Knightess in Service to Queen Elsa

I dont say this because I want pity but my stomach is really really bad right now. Yesterday was worst now I feel better but the pain still continues. But what hurts me the most is the fact that my mom and dad have to go through with this. I want them to be happy but how can they when I am sick. Sometimes I literally thinks maybe I shouldn't tell them whenever something new happen regarding my stomach problem that I am having now.

Please dont drink alcohol please dont. It really really ruined my stomach. I dont want anyone else to suffer and go through what I am going through now. I stop drinking, my parents stop drinking and we dont even eat meat anymore. Just up to last year I was having steak n shake like every week. Now I only eat salads and other veggies. If you are someone who drinks or do drugs, please dont when it hits back at you it hits hard. I was feeling great for like 8 months and now my illness came back. I know it will be over soon but within these a few days, this is what I am going through and I'm be so thankful to the world and life after this is over and I feel good again.

Those of you who are not sick please be very thankful that you are well. Those of you who are sick be thankful that it could have been worse and you are fortune enough to not get it that bad and after this is over and you are well again, be very thankful that you feel better and treasure it.

How are you?

I was in panera bread having cheese cake and scone for afternoon snack. My mom was coming back from work and she picked me up in case the rain gets heavy, even though we dont live far from here and I could just walk by myself.

She change the radio channel to news and we heard that Kasich is not running anymore. Just last night less than 20 hours ago ted cruz canceled his campaign and now kasich canceled his run too. GOP is finished, this is a dark time for the republican party. Trump took everything now. We were speechless. We are not democrats but me and my mom want hillary to win.

Kasich is the guy my dad support, my dad wanted kasich to win even though like everyone else he knows the chance of kasich winning is very very thin.

Regardless of Hillary or that old jewish communist whatever his name. Regardless of whoever win democrat do you think they can beat donald trump? To be honest I'm a little scare of donald trump winning its not because I disagree with the things he say. But because I dont know what is real plans are, lets be honest theres no way he is going to build the wall, tax extra for each item that comes into the country by the "traitor" outsourced companies, hes not going to ban half of muslim travelers requesting to come to US. Its not going to happen he knows that president dont have that power to do any of those things. What scare me is that he is going to run 4 years without a plan he just want the title.

What about you what do you think?

I'm just going to wear a white long dress and wrap some toilet papers around my body. And put on a lot of dark eyeshadow. When people ask me what I am suppose to be? I'll just tell them I'm a ghost.

Maybe I'll put some alot of white powder or makeup too. But I am already very pale naturally, whatever maybe I'll put on some make up or powder to make myself more paler.

What are you going to dress as?

In some of old videos back when I was like 5 years old. Like back in 1999. When I was with relatives in gatherings like hanukkah or passover. I would put like a cup or some kind of object on my forehead. Then I would try to balance it and then I would slowly arch my back while pushing my hands left and right left and right into the air almost like dancing as I arch my back further until it fell off my forehead.

Theres also another thing that I did which I remember. I would put my head on the floor and my relatives are like look look whats she's doing its funny. But when I do it again they tell me to stop and that its dangerous. And my parents would try to stop me I remember when I do that.

But I don't remember me putting something on my forehead and arching my back while trying to balance it and pushing my hand left and right into the air.

Why did I do that as a baby? well not a baby but like little back then. Why?

And some cheese and bread but I stop eating after my neck got tight and I start to feel heavy headed. I don't have hypertension but my parents said its due to high blood pressure. I'm better now.

I am just glad it happen tonight instead of happening on the night that they allowed me to drink. I had my drinks last night. Last night my mom made me vermouth martini. One with a twist, one with dilled pickles, one with olives. And before I head to bed I asked my dad to make me a mohito and he made one for me with my white chardonnay. If I drink on tuesday they would usually let me drink again on friday. But because this high blood pressure thing happen to me, they probably will not let me drink until next week. What did you had for dinner?

Its 11 pm here in ohio, I should probably go to bed early tonight

I am a fan of disney's frozen even though its overrated and I don't often get into overrated things, I am a fan of Elsa.

I am a capricorn. In this video a goat is dressed as Elsa

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdJR58uDtXk

Me a capricorn and I am a fan of Elsa. And here a goat which represent the symbol of capricorn dressed as one of my favorite character. Could this be some kind of a supernatural massage for me?

Last year a jewish woman got drunk on purim. Women should not drunk on purim, and she got drunk. On this coming purim if she got to the event and the same people showed up and they remembered her from last year? What can she do to not make herself feel a bit too embarrassed?

Last saturday there was this woman who went to mccormick and schmicks with her mom and dad. She didn't even know that they are going there because they didn't told her that they made reservation. Her parents weren't going out because its valentines day, they just went out for some lunch and to be honest most people don't really "celebrate" valentines day these days.

And it was really cold here in ohio so people maybe just decides not to go out for it. They went to mccormick schmicks at easton town center. And to be fair there weren't late teens or young 20s who are around her age there. But there was a family there and that couple's kids are like 10 and 12. But here she is a 22 year old woman eating a lobster like as if she's a child that parents brought along.

And after that they look around Easton town center and she wanted to go to American girl store just to check new accessories for her American girl dolls. She have two but they are not custom because her mom and dad wont let her make custom dolls because they don't want her making a doll of herself. She decided not to go because they said they will come with her to that store which is embarrassing since its for little kids. If she goes there alone it would seems like she is buying for someone but if they come it will be like parents taking their daughter to a toy store. So instead she follow her parents shop around and then order a steak burger at steak n shake and go back home. Is she an embarrassing loser?

Today for brunch I had boars head's golden oven roast turkeyham half pound from giant eagle. I wanted to have it with a glass of barefoot red moscato. But I am not allowed to drink wine or beer when my parents are not at home. I am only allowed to drink them when they are at home. Also they don't allow me to use stove, oven, or kitchen knives without them nearby that's why I couldn't make a meal for myself and I had to go out and buy food.

Right now for late lunch or around afternoon snack, I am having aged reserved cracker barrel cheese with cranberry cocktail juice. I wanted to drink real wine a nice dry red wine like sauvgnion cabernet would good well with this cheese. Fine sour red wine with cheese aged and sharp. In fact the night before last night, I finished a quarter left bottle of sauvignon cabernet with this same cheese and enjoying the breeze of autumn night with window in my room open.

I wasn't allowed to drink wine yesterday because the day before I already drank. So that means I can drink tonight, I don't have sauvignon cabernet anymore but I think tonight I will have sherry or port with pretzel crips and tribes mediterranean olive hummus for late night snack. During dinner I think I will drink merlot if I don't drink during dinner I know I will drink vermouth as digestif after dinner.

But for now this cranberry juice a little sour is good with this cheese too.

What about you what did you had for lunch?

I usually have dream of seeing Elsa or Anna or any Disney Frozen reference for a while now. But rarely do I dream about interaction with Elsa and even when I do, most of the time the dream changes. Like you know in your dreams when the events, setting and people changes into another dream and the person you are with either disappeared or turned into another person and conversation changes but you adapt to it in your dream like as if this new event in the dream was the original and that this is how it's always been.

When this time in my dream Elsa didn't disappear for a while, at least it feels like she didn't disappear for a while. I don't remember other parts of my dream but from what I farking remembered either I was back at east coast or I was back at the apartment I used to lived back when I was in east coast. But the home is my current house and Elsa along with some other people came to visit like it was a special gathering or event. Although she is a cartoon character she talk like a normal person I don't remembered what we were talking about. I told her ya everyone in my school is golden bears people go to OSU with atheletic scholarships, and she's like oh thats good thats good.

Then I was at what appears to be disney world but in my dream its a hometown. And I went on farking expedition everest but it was actually materhorn ride from disney park. Shes not there in this part anymore after I left the house. Whats the meaning of my dream?

I am drinking lambursco and was. just was bugging my parents a little. They more are drunk then me. They drinking scotch was just bugging them by rubbing my head on dad my head on my dad arm like cat. Then bite him but not hurting. Just biting a little eh told me to stop and I. did wasnt mad at me then now I bite my mom made her drop her glass and they yellowing at me saying I cant drink anymore to night.

I was laying on their lap my legs on my dad and ym upper body on my mom laps. She was padding myhead. rubbing hair relax me. Then I bit her elbows wasnt hurting her. They said the glass almost broke made I made her drop. Car pet needs to be clean now I made her spill it. And yelling at me say ing I cant drink anymore tonight. Saying they wont let me agian this week and that I am not all owed to buy anyore wines.

almost 2 am here in ohio I cant sleep happy knowing they are angry atme

I swear I am not making this up. I look younger than I really am. At least by 4 or 5 years, for some people I look even younger than that. Past few days my consumption of alcoholic beverages have increased and me drinking water is much less. Past few days, I havent slept as much as before.

When I look at myself in the mirror I ve seen to aged a little. Sometimes I feel that I ve aged but recent days I ve been drinking more than I had past months. I mean for a while now, I ve been aware that I am not as fair and pale as I was years ago and my skin isnt as smooth and delicate like how i was back in my younger years. But my face havent really changed even though the tone and the texture have. But within these days my face seem more noticeable to aging. I have a feeling it have to do with alcohol but the thing is I ve only increased in my drinking for about two weeks, and I thought it takes more than this and more alcohol content to take noticeable effect in your aging.

What do you think is the cause of it?

People who wears fit dress or tight abaya. Do you think Elsa's coronation dress, the one with teal over black tight dress, don't you think it will make a real nice abaya? You know the scene when she run up the crystal ice stairs that she created, signing "I'm one with the wind and sky" and when she ascended to the top she did that little spin like "you'll never see me cry". When she did that spin you can see both front and the back of that dress and it looks really nice. Only problem is it would be embarrassing to wear it in public because it would be like wearing a costume since it was from a disney movie. But do you still agree that Elsa dress would make a good abaya?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk

There's this woman who have four guy friends who are at college close to her town. But she is not in that university she is still in high school but have some friends who goes to that university because some of them were friends with her in high school and they graduated while she got leftback.

During spring recess her boyfriends went back home to be with their family. But one guy stayed, and last week she went out with him twice. Does this count as her being unfair and spending more time with one person? Also two of her boyfriends don't know that she also date other guys, including this guy that she had a date with twice last week. He's 19 and was in her school two years ago but graduated.

Is it still considered cheating even though there never was a real relationship, and even if they found it's not like they would even mind. But is it unfair of her to just date one guy whole week while the other three were away?

In my dream I was still living in east coast like how I was before I moved. But in that dream the state university of the city I currently live in was there. Me and my uncle were trying to buy bagels? Remembered seeing bagels but not sure what we were trying to order. Then I told him that we should write it down so that I won't forget. Then the dream changes and now instead of my uncle it was one of my friends who graduated a year ago. She and I were in some kind of an art gallery or science concert, and for some reason there was a stand where they sell olives and stuffed olive leaf rolls.

She was saying that she already got the tickets and that she and her friends are going to somewhere. And she said but certain someone name, that person will not be going with them. In my dream I had this feeling that she was indirectly referring to me like mocking me. Then there's this invisible unseen "person" or "someone" that usually appears in my dreams, that person was telling me that my dad wouldn't like it if I buy it. Not talking about the ticket that my friend was talking about. And that if I want I should ask my parents permission first.

Then I was in a castle, but that castle is mcdonalds possibly head quarter. There's a room there that, this unseen person is protecting me from. I didn't go in there but I was let know that there "was" a shadow person in that area. I didn't go in but that companion of mine let me know without telling me. Then my dream changes again

What if you get drunk on purim. What if a 21 year old got drunk on purim but she looks young and people possible that people mistaken her for a teenager who got hold of alcohol. And telling her parents like "your daughter sure can drink" . And perhaps you unintentionally embarrassed your parents. And dancing with boys.

What do you think of people who gets drunk on purim

If your parents won't let you drunk wine on week days and only let you drunk on every other weekend because they think you are not responsible, what can you do to regain their trust? Your mom and dad try to train you to drink responsibly by letting you drink only on the week ends, then about a month later when you've been following the rule they trust you enough to let you drink on week days like after dinner and small glass before going to bed.

Then they think you are starting to abuse it and wont let you drink on weekdays anymore and put you back to the rule of drinking only once every other weekend. What can you do to earn back their trust asap so you can drink on weekdays afternoons again.

You want so bad after dinner. You just want to have a glass of port wine or sherry to help you digest and relax. And a glass before bed so you can have a nice sleep. But your mom and dad now only let you drink on weekends. How can you earn back their trust asap and first what can you do to satisfy your thirst for now?

I am almost 21 I used to drink alcohol but I don't drink often anymore due to stomach problems. But when I do I no longer abuse it. Recently an associate of my mom gave her a bottle vintage whisky. They been hiding it from me. They think I am trying to abuse it but I'm not. I just want to taste it a little but they won't let me. They think that I will ask for more and if I don't get it I will get violent. How do I convince them?

Also they are always planning against me

I am going to be 21 during this school year. But most people don't know because I'm in that age range when people can't tell if you are a teen or someone in their early 20s. Only some people who were in my classes in previous years know that I've been getting leftback. Maybe because it's only been my 2nd week of school, but I feel weird attending class with people younger than me. How do I encourage myself?