and I'm not very good at rails or pipe.

I'm on Provincials, so I can do SOME stuff, like consistent 360ºs off of 20' jumps and I can spin on and off rails, but the biggest jump I've ever gone off was only 35'! I'm also not afraid to hurt myself, and I know I'm going to have a blast, but I'm scared that no one is going to talk to me. (No one ever does) and that I'm not going to be able to do anything, because I'm too scared!

Anyways, I know there are airbags and trampolines and I know it's going to be THE BEST week of my life, but I'm SO scared! If anyone has gone before and would like to share their experiences with me, that'd be awesome!

Thanks!

I'm really worried, because today in health class, our teacher scared us into adopting children and cats by showing us all the wonderful, gross STI's you can get that can ruin you forever.

On the list of symptoms of 'trich' was vaginal odor, and discharge. And I have those two. (Only those two.) And I'm really worried, because I don't want an STI. Who does? And I definitely don't want to go to my parents and ask to be tested.

I'm 14. I don't have my period, I've never had sex, I don't share my sheets and blankets (they are washed once a week) Actually, I've never even hugged a boy. (And I don't want to. I'm 14, I mean, I have my whole LIFE ahead of me.)

I don't know what to do. Please help.

I have never had sex before, and I'm really scared, because I do have some of the symptoms of one of the parasitic STIs.

I'm only 14, I've never had sex, kissed, or even HUGGED a boy in my life! It's only because I don't date, because I'm too young. I'm going to wait.

Please help me.

I'm 14 and snowboarding is my life. I'm on the Provincial team and I've just finished an excellent season full of medals. =) And I won championships. (Fourth overall)

It's always been my dream to go to the Olympics. It's what I live for.

On jumps I can:

Front 180

Front 360

Front 540

Front 720 (Landed once)

On jibs I can:

Front 270 on, backside tail slide, 90 off.

Cabbed* back 180 onto small tube, regular off.

Front board, switch out (And reg. out)

Swivel

My goal for the Olympics is eight years. Do you think I can do it?

I'm from Ontario, and that's one of the best places to train!

Do you think within eight years of training will do it? Please tell me!

*Cabbed means switch.

Thanks in advance!

I started snowboarding when I was 6. I've been snowboarding for 8 years now, and this year, I was accepted into AOS, which is provincials. Last weekend were the final championships, and I won gold in both of my competitions.

This break, I'm going to a mountain where they have airbags so that you can try new stuff. I was going to try a back flip. Would that be a good idea?

My coach said that he was landing on his head and doing doubles, but he was fine.

I was wondering what to do for a back flip. I can do one consistently on a trampoline, and I was told they were easy.

Should I try it? I'm 14 by the way, and I think I'm ready for it!

(I'm on my way to the Olympics!)

I'm having a little trouble picking out a grad dress because of these little issues: (Graduating grade 8)

-I have no idea about fashion

-I HATE shopping

-I HATE dresses

-I'm self-conscious

I do NOT want a dress that is:

-Pink

-Strapless

-Noticeable

-Above the knee

-Flowy

-Detailed

Like I said, I'm a tomboy, and if I could, I'd show up in sweats. I'm looking for a dress that is:

-Cheap

-Black

-Conservative

-Not ugly, but not beautiful

-If not black, dark colours

I'm blonde with eyes that change from blue to green very often. (Different each day) And I'm flat cheasted, (I don't wear a bra) I'm really skinny because of athletic.

For hair and make-up, I'm doing: Nothing with my hair, I'm not even going to brush it. And I'm not wearing make up. Not even cover-up.

Does anyone have any ideas? Thank you so much!

Every so often, my music player just stops playing. It randomly pauses and I have to get up and press un-pause. It's very annoying, because this happens every 2-3 minutes.

It also doesn't pause when I press PAUSE. It keeps playing. And I know that I've full on pressed it. It only 'self-pauses' when I DON'T want it to and don't want to be distracted and have to un-pause it every 3 minutes. Like when I'm doing homework, or reading or typing books or knitting.

BUT, when I want to fall asleep to the sound of the music, I don't mind if it 'self-pauses'. Does it 'self-pause'? NO! So I have to get up and pause it! Very annoying.

Does anyone have any ideas to what I can do to get what ever is inside of my player out? I've done stuff like this before, so I'm not scared.

And if you think I'm crazy, you're right. I am. But you clicked on the question, so this is what you got. And if you think I'm high, you're WRONG. I'm 14 and I don't do drugs.

Thanks for your help =)

In December, I started Skyping some of the guys I know from my school. It started off pretty nice, they were funny!

Then they started to joke about me. They said stuff like, "Selene, I did your mother last night." And "Oh my god! Is that your mother on redtube? It is!" And stuff like, "I'm going to walk you home tomorrow from school so we can have a threesome in your bed," And other hurtful stuff like that. It got to the point where I started swearing at them. I cried and cried. I couldn't handle it, because they were laughing like I was too.

They tried calling me the next night. I declined. They called again, and I declined. They wouldn't stop calling, and when I finally picked up, they yelled, "Leave, we don't want you, b*tch!" And then hung up on me. Then they called again, and I said, "I have a crowbar and I'm going to bring it school and beat you with it." And to prove it, I v-chatted one of the boys and they took a picture of me with it. It got all over Facebook. I was embarrased and humiliated. And another boy had more pictures of me, and he told me that to keep the pictures from going onto google, I had to put up with his cr*p. And I did. It was the worst moment of my life.

It wouldn't stop until I deleted my Facebook, my Skype and I stopped talking and didn't really enjoy eating. So I didn't do much of it either.

I can't get a therapist, I can't talk to anyone, because I was pretty harsh myself, so I just was silent for a week. And before I went to bed, I pulled out a sharp stick and tried to rip my legs up with it.

It's March and I still haven't gotten over it. Does anyone know how I could cope with it? Being scarred for life hurts, and I'm still bleeding. I just need some stiches. Please help me.

Thanks for reading all of that. Thank you.

I'm probably the weirdest girl.

I'm 13 and I'm in grade 8. A lot of the girls at my school are getting into boyfriends and make up. I see no point in either of them. Isn't natural beauty nicer than fake beauty you pain on your face? And boyfriends. What's up with that? I'm in grade 8! So young! Why are we dating when you know you're going to break up? It's a waste of time. I have plenty of years to have my first kiss. And even one girl I know, had SEX!!! She's MY age!

And parties. Most girls and boys would LOVE to go to a party late at night. Not me. I'd rather study and perfect my grades so that I'm ready for High School. Parties are stupid. It's just loud music and you have to yell to hear your friends. Fun? No.

And the craziest part? I feel like the world is turning fake and delusional.

I feel like most of the people I know walk by life and don't even soak it all in. They don't actually get what they want out of it. Their life is an illusion. All they see is the outside and never even care to look deeper. Does anyone feel the same way?

Am I crazy? Or do I actually make SOME sense?

And I take karate for self defense in case of rapists. Is it wrong to want to have some self-defense? better safe than sorry.

-Selene