any suggestions for disciplining an autistic child?
I have a 4 year old nephew that soon may be coming to live with me that has been neglected, and had no discipine, i am researching autism to familiarize myself any help would be welcome. Thanks!
2006-11-04T04:42:15Z
colleen, obviously you don't know what neglect is! he has never been evaluated, however we believe due to symptoms that he is autistic, I just needed to info to help me out a little, I didn't want to discipline him incorrectly, and cause more problems. Thanks to all for your wonderful answers. you have been a big help!!
momof32006-10-31T19:19:01Z
Favorite Answer
It depends on the degree of autism. If he is severely autistic, you need to see a physician to determine the degree and make a plan of action. He may need therapy, etc., and there may be specific areas of concern that require more understanding as far as discipline is concerned. My son is high-functioning, so we discipline in almost the same way any other parent would. The difference is that we explain a lot more because he wants reasons for everything. He is extremely black and white, right and wrong, so everything requires explanation.
I have worked with autistic kids in a school setting for 14 years. Google autism to get good sites, read everything you can get your hands on and remember to be consistent. Go to the school closest to you and find out if there are any other parents of autistic children close. It seems to help the parents immensely to have someone to talk to that really knows what they are going through. Remember a few things that have helped me with most of the children I have worked with, sometimes it takes up to 5 seconds for a question or direction to register with the child, some autistic kids CAN'T look at you and listen to you at the same time, the littlest noises or lighting change or smell CAN be a huge trigger for unwanted behavior, for SOME autistic kids. Just remember too that your nephew could very well be as smart or smarter than other kids his age, just trapped inside a body that cannot respond or register things the way other people do The trick is to find out how he does see things, what he likes, dislikes and what he is good at. He will still need all the attention other kids need even if he doesn't look like he wants it. You are a generous person to take this on, good luck!
Autistic children are very difficult to deal with, you really need to do your research before agreeing to take on such a feat, and you should not discipline a child for a disability, and thats exactly what autism is. Autistic children often have tantrums, attempting to discipline them during these tantrums will only make matters worse. Autistic children need structure, a daily routine. Often times autistic children do not like to be touched. The way I was trained to deal with an autistic person when they were having a bhavior was to put them send them to a room by theirself when they are having a tantrum. It is very important that there is nothing in this room that they could harm themselves or others with. Autistic people take everything around them in and they are extremely sensative. It takes a lot of love to raise an autistic child.
If sever you using a belt or sending them to their room is not going to help. First you need to contact a therapist and come up with a behavior plan. Autistic children prefer visuals, so if is non verbal then you should use either sign language for pictures. Display good behavior. Your going to have to show him over and over the proper way to do things. Be very consistent, and structured. for he will literally fall apart if you don't. Prepare him for ever thing before it happens, even leaving to go to the store, if its out of your routine. There are all types of service so get help. This is what I do for a living. You could get a TSS therapeutic staff support to come to your house to help you with behavior, and a BSC who will guide you through a behavior plan. Autistic children are very unique, educate your self, because you have a long road ahead. Be loving, and try to enjoy. He will appreciate you more in the long run if you have the right skills and get the proper help.
Read lots of books about autism first. The more you know the better. There's a woman right now who's autistic and in the middle of a great writing career, I forgot her name (sorry), but i'm sure your siblings (in law?) know who she is; she's quite popular among parents of autistic kids. My cousin is autistic and he seems to do well with gentle but firm discipline. Yelling at him just gets him stressed out and he'll not be able to handle it and starts running around yelling and crying -- basically inconsolable. But when my uncle sits down with him and calmly tries reasoning with him, things usually go much better. Hope this helps.