I need help with this clown...?

Okay, so me and this guy have been going out for a month and he still hasn't taken me on an official date. Sure, everyday is like a date, blah blah blah. He won't take me anywhere for some unknown reason!! I've asked him countless times, so no, I'm not just waiting for him to ask me. I just ask him if he wants to go to the movies or something and he says no. Then, when I'm not home he calls and later says he was wanted to take me out; that he made the effort, I just wasn't home. What the hell! I love him to death, but he acts like such a clown sometimes, it's hard to understand when he is serious and isn't. What can I do to make him take me out?--I know he wants to, he just hasn't! I need help controlling this clown. Thanks you guys for your help, 'cause I'm really lost right now. And, no, I will not break up with him over something this small and stupid...

2007-05-30T16:21:21Z

Guys, this isn't something that is sparking a serious issue in out relationship and no way is he shy! He just likes to play mind games--like someone mentioned. It's nothing I'd dump him for. He is a really good guy, he just acts so silly and jokes around when I tell him to take me somewhere. He'd never cheat on me, that I know. He's...just...being who he is. He's loud and is just messing with me. And to the guy down there, this ain't no booty call! I am not controlling him!! I couldn't tame him if I wanted to. I tell him one thing an he does the other. I CAN'T control him, or do I want to. At the beginning of the realtionship he said: "I saw some previews to some movies I want to take you to." He just never acted on it. I've talked to him about this time and time again--he's just a clown. He'll take me, I was just wondering if there was anything more I could say to show him I'm serious about him taking me somewhere.

2007-05-30T16:25:15Z

Takfam--I am not the clown, he is. You don't know me or him, only what I wrote in a half a page. I am not "controlling" anyone. He can't be controlled, nor would I want to. He's his own person, he's just playing mind games with me. He doesn't care what other people think, so he doesn't care if we're seen in public. He's...just...a clown. He can be serious when he wants to, he just isn't. He'll come around eventually.


Thanks for all your answers, guys! You always know what to do. I'll pick a best answer soon.

2007-06-02T05:38:50Z

Let me make something crystal clear, because I don't think I have...He does some of the stupidest things all the time, he gets himself into trouble and just does the dumbest things (I'm not going to give any examples) the point is, I dont want to "control" him, per se, just tame him so that he can see that part of being a great boyfrined (which he is) means preserving his personality, but putting the effort and taking me somewhere, too. Just to be serious a little bit of the time before he does something stupid and really regrets it. I've had a countless number of people close to him (these people were adults, mind you) ask me to keep him in check and make sure he doesn't do anything really dumb. I could never control him, as I said before, I just want to show him that he should try and be a little serious and put more effort into our relationship. I love him and want what's best for him...

Clown Knows2007-05-30T15:32:48Z

Favorite Answer

Just plan going someplace with him and don't give him the option to back out or make any decisions.

Anonymous2007-05-30T15:41:06Z

talk to him about it and if he likes u then he would understand. He's probably not ready or is afraid. Give him time cuz a month is short but if he still doesn't then ask him again and tell him how u feel. Or ask him to go sumwhere where he likes to go or a place where u guys can have fun so he would want to go. Make it seem like u guys r hanging out then on a date so he will know how much fun a date would be if he asked u out.

Good luck!=)

Mary2007-05-30T15:32:30Z

you need to have a straight up conversation with him. sit him down, look him in the eye. ask him if he's embarassed of you or something. of course he'll say no, but it'll put things in perspective of how you're feeling. after he says no, ask then why won't he take you out? tell him to be a real couple you need to go out and spend time together alone. also, mention that you don't have to do something like the movies, you could just go to the mall and walk around (just in case money is an issue, suggesting low cost fun is a good idea without killing his machoness). good luck!

Andrea2007-05-30T15:32:43Z

Okay, this one sounds tricky... I would sit him down alone and talk to him about it let him know that there's more to dating than saying you are. Let him know the effort he's putting forth isn't enough, tell him he needs to care about what you want too. Honestly if he still doesn't do it he isn't worth your time. I know you deserve someone to take you out on a date at least, so don't settle if this one isn't right.

Anonymous2007-05-30T15:36:45Z

ok so maybe he is shy? you never really know what guys are thinking. the'll act one way one day and the complete opposite the next. its very confusing. LOL i know all about it :P but maybe you should talk to him and ask him why he doesnt want to take you out. if he ses he does n ur never home wen he wants to say well lets go out then now. watever! if you put him on the spot he cant just make up some lame excuse.

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