What's the best way of getting my mother to stop critising everything my fiance does???
She has made it very clear that she doesn't like him and we have both accepted the fact she will never approve. She is constantly saying not so nice things about him both behind his back and to his face. We have a 1 year old son and according to her he does every thing wrong, like he can't feed him properly and doesn't change his nappies in the right way (despite the fact that he does every thing the same way I do). I have even overheard her saying to our son that Daddy is a mean person. How do I get her to stop???
tony2007-03-12T03:01:43Z
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What's important is your new family. I know you want your mother to immediately to accept your fiancee, but the more you make an effort to please her. She's going to continue to criticize your fiancee.
What I will do is limit her from visiting her grandson! Why? Tell your mom this 'I am not going to allow you to criticize my fiancee, especially in front of my son, because if you are not going really be supportive of me and my son, then you won't see your grandson'
It's going to come a time when your son will pick up some of the negative vibes from your mom. If she's not satisfy with the way you and your fiancee raise your child, or if she just continue to mistreat the man you love, then you must separate yourself from her! This will give her sometime to think about her actions. This matter can escalates to the point where she will attack your son as well.
You have to give her some ultimatums or either be respectful or limit yourself from her! If you're relying on her from financial reasons, you're going have to start making some better arrangements! Just post for help in yahoo q@a. I will pray your situation. Good luck
Stop the visits with your son and husband when you do go see her. Let her know why because her words hurt all of you. If she promises to behave, give her one more chance and no more. If she's nice, then see her again, but if she does or says something wrong again, just stop the relationship with her for your son and husband's sake. They need you and your mom should come second now. She must be jealous of you. That's too bad if that's the case. I wish you the best.
That is terrible, it is one thing to say to you that she doesn't approve but to start telling your son things and try to turn the child against his father is another.
Is your fiance violent, abusive, from what your saying I guess he isn't and he is every bit the doting partner and father most men are so your mum has no reason to hate him!!!
I would take her to one side and tell her that either she respects your choice of partner and the fact that he is father to her grandchild or you will stop her visiting your home. At the end of the day that is your fiance's home and he has every right to feel wanted and respected in it. As punishment I would tell your mum that you will stop visiting her as well.
Here's the cheesy answer. Tell her if she wants you in her life she has to lighten up. Explain how it makes you feel, that you love him, and that all she is doing is driving a wedge between herself and you two. Here's the better answer.Have your guy leave for a week. Then, pay the biggest, scariest biker you can find to come home with you. When you see your mother, tell her she was right and Scorpion will make a much better husband. (make sure he pinches her butt at that point) She will probably pickup your fiance herself...
Parent are scared. Your mother is scared of you being hurt. scared of loosing you. Maybe after her own bad experiences or things she has heard? I think it is about time you sat down and had a chat with her to tell her You are growing up you need to live. You love this guy, and he loves you and mother needs to know that its not ok for her to say these things or she really will loose you forever.