Sabine É

at doctors appointments, dental appointments?

It's not that I don't want to go alone (well, yeah-- that's kind of it.) I have no family or friends in the area, so I find him a comfort when I have to do things like that. I feel alone a lot anyway.

Thankfully, I rarely need to see either, so the few times I do, he might be 1 hour late for work, or leave a little early to go with me two or three times a year at most. Also, when I do need medical care, I'm a usually sick or in pain so it's nice for him to be there for me.

(His work is very flexible about that kind of thing so it doesn't impact his job.)

He doesn't mind, and is more than willing to accommodate me.

Do other people do this too?

Been together 2 years (not living together) and things are great. We're both over 40.

A while back he joined one of those high school reunion sites (like classmates.com) because he saw one of his old friends (a male) listed and they got in touch.

Recently, a woman contacted him and said over the years, despite being married, she thought of him often. He didn't remember her, even after looking at the yearbook photos. She's single now, and over the course of a few email exchanges, asked him to "meet for coffee" when she visits our area. (She doesn't live around here anymore.)

He's really looking forward to connecting and talking about "old times" and thinks it's all very innocent and friendly. I think he's even flattered to think someone is "interested" in him.

I'm saying-- an older single woman contacting her high school crush and saying "I've thought of you over the years" and wanting to meet means she's looking for something more.

He said she posted a recent photo on the site, and he doesn't even think she's attractive at all, and it's just "old school friends" meeting. I say-- sure, that's true from his point of view, but I believe she has more on her mind than that!

Also, I kind of "invited" myself to go with him (as a joke-- I'd never do that) but it was obvious he wouldn't want me to go.

I trust him of course. But I just wonder why he'd bother. Why bother to meet some women he doesn't even remember to talk about high school, isn't interested in, who lives in another state? What's the point of that?

Opinions?

Where do you go to find a new family?

I need to make friends to replace my blood relatives, who I've come to realize are unhealthy and dysfunctional.

How do you do that?

The church I used to go to isn't the right place for me. I'm not sure about religion these days.

I used to be involved in a "social club" but the people were horrible LOL

Also, it seems like everyone else already has family and friends, so it's not easy.

Where else?

How do you build a network of people like family?

We had a bad fight last week and kind of broke up, but toward the end he was saying something like, "I know this will all blow over and things will be back to normal. I hope I'm not wrong."

During these last few days, we've been emailing like we usually do, but not about what happened. I emailed to say I felt bad, and that I'd said things to him I regret. (He didn't respond to those specific emails i.e., address the issue, but he did send some other romantic things, like he normally does.)

On the same day every week, we ALWAYS talk in the morning (at the same time) and get to together that night. It's been our thing for almost a year.

Should I email to ask (in a cute way) if he's planning to call me (so he knows I'd like things to be back to normal)... or should I just wait and see if he's calls on his own?

( He's the one who *always* calls on that specific day. It's our thing, so I wouldn't call him.)

I know we both want to get over things, but I want HIM to take the next step. I guess I'm really wondering if I should trust him to want us to continue as normal?

Email or wait for him to be the man?

My friend's son (and his wife), whom I've never met, are traveling to our state this summer and will have their new baby baptized at the local church where he and his family "grew up".

There will be a luncheon at my friend's house to celebrate following the church service.

Like I said- I've never met them and I probably won't seem them again (or if I do, it will be possibly once every 2 years or so).

But out of respect for the "grandmother" who is my friend-- what's proper?

Do I bring a baby gift? A card?

I am under a huge amount of stress in general right now, and meanwhile have to totally clear out the dump of a kitchen so it can be remodeled. I'll need giant bags of trash, boxes for donations, boxes for storage and boxes for things like food and dishes we use.

I'm doing all the work myself, naturally! My husband wouldn't dream of helping me pack up, much less 92 heavy boxes down 2 flights of stairs to the garage. No way!

All I asked him for was a roll of packing tape for the boxes. That's it.

So he brings home duct tape.

Is he passive-aggressive or just an idiot??

He does that crap all the time. I'll ask him to pick up laundry soap on his way home and he'll bring home a bottle of fabric softener.

Is he passive-aggressive or just an idiot??

For someone sooo intelligent, he can't read a &^^%#@ LABEL.

So now I have a mere 4 days to get the entire kitchen done and can't do anything because I have no *&^%@# packing tape. Oh and he wants to know what I'm planning to cook for dinner tonight!

Is he passive-aggressive or just an idiot?

would you use a primer first if the wall is currently painted a bright green?

Right now it's kind of like this

http://www.thehumanrubberband.com/lime%20green.JPG only not quite so bright.

The new paint color is called "mushroom bisque"--here it is:

http://www.homedepot.com/catalog/productImages/300...

should I prime over the green first or no need to bother?

My truffle recipe calls for 8 oz. of unsweetened baker’s chocolate. I accidentally bought semi-sweet chocolate. (the recipe also uses 1 cup of powdered sugar)

Is the semi-sweet going to be too much? Using unsweetened made the truffles "bittersweet" which was nice. Will semi-sweet make THAT big of a difference? Because I don't want them overly sweet.

(not sure if I want/need to take it back to the store and exchange it)

My hubs is a bit of a pack rat.

He has half a closet full of 20 year old clothes that will never fit (or be back in style), stacks of magazines he hasn't read in 10 years, cupboards full of junky old dishes, pans and mugs, shoes coated in dust, 15 year old skis, etc. I even found an old, broken clock radio under the bed! The problem is, there's so much junk, we haven't even unpacked our wedding gifts from years ago. There's so much crap, we can't put away or use the nice things we own.

After 10 years, I can't take it anymore. I asked nicely for a few years now to sort through the stuff together but he never would. Lately the clutter has started to make me edgy and irritable, and feels like I'm smothering.

Can clutter in the house make you feel crazy?

My hubs is a bit of a pack rat.

He has half a closet full of 20 year old clothes that will never fit (or be back in style), stacks of magazines he hasn't read in 10 years, cupboards full of junky old dishes, pans and mugs, shoes coated in dust, 15 year old skis, etc. I even found an old, broken clock radio under the bed! The problem is, there's so much junk, we haven't even unpacked our wedding gifts from years ago. There's so much crap, we can't put away or use the nice things we own.

After 10 years, I can't take it anymore. I asked nicely for a few years now to sort through the stuff together but he never would. Lately the clutter has started to make me edgy and irritable, and feels like I'm smothering.

Can clutter in the house make you feel crazy?

What would you prefer to hear from the woman you're dating who's crazy about you ?

I want you

I need you

I miss you

I love you

Which one makes you most excited and happy?

Ok, yes I'm on a diet, but I've been eating light for the past 2 days. But yeah.. trying to drop a few pounds.

Anyway, tonight's my big TV night-- all my programs are on and I'm looking forward to a couch potato evening.

But on Friday night we're going dancing. I always paint my nails for dancing but this time it's different:

1- it's just the two of us this time, and my husband doesn't notice.

2- I have a lot of cleaning and moving to do over the weekend so my manicure would get beat up anyway.

So.. tonight-- do my nails or make a batch of popcorn? Try to squeeze in both and re-do them again on Monday?

My Eureka vacuum was about 12 years old when it broke yesterday. I had just done the living room, which has a Berber-style carpet.

So I got a new vacuum (a Bissell CleanView Helix Bagless) and just because I happened to be in the living room, I tried it out. WOW-- the canister was almost half full!

It's kind of gross to think I had been vacuuming and yet leaving behind mass quantities of dirt.

Was my old vacuum THAT ineffective???

I have a figure like Christina Hendricks, who's on the TV show Mad Men.

Here's a picture in case you don't know her:

http://news.makemeheal.com/images/christina-hendri...

I'm maybe a tad thinner and LIKE my figure, but I've had at least 2 people comment about my "weight" and "size"- things like--- "don't feel bad about your size" and "you've always had issues with your weight, haven't you?"

I don't get it. It makes me wonder if other people are "feeling sorry" for me being so "big".

I dress beautifully, work out often, feel very womanly and actually have slender legs and arms. My "curves" are around my hips, butt and boobs.

Why these comments about my weight and size? They're from people who I know care about me, so it's kind of weird that they are trying to "reassure" me.

What do you think?

They constantly say hurtful and insensitive things and/or make sarcastic comments. They're always getting little digs in about your life- your house, your hobbies, your hair, your work, etc. When you bring it to their attention and tell them what they said hurt, they always respond with:

You're too sensitive

I was only kidding

You take everything the wrong way

I never said that

I don't remember saying that

No matter how hurtful or rude their words, it's never their fault and you're always wrong for being upset. What do you think of someone who does that?

They constantly say hurtful and insensitive things and/or make sarcastic comments. They're always getting little digs in about your life- your house, your hobbies, your hair, your work, etc. When you bring it to their attention and tell them what they said hurt, they always respond with:

You're too sensitive

I was only kidding

You take everything the wrong way

I never said that

I don't remember saying that

No matter how hurtful or rude their words, it's never their fault and you're always wrong for being upset. What do you think of someone who does that?

I have just realized that my mother has been as emotionally abusive toward me as her husband was (who was not my father). He was always screaming, threatening, and bullying-- verbal assaults.

But now through therapy, I have realized my mother was and still is just as bad but in different ways--- invalidating, rejecting, denying, minimizing, neglecting

When I brought this to her attention, first she denied it, but now she is ignoring me. (Two of her typical behaviors that I'm very familiar with!)

My husband and therapist say I need to minimize her involvement in my life. I will do that. I don't want to talk to her but right now I'm so angry at her for her "silent treatment".

Has anyone experienced anything similar?

I'm hosting a charity dinner on July 18th.

The dinner costs $50 and all proceeds go to charity

When -- how soon-- should I send out invitations in order to sell tickets?

I'm bringing drinks to a part for about 100 people. I'll bring the usual sodas (2 liter bottles). How many do you think I'll need?

He's always been flirty and fun and we've been close acquaintances for going on 2 years. He's always paid me compliments and been very flirty.

I know I've gained some weight recently (7 pounds, maybe more). Last night I was wearing a skirt that made me look a little hippy and I did feel bloated.

He said "Hey voluptuous" and I said, kind of joking, "Are you saying I've gained weight?" and he appeared to be at a loss for words. Then the moment passed and nothing more was said.

Opinions?