?

I came from a dysfunctional family. My family is split. I had problems with mom and always had conflicts and I psychically assaulted my mother and taunted her. Like -wise my mother had done the same to me. my mother is verbally abusive.

Recently I moved back to mom and my mom feeds me, and lets me stay in her place. Pays for my phone bill and also offers financial help. Im forever grateful but my mom provokes me and i been reacting in an hurtful manner to the point of my mom crying recently.

i feel guilty and i realized i am 20 and i need to be kind to my mom as my mom get older, there is no point pointing fingers, my mom will not change who she is, so i want to make it up to her and be kind as possible.

Its hard because I Have been like this for long time. How do i take care of my mom and be kind even if she is not nice.

Jesus said that if you lust inside your already committing adultery. i get erections like when im on computer or at school and when im at home sometimes i just masturbate and look at pornography.

Also i sometimes see beautiful girl and start to lust.

I want to stay pure and serve god not the devil. IM 15yr old guy.