Janineisacoolsouthernchick

What would you want people to do for you to lift your spirits while going thru chemo? I just found out someone I know is dying (most likely) and I want to do something nice for them but I don't know what to do. Any suggestions? Just a little about this person--they are a career Marine (retired from the Corps), older, from SC originally...just makes you realize how precious life is.

With my 1st child, they typed his blood when he was born. However, they did not do this with my 2nd child and I just wondered when/how I'd be able to find out her blood type

Thanks.

My baby is 2 months old so I know I'll have to wait several months yet before I know what her eye color will be (right now they are sort of a brown color) but I was curious if anyone knows...if the father's eyes are hazel (green and blue) and my eyes are hazel (brown and green) what color are my child's eyes likely to be?

Any answers appreciated. Thanks!

Ok...I have a married friend who recently got pregnant and had a baby. The biological father of the baby is not her husband. Her husband actually had a vasectomy 10 years ago and it's a matter of public record (the state paid for the surgery). In this case, the bio dad refuses to take any responsibility for the child and as a result this woman listed her husband as the legal father of the baby on its birth certificate, even though he is almost certainly not the bio dad (and obviously knows he isn't). In the state where the couple resides, a married woman who has a baby doesn't even have the option to list a man other than her husband on the birth certificate (she can only either list her husband as the dad or refuse to name the father at all). I'm not sure if she even has the legal option to go after a man who isn't her husband for child support, given that she can't put him on the BC...

It got me thinking that here is a situation where the bio dad has no given legal rights to his own child. From what I've been able to surmise on-line, the only way the bio dad in a situation like this can legally be recognized as the father is if the husband goes to court to have his name taken off the birth certificate (and can prove he isn't the bio dad) or if the child in question petitions the court to have the birth certicate changed because the legal father is not the bio father (and they only have until they are 18 to do so). Even if the bio dad can petition to have the BC changed (maybe he can? I'm not a lawyer), it seems like the mother should at least be able to list a different father for her child at birth, if she wants to, even if to do so, she had to prove her husband isn't the father of her baby.

I think I have an idea why the law is written this way (perhaps to try and protect the family unit) but it bothers me. Why must so much hinge on a woman's marital status? To me it seems to harken back to the days when wives were property, ergo any children that a woman has are assumed to be her husband's...and it seems unfair to the bio dad (though some men would probably be glad not to be obligated for child support and wouldn't care).

In my friend's situation (where the bio dad doesn't want to be involved with the baby and would likely sign over his legal rights voluntarily if he had any) it works out ok...but I can't help thinking about situations where maybe the bio dad didn't even know the mother was married and wants to be involved with the baby.

When I was growing up and that song "All I Want to do is make Love to you" came out, I was appaulled because if you listen the words, the song is about a married woman who goes out and has sex with some random guy just so she can have a kid, without telling the guy what her intentions are, etc. Is anyone else with me that these laws are antiquated and need some reconsideration?

I had a kid 4 weeks ago...my post pardom bleeding lasted about 3 weeks and then stopped...but now suddenly after 3 or 4 days of not bleeding, I'm spotting...is this normal? I surely can't be having my period yet right? Just wondered. Hopefully someone out there can help me answer this question. Thanks to all who reply.

When a man denies paternity of his children (at this point it's 2 children by two different women, one when he was 18 and one now that he is 25), even knowing that he had unprotected sex with the women in question during the time that they conceived and therefore could very well be the father, are the children (in your opinion) simply better off with out having such a man proven to be the father if another man is willing to step and take responsibility, even knowing for sure that the children are not biologically theirs?

For those who maybe have prior experience with someone like this/a situation like this, I'm just trying to understand the psychology of a man who would do this. To me, it's one thing to think you might not be the father and want proof before taking responsibility, especially if you suspect the woman has not been monogamous with you during the time she conceived...ok, that's perfectly reasonable since some women do lie about that kind of thing...but to outright deny any possibility that the child is yours and walk away from the woman and child like nothing happened...I just don't get it. Does the fact that the man in question was abandoned/denied by his own biological father make this behavior any more understandable? Wouldn't you think someone like that would care all the more about wanting to be a good father, knowing the pain of being a child whose father refuses to acknowledge him?

Any comments or advice appreciated...

Someone just did something really, really mean to me. This particular person is a real loser and will most likely have a miserable life anyway but for those who have exacted revenge before, was it as sweet as you'd hoped? For those who haven't, did karma eventually punish that person anyway? Tell me your story. Thanks!

My son is 12 and I'm about to have a daughter...does anyone else have children spaced this far apart, and if so, would you say it was a positive experience? Did the children bond as they got older? Or perhaps someone out there has a sibling that is 12 years older or younger than them and can offer some perspective on that big of a space between children? Just wondered what kind of issues (if any) I may want to expect since I know it's unusual for first and second children to have that much of an age gap between them. Thanks!

To start, I'm 32 weeks and some change pregnant with my 2nd child...I went to the ER a week ago because I was having abdominal pain and pain in my back. They kept me overnight, wouldn't let me eat any solid foods because they weren't sure if it was my appendix causing my pain. Friday morning they still had me on a liquid diet (I went 38 hours without eating solid food and was ready to kill by the time it was over). Friday afternoon they determined my appendix was ok and it was a urinary tract infection causing my symptoms and they released me, telling me to follow up with my regular OB/GYN. They gave me 3 treatments of anti biotics while I was there but didn't send me home with any sort of follow up medication.

Since then I've been having vaginal irritation (the whole area feels raw and irritated) and occasional burning when I pee...and yesterday there was just the teeniest amount of blood once when I wiped myself after urinating (the blood was after my doctor's appt so I didn't tell them about that but I did tell them about the irritation and they said it was normal and should go away, but they didn't give me any kind of time frame on when)...my doctor took a urine sample and they say they will test it to see if the infection is still present but it will take a few days to know. If the infection is still there, they are supposed to call in a anti-biotic prescription for me. So far I haven't heard anything back yet.

But, if I'm correct in thinking that my infection is not gone, am I right to be angry with the hospital for releasing me with out sending me home with any sort of follow up treatment, just assuming it would be ok and if it wasn't that it could wait until my next doctor's appointment for a follow-up? I'm reading online that UTIs can cause premature labor and it just seems like they should've done more to make sure the infection was definitely gone, given that the consequences of it not being gone could be serious (I realize that the baby would most likely survive if it were born this early but there would be of course be risks of delivering this early and I want my baby to be as healthy as possible).

I had planned to deliver at the particular hospital I went to initially for treatment but now I'm thinking I should consider going to another hospital. Honestly, I'm angry and feeling distrustful after they starved me and then seemed to be taking such a casual attitude about my health at this difficult time. Unfortunately, the next closest hospital is 45 miles away and I'm not familiar with it. Nothing's to say it would be better, but I have heard lots of bad things about the hospital I've already been to...(then again when I had my first child, I had heard a lot of bad things about that hospital too but I had a pretty good birthing experience there)

Am I right to be freaking out or am I just overreacting, maybe because I'm pregnant, maybe because I'm having to deal with this stupid infection which is very uncomfortable?

Any advice would be appreciated from other women who've been there themselves or people who maybe have known someone in a similar situation.

Thanks!

To start, I'm 7 months pregnant with a daughter (my first daughter, I already have a son). I've been an ardent feminist since I was a teenager and now that I'm having a daughter, I feel all the more inspired on the subject...I'm thinking about what I can do to help fight negative gender stereotypes...ways I can show her and explain to her why sexism is so damaging so that she can fight it in her own life...

On to my question...this lead me to do some reading. I recently read a biography by Ayaan Hirsi Ali (I don't have time to explain who she is in this post...if you haven't heard of her, look her up and find out who she is for yourself) in which she talks about the oppression women routinely suffer in the countries where she grew up (like Sudan and Saudi Arabia)...it really got me thinking about how relatively good women in the western world (Europe, America, etc) have it. Of course sexism is still an issue but at least we have legal rights here that women in other parts of the world can only dream of...do we women then have a responsibility to try to improve things for all women all over the world? For example, couldn't we lobby our gov't(s) to impose trade sanctions on countries that atill allow women to be forced into marriages against their will or countries where girls are denied an education simply because they are female?

Thanks for your opinion! :-)

PS--Men who care about equal rights for women are free to comment on this question too...I'm not really interested in hearing from men (or women) who don't care about women's rights or have some big beef with feminism in general...

I am A+ (my father is O-, mother is A+), the baby's father is AB+ (not sure about his parents). I was just curious. Thanks to all who respond!

Savanna

Rose

Fern

Lea

Jaymes

Dawn

Liberty

Thanks for your input! :-)

Kyra (pronounced like Keira) Liberty

Ok, I will preface this by stating that I have been having a lot of issues with my boyfriend lately. I suspect this dream is trying to tell me that he is a pathological liar...tell me what you think.

Ok, I had a dream last night that I was making out with a woman but when I went to go down on her, she turned out to be a man with not just one but two penises. Then suddenly it was my boyfriend.

Later in the dream, he and were living together and discovered a raccoon in the bathtub. We put it in the backyard only to discover there was a family of raccoons living out there (our house was up in a tree for some reason), not to mention a myriad of other animals (sloths, squirrels, and other small tree climbing mammals, though, I know raccoons don't climb trees do they?).

Are these animals to represent problems that my bf and I are having that I am trying to ignore but they keep popping up anyway? And what it could it mean that I dreamed he had two penises?

Ok, I am currently living with my father. I just moved in with him a month ago and we haven't lived together since I was a teenager (I am 31 now). Anyway, I dreamed that there were alligators in our yard. One of them had no head, just a body but it was still thrashing around. So, I am outside and scared that I am going to get attacked by these animals so I run in to tell my dad, hoping he will protect me. Instead, I discover that he is in there frying up bacon to feed to the alligators and instead of trying to help me, he gets annoyed with me because I interupted him while he was cooking.

What could it possibly mean? Any guesses will be appreciated. Thanks!!!

What could the person who cheated on you do to make you feel better? Anything? What makes some people forgive this and others just walk away? Did it make you feel better to know that the person was in agony over what they did or were you inconsolable? I am a horrible, horrible person. I hope someone out there can give me some helpful advice to feel better, even though I don't feel I deserve to feel better.

Thanks.

:-(

I just got dumped yesterday...got my heart shattered actually. I feel so hollowed out and betrayed, I can't stand it. The thing is, I don't deal well with being alone. I've pretty much had a husband or a boyfriend non-stop since I was 12 years old. I know that probably is why I've made some bad choices so I'm thinking I should give myself time to enjoy being single. Very hard to think about but I know it's the right ting to do.

However, it's hard for me to imagine being alone for very long. I guess I'm just too needy or maybe enjoy having someone to take care of. Anyway, what is a decent waiting period after a painful break up (long enough to heal but not so long that I'll become desperate for companionship) in your experience? A month? Six months? A year? Do you think it's a good idea for me to purposefully wait a long time since I have spent so much of my life (20 years) bouncing from one failed relationship to another? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

My husband (whom I have been separated from for the past 10 months) has recently been arrested and is being held on a $2500 bond. It would cost around $400 to bail him out and I don't have it to spare.

He is accused of striking a 3 year old child. I suspect the charges are bs (the person accusing him is not trustworthy and has reasons for trying to hurt my ex and I've never known my ex to be violent) but I can't be sure since I wasn't there and my ex does have a bit of a temper.

Anyway...he is wanting me to try to bail him out, but so far, I haven't done a thing to try and get him bailed out. I don't want to ask my family for help either. Plus, he was arrested at least 3 times during our marriage (for different offenses) and frankly I'm tired of bailing him out every time he gets in another dumbass jam...yet I feel guilty because we have a child together and I know my son hurts to know his father is in jail. Am I feeling guilty for nothing or should I feel bad?

I am not trying to conceive at this time but that may be changing within the next year or two and I have a question...

If you're a female with a relatively short cycle (say 23 or 24 days instead of 28), does this mean you are more fertile than a woman with a longer cycle (more likely to get pregnant) or less fertile or is there even a difference? If your cycle is shorter, does that generally mean you have fewer fertile days to work with in a given cycle?

I was just wondering. Usually my cycle is between 26 and 28 days but sometimes it is only 23 or 24 days. I don't remember it being this way when I was younger but it's been this way the last few years, off and on (I'm 31 now).

Just wondering if the shorter cycles means I'm more fertile now than I used to be or less.

Thanks to all who can give me some information about this!