My girlfriend has had her own house for 15 years. She did every improvement...(landscaping etc,) herself. Well..I was a single (divorced for 20 years) We fell in love and I moved in with her 2 years ago..
The neighbor died who helped her in all her projects before we moved in together.
She sees him as her "other father" He was 84.
Her parents are still alive .
She cries 10 times a day.......
I don't know what to say to her to calm her...and I really think she is going to make a scene at his funeral.
Should I just let her get it out? Restrain her?
Please no answers containing the words "grieve counciling"
Southern Sweetness2008-01-24T22:28:53Z
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I lost my father in Dec. it was extremely hard. If this man was like her other father, then trust me she is going through an EXTREMELY rough time right now. Just be there for her, don't try to restrain her from her pain. Just let her get her pain out, whatever you do, don't make her feel as though she shouldn't cry as much as she has. And the funeral may not affect her as bad as you're imagining. After the shock of he is gone is released for the most part that will be one of the hardest things she will have to face, the funeral. But if people she loves stands beside her and helps her through it will be a much smoother process for her and you..
well, seeing that you've actually noticed her change in behavior, let her mourn the loss. don't restrain her. it may take some adjusting, and sorry to say, but it could be anywhere from a couple weeks to a couple months.
keep in mind that you're her boyfriend. you're the rock- you're her comfort-zone. its going to be up to you to make her feel at her best. and lol, greive councelling is quite.. much, so i would suggest getting her a journal and telling her to relieve her thoughts rather than.. cry it.
Talk to her about it as much and as often as you can. She needs to get her feelings out with someone that she trusts. She'll eventually work it out but it will take a lot of patience from you.