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started this a little less than a week ago, so it may still sound a little rough... here goes, hope you enjoy:

Depression, love, and everything inbetween

Darcy sat, soaking apple slices in a jar of honey, letting the strings of honey fall on the table as she reached to take a bite. Silence, tension thick in the air. Thats how it's been, ever since... the pill incident. Now that I think back on it, the house has been tense before Darcy tried to overdose on her depression pills. Weren't they supposed to help her? Weren't they supposed to make her happy? Weren't they supposed to make her cheerful once again? Weren't they supposed to make her normal? Normal enough to want to talk about school and boys with me again? No, they made her want to chug them down, with vodka, pill after pill,after pill.

Lucky enough I got to her in time. Lucky, in the pit of my heart, I felt the need to go home early.My stomach was filled with uneasiness.The feeling that something wasn't right. So, I called mother, told her I would walk home. Got there in time, to see the mass of my sisters body on the couch and to see a empty vodka bottle, and a container of scheduled pills, that should've lasted her the week, a week's worth of pills, gone, in one day. I didn't think, didn't freeze to the spot, I ran right to the phone, to call for help.

911, I dialed with shaky fingers, as soon as the ringing stopped, I talked into the mouth peice as if my life depended on it. It did actually, Since I had no life without Darcy. She was my life. She had always came before me. Even though, being 2 years younger, I have never stopped taking care of her, making sure she wasokay. Begging her to let me know, anytime she thought she couldn't deal with the world's bull **** anymore, to let me know, that I would help her get through it. But she hadn't let me know today.The day she decided to take a weeks worth of pills. I have never been without her, if I were to let her die now, I would spiritually, mentally and emotionally go along with her.

"I think she's dead. My sister, Help!"

"9-1-1. What is your emergency?" the voice on the other end replied calmly, just pissing me off. How can she be so calm when someone could be dying? How could she be so calm when someone could be wasting away on the other line of the phone?

"Are you not understanding me? Send an amublance NOW!" I demanded, "She needs help, she overdosed! 3214 Ranbir Drive, send us help as soon as you can! She's dying!"

Calmly the operator replied, "Help is on the way," and I felt an urge to scream in her face, to demand her to be fearful and terrified, along with me.

I noticed I said us. We both needed help. We needed help, I didn't think anyone was capable of giving. Not mom or dad. Not a pill or a doctor. Not even a therapist.

I guess that was her job, to stay calm, But my world was caving in. I wanted others to be frightened and freaked out along with me.I wanted others to panic and run for cover with me.To let me know I'm not alone. I'm not the only one.

I held her head in my lap, being so out of control , I could only whisper "You were supposed to tell me. Tell me when you couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to know. I could've been here for you. Please don't die sissy. We can get through this, You and me, the way it's always been, together". I held her hand. It was clammy and sticky with sweat. I moved her hair from her face, and tucked it behind her ear, the way she always wore it. Her hair was tangled from not being combed all weekend. I couldsmell the liquoron her, makingme sick to my stomach.

Faintly I could hear a siren few blocks away, I said "Their coming , sissy, you just have to hold on, a little longer, just a little bit longer" comforting her, hoping she wasn't already gone, too scared and in shock to think about checking her pulse.

All the moments she was there for me, my first boyfriend, my first breakup, when I broke my wrist and when I got a shard of glass the legnth of your pinky, stuck in my foot. While the doctors pulled it out she was there holding my hand. Now it was my turn to hold hers, And I wouldn't let go. I could'nt grasp how life would be without her.

When The sirens was merely a few streets away, I hopped up and opened the door. I waited for them to come and save Darcy, Save us both.

--------------------------------------…

And if any of you want the second chapter, you can ask and i'll have no trouble putting the link of

started this a little less than a week ago, so it may still sound a little rough... here goes, hope you enjoy:

Depression, love, and everything inbetween

Darcy sat, soaking apple slices in a jar of honey, letting the strings of honey fall on the table as she reached to take a bite. Silence, tension thick in the air. Thats how it's been, ever since... the pill incident. Now that I think back on it, the house has been tense before Darcy tried to overdose on her depression pills. Weren't they supposed to help her? Weren't they supposed to make her happy? Weren't they supposed to make her cheerful once again? Weren't they supposed to make her normal? Normal enough to want to talk about school and boys with me again? No, they made her want to chug them down, with vodka, pill after pill,after pill.

Lucky enough I got to her in time. Lucky, in the pit of my heart, I felt the need to go home early.My stomach was filled with uneasiness.The feeling that something wasn't right. So, I called mother, told her I would walk home. Got there in time, to see the mass of my sisters body on the couch and to see a empty vodka bottle, and a container of scheduled pills, that should've lasted her the week, a week's worth of pills, gone, in one day. I didn't think, didn't freeze to the spot, I ran right to the phone, to call for help.

911, I dialed with shaky fingers, as soon as the ringing stopped, I talked into the mouth peice as if my life depended on it. It did actually, Since I had no life without Darcy. She was my life. She had always came before me. Even though, being 2 years younger, I have never stopped taking care of her, making sure she wasokay. Begging her to let me know, anytime she thought she couldn't deal with the world's bull **** anymore, to let me know, that I would help her get through it. But she hadn't let me know today.The day she decided to take a weeks worth of pills. I have never been without her, if I were to let her die now, I would spiritually, mentally and emotionally go along with her.

"I think she's dead. My sister, Help!"

"9-1-1. What is your emergency?" the voice on the other end replied calmly, just pissing me off. How can she be so calm when someone could be dying? How could she be so calm when someone could be wasting away on the other line of the phone?

"Are you not understanding me? Send an amublance NOW!" I demanded, "She needs help, she overdosed! 3214 Ranbir Drive, send us help as soon as you can! She's dying!"

Calmly the operator replied, "Help is on the way," and I felt an urge to scream in her face, to demand her to be fearful and terrified, along with me.

I noticed I said us. We both needed help. We needed help, I didn't think anyone was capable of giving. Not mom or dad. Not a pill or a doctor. Not even a therapist.

I guess that was her job, to stay calm, But my world was caving in. I wanted others to be frightened and freaked out along with me.I wanted others to panic and run for cover with me.To let me know I'm not alone. I'm not the only one.

I held her head in my lap, being so out of control , I could only whisper "You were supposed to tell me. Tell me when you couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to know. I could've been here for you. Please don't die sissy. We can get through this, You and me, the way it's always been, together". I held her hand. It was clammy and sticky with sweat. I moved her hair from her face, and tucked it behind her ear, the way she always wore it. Her hair was tangled from not being combed all weekend. I couldsmell the liquoron her, makingme sick to my stomach.

Faintly I could hear a siren few blocks away, I said "Their coming , sissy, you just have to hold on, a little longer, just a little bit longer" comforting her, hoping she wasn't already gone, too scared and in shock to think about checking her pulse.

All the moments she was there for me, my first boyfriend, my first breakup, when I broke my wrist and when I got a shard of glass the legnth of your pinky, stuck in my foot. While the doctors pulled it out she was there holding my hand. Now it was my turn to hold hers, And I wouldn't let go. I could'nt grasp how life would be without her.

When The sirens was merely a few streets away, I hopped up and opened the door. I waited for them to come and save Darcy, Save us both.

--------------------------------------…

And if you want heres the link to the second chapter, i like it better :

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

What would you name a book about a girl with depression? The title right now is Consuming darkness, but I think thats too overrated and common sounding.

her name is Darcy, shes 15 her sisters name is Zoey and she's 13...

Darcy tried to comit suicde.. heres the introduction/ first chapter, if you need it.

Darcy sat, soaking apple slices in a jar of honey, letting the strings of honey fall on the table as she reached to take a bite. Silence, tension thick in the air. Thats how it's been, ever since... the pill incident. Now that I think back on it, the house has been tense before Darcy tried to overdose on her depression pills. Weren't they supposed to help her? Weren't they supposed to make her happy? Weren't they supposed to make her cheerful once again? Weren't they supposed to make her normal? Normal enough to want to talk about school and boys with me again? No, they made her want to chug them down, with vodka, pill after pill,after pill.

Lucky enough I got to her in time. Lucky, in the pit of my heart, I felt the need to go home early.My stomach was filled with uneasiness.The feeling that something wasn't right. So, I called mother, told her I would walk home. Got there in time, to see the mass of my sisters body on the couch and to see a empty vodka bottle, and a container of scheduled pills, that should've lasted her the week, a week's worth of pills, gone, in one day. I didn't think, didn't freeze to the spot, I ran right to the phone, to call for help.

911, I dialed with shaky fingers, as soon as the ringing stopped, I talked into the mouth peice as if my life depended on it. It did actually, Since I had no life without Darcy. She was my life. She had always came before me. Even though, being 2 years younger, I have never stopped taking care of her, making sure she wasokay. Begging her to let me know, anytime she thought she couldn't deal with the world's bull **** anymore, to let me know, that I would help her get through it. But she hadn't let me know today.The day she decided to take a weeks worth of pills. I have never been without her, if I were to let her die now, I would spiritually, mentally and emotionally go along with her.

"I think she's dead. My sister, Help!"

"9-1-1. What is your emergency?" the voice on the other end replied calmly, just pissing me off. How can she be so calm when someone could be dying? How could she be so calm when someone could be wasting away on the other line of the phone?

"Are you not understanding me? Send an amublance NOW!" I demanded, "She needs help, she overdosed! 3214 Ranbir Drive, send us help as soon as you can! She's dying!"

Calmly the operator replied, "Help is on the way," and I felt an urge to scream in her face, to demand her to be fearful and terrified, along with me.

I noticed I said us. We both needed help. We needed help, I didn't think anyone was capable of giving. Not mom or dad. Not a pill or a doctor. Not even a therapist.

I guess that was her job, to stay calm, But my world was caving in. I wanted others to be frightened and freaked out along with me.I wanted others to panic and run for cover with me.To let me know I'm not alone. I'm not the only one.

I held her head in my lap, being so out of control , I could only whisper "You were supposed to tell me. Tell me when you couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to know. I could've been here for you. Please don't die sissy. We can get through this, You and me, the way it's always been, together". I held her hand. It was clammy and sticky with sweat. I moved her hair from her face, and tucked it behind her ear, the way she always wore it. Her hair was tangled from not being combed all weekend. I could smell the liquor on her, making me sick to my stomach.

Faintly I could hear a siren few blocks away, I said "Their coming , sissy, you just have to hold on, a little longer, just a little bit longer" comforting her, hoping she wasn't already gone, too scared and in shock to think about checking her pulse.

All the moments she was there for me, my first boyfriend, my first breakup, when I broke my wrist and when I got a shard of glass the legnth of your pinky, stuck in my foot. While the doctors pulled it out she was there holding my hand. Now it was my turn to hold hers, And I wouldn't let go. I could'nt grasp how life would be without her.

When The sirens was merely a few streets away, I hopped up and opened the door. I waited for them to come and save Darcy, Save us both

I'm working on the first 2 chapters on my novel, and I was wondering if someone would lik to critique it. It's pretty short, so far, I want to go back and add tons of detail.

I started the novel, because My sister is in high school (i'm still in middle) and she has a creative writting class, and the teacher there has a publishing company and he lets the some seriously talented kids publish through him,though I'm still kinda an amatuer, I want to keep working on it until I get into that creative writting class and possibly publish it though his publishing thing.

So, i'm kinda getting a head start on it, and I want to know what you think. Id i keep adding to it, and adding more chapters over the years, do you think It could come out good?

Heres the link:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

I've been told it's kinda melodramatic, So I'ma go back and try and see what I can do about it.

And I've also been told theres a few grammar and punctuation mistakes, I'm going to also go back and fix that too. I'm trying to get a long list of the stuff thats'wrong and fix it up at one time.

I'm working on the first 2 chapters on my novel, and I was wondering if someone would lik to critique it. It's pretty short, so far, I want to go back and add tons of detail.

I started the novel, because My sister is in high school (i'm still in middle) and she has a creative writting class, and the teacher there has a publishing company and he lets the some seriously talented kids publish through him,though I'm still kinda an amatuer, I want to keep working on it until I get into that creative writting class and possibly publish it though his publishing thing.

So, i'm kinda getting a head start on it, and I want to know what you think. Id i keep adding to it, and adding more chapters over the years, do you think It could come out good?

Heres the link:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel%E2%80%A6

I've been told it's kinda melodramatic, So I'ma go back and try and see what I can do about it.

And I've also been told theres a few grammar and punctuation mistakes, I'm going to also go back and fix that too. I'm trying to get a long list of the stuff thats'wrong and fix it up at one time.

I'm working on the first 2 chapters on my novel, and I was wondering if someone would lik to critique it. It's pretty short, so far, I want to go back and add tons of detail.

I started the novel, because My sister is in high school (i'm still in middle) and she has a creative writting class, and the teacher there has a publishing company and he lets the some seriously talented kids publish through him,though I'm still kinda an amatuer, I want to keep working on it until I get into that creative writting class and possibly publish it though his publishing thing.

So, i'm kinda getting a head start on it, and I want to know what you think. Id i keep adding to it, and adding more chapters over the years, do you think It could come out good?

Heres the link:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

hope you enjoy

In my creative writing class we were writing short stories, and I finished mines. and I thought It was really good, so did my friends. So i decided to expand on it. so thats exactly what I'm doing. I would like you to critique it tell me weither you like it or not, what I should add, weither I don't make something clear, or if I don't use enough detail.

DON"T FORGET THERES A SECOND PART.

heres the link, hope you enjoy:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

I just started a novel, and I'm pretty excited about it, someone want to read over it, and tell me what you think, that would be greatly appreciated.

Just remember, It's not going to be perfect, I'm just 14. so, have mercy. :)

Link:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

I have an account on Booksie.com ( wonderful site, If you don't have one, should definitly check it out)

But I just posted a story, I'll give the link, but It's my first real novel And i want to know what you think of the first page.

thanks a ton.

The link is:

http://www.booksie.com/young_adult/novel/myamoo16/...

My mom, and her best friend, get together all the time. and she was over the other day, and she brings her son each time, because they think were such huge friends, but the truth is the takes complete advantage of me.

It's happened before, but i don't want to ruin my moms relationship with her best friend.

They were over my house, and we were in my room, my mom has a rule, that when boys are over, The door has to stay open, but this didn't stop him. it was late, and i had no idea what my mom and his mom were doing, but we were watching the movie Lovely bones. And it was coming to the part where the sister goes in the killers house, to look for the truth, and i was really freaked out. and each time he comes over, somehow, our discussions turns into something sexual. I don't even remember how it started but I remember telling him I wasn't interested, and he told me that thats what everyone says untill they have sex. He pulled out a condom, and asked me if i knew how to put one on a guy, and I said of course I know, theres not like you need any skills. He unzips his pants and tells me If I wanted to put it on him, and i said no. But I've never even seen a real penis, so I kept my eyes on the screen, but caught a glimpse of it out of the corner of my eye. I don't even know how I felt at that point, I just felt weird. like he was going to far. and than, he came where I was sitting at stood right in front of me, I told him that i had to go and take the bowl i was eating popcorn from downstairs, but he stopped me, He grabbed me and just held me, against him, so that i could feel his part touching against me. and than he pushed me on the bed, and told me if I was too loud my mom would hear us, and we both would get in trouble. By this point I was terrified, I never went this far, I knew he would make me have sex with him, and that freaked me out. he took off my pants and ripped my underwear, and he put them with his other stuff. I just laid there, really still, I didn't want to move so it would be over. I thought i could tought it out, but as soon as he put it in, I felt like all the wind left me, It felt so bad, I heard about there supposing to be foreplay, if if there wasnt' sex would be painful, so i guess it was because I wasn't wet at all. i tried to close my legs but he was so strong, He didn't even seem to have to strain to keep them open, he just kept going. I never thought my first time would be like this, I felt like I was being killed. I don't even know if i screamed, I just wanted it to be over.and then after a while, it seemed like for ever, he put it in my mouth. I remember begging him, to let me go, but he didn't care, I felt like throwing up, he had it so far in, I couldn't breath, and there was nothing I could do about it. My throat was on fire. My private parts was burning, and i felt like i wasn't my self, i felt like i was viewing it from a different angle, I felt like i was watching him take something from some poor little girl. afterwards, he got dressed and just walked out, he just left me there. feeling like a slave. I didn't say anything, I don't want my mom to lost her best friend. But I don't want this to continue. I just feel like I have no say in what happens, Im a little 14 year old girl, who was raped by a 16 year old.

I don't even know what answer you can give me, just knowing that someone other than me knows, is fine. I'm just praying to god the condom didn't rip.

My friend just told me the other day that she steals the candy we eat from the store, all year long, i believed her mom owned a candy shop, and she was just getting a sweet deal like she told me, but obviously thats not the case. she brings like 10 packs of gum, and hershey bars, and sour candy, and skittles and starburst, and then she even sells some. what should i do, i don't want to be classified as a theft, because all year long i've been chewing stolen gum, and eating stolen candy.

So last month, i saw some light bleeding, and thought it could be i was starting my period, but i did some research and they said if you weren't sure, wait a month, to be completely sure.

but i then thought that it could be some left over blood from when we and my boyfriend was fooling around. we were deciding if we should start having sex, and found out that you should be able to comftably fit 2 fingers inside before trying to have sex. and there had been a little bleeding. but i thought that what i was seeing was just some blood from that, but if it was my period coming wouldn't i of had it by the 4th? or around that date?

I didn't go to school yesterday, because I wasn't feeling well, and I was looking through the pictures of us when we were little, my mom keeps them in a big box. And in this box, tucked in the pictures, were several wads of envelopes, some were opened some were not opened, and i looked at the name, The name read Bronshan Wilson. He has been writing since 1998. and my mom has not mentioned it at all, and in the notes, he's asking, why she won't let me call him, and why she won't let him come and visit. and the thing was at the end of each letter, there had to be hundreds, but at the end of each letter there was a bottom line that said, kiss her for me. But im very interested in talking to him, and gaining a father, daughter relationship. I was wondering should i mention all the letters. because when my mom found out she was pregnant, she left, she didn't want anything to do with him. I was just wondering what tips anyone has, i want him to be in my life, and i feel i deserve to have a dad. im 13 years old, and im old enough to be mature about this situation. PLEASE HELP.

I don't want to ask my mom,or she may think i have some kind of issues, and she'll say I have a very healthy weight. Every since my sister has been diagnosed with Depressioin, every thing sets her off. I want some simple exercices to do, that won't make a big different or anything, to quickly, or she may think I don't eat enough, or make my self throwup. please help if you can.

I think about it alot, and was wondering is this normal for a 13 year old girl, and plus i masturbate, I wonder who my first time will be with and how it will feel and when. I seriously can't wait untill my first time, is this normal?

Ok, im 13 and I already wear a B cup, near a C, and I have one of the biggest chests in the 7th grade, my mom tries to get me to wear the old loose grandma( no offense ) tee shirts, and I don't know what to do.

Please help, i know i can't shrink thhem, just something to make them look smaller.

OK, I talk very very fast, and on this law and order episode, this girl said that she did, and she was bipolar, and so, me being me, I looked into it ( I have put x's near the ones I have lots of symptoms), and some of the Symptoms are:

Feeling unusually “high” and optimistic [x ] extremely irritable [ x ]

Unrealistic [ x ] grandiose beliefs about one’s abilities or powers [ ]

Sleeping very little, but feeling extremely energetic [ x ]

Talkin' so rapid that others cant keep up [ x x x ]( this is the big problem, i talk so fast all the time)

Racing thoughts; jumping quickly from one idea to the next [ x x ]

Highly distractible, unable to concentrate [ x ]

Impaired judgment and impulsiveness [ x ]

Acting recklessly without thinking about the consequences [ x ]

Delusions and hallucinations (in severe cases) ( gladly i don't have this one.)

Well, my mom keeps saying she's going to take me to the docter to get checked, but she says it in a joking way, should i bring it up? I think she's so stressed because my sister, has recently been diagnosed with Depression, so. it's been really ... tense in my house..what should i do?

My mom said you never actualy get paid for it, but on this site called *************, they have forums, of teens with their checks. SO , I've already started it, and I've already started, will she be mad, when i get the check in the mail?

Where can I volunteer in Durham Nc at the age of 13? I've looked at a lot of things.

-THanks

My mom is the best freind of one of my distant freinds. and He comes over, repeatedly. And he completely takes advantge of me. I recently posted a question titled: Is this rape, and everyone said no and stuff.

But I want to post what happened Thursday.

We were at home, Because our moms' had gone to get some food for us, at this place called Cook-out, and it's kinda far from out house. So I had asked to go, since I knew what he had done last time we were home alone, he persuaded me to let him feel around down there. Im 13 and he''s 15. Our mom's dont think any things going on since were child hood freinds, so me and him, were upstairs watching T.V, and all of a sudden he's telling me about how he broke up with his girl freind, because She wouldn't have sex with him, I tried to ignore him, I didn't want to start tallking about sex, and then give him the wrong impression that i was interested in it, which im not. but he kept asking me if i was a virgn, and i would say: why. and that went on for a while. so nothing happened at first but then, he asked me if i planned on doing it soon, and i said no, I want to be married, and he said that it's the 21st century, no ones a virgin when they get married, and i knew that was untrue, my mom was a virgin, (or so she says) when she got married. but He kept trying to get me to talk about sex. So i said that I would have sex, if i was ready, and was in love, and he asked if i liked him, he's cute and all, but he has tons of girl freinds. and i said that i thought he was cute, and as soon as i said that, he leaned to wards me and kissed me, out of nowhere! And my face turned red. so he grabbed me and pulled me to him, and I was so scared. because we were alone at my house, and i didn't know how long my mom would take to get home, so as he was kissing me, i wasn't kissing back but thats not the part that matters. He started feeling me up, and thats when i said something, i said thatL my mom would be home, and he tried to pull my shirt off, but he couldn't get it off, so he started working on my pants, i told him that: I would tell my mom this time, if he didn't leave me alone. but either he didn't hear, or didn't care. so he got my pants off, and he asked me if i was on my period, and I said that it didn't matter, because he would leave me alone. but nothing i said would get him to leave me alone, so he took his pants off, and underware, and apparently he'd been planning this because he pulled a condom out of he pocket. and thats when he told me that: he wouldn't hurt me, and that i would like it, the same thing as last time, but only he said that his mom knew what we were doing, and I didn't believe it. and he tried to get my panties off, but i wouldn't let him, so he pulled me to the edge of the bed, and tried to put his mouth down there, but I kicked him in the nose, and he was so mad, that he shoved me out of the bed, and after he went in the bath room to clean his nose off, like 3 minutes later my mom came home home, and he ran out the bathroom, and he helped me put my pants on, by that time my tears were dry, and i noticed 2 bruises on my arms, that he must of put there when he tried to get me on the edge of the bed. and i had to wear long sleeves the rest of the week.

WHAT DO I DO, i don't think my mom will believe me, and I'm thinking of moving to my dad's house anyway, should i just wait till i leave for my dad's house to tell?