Are there a many adopted people who don't have children?
I have absolutely no knowledge about any stats on this, nor do I have an opinion on it. I am only asking because recently one of my AP friends said that she's noticed that many adoptees that she knows don't have children. She thinks that perhaps a higher percentage of adoptees than non-adoptees don't end up having children. I found it an interesting thought.
I am interested in evidence that leads to either a positive or negative conclusion, both anecdotal and statistical, if statistical evidence can be found.
Concerning my own situation, I'm adopted and have no children. My best friend is adopted and has no children. I'm infertile. She's not infertile, but chose to not have children.
As I stated previously, I have no evidence or opinion about her thought being either true or false. I'm looking forward to a variety of responses. Thanks, everyone.
2008-02-26T17:21:09Z
A-OK and Problem Child, the secondary infertility concept is interesting. My nfather had no children after relinquishing me. He told his wife that he already had a daughter even though he couldn't be with her, so didn't feel comfortable having others.
Sunny2008-02-26T15:23:30Z
Favorite Answer
I'm adopted, and was intentionally childless until I was 38. I knew I wanted children, but would not consider having them until I was in a place emotionally, financially, etc. where I could do the best parenting job I was capable of doing.
I now have 3 children. It seems most adoptees I know IRL have children. My BFF, also adopted has 2. The adoptees I know online are mixed, either have children, or are intentionally childless.
There were three of us given up for adoption. I had three children, my sister had two and I have a brother who had none.
Honestly, the fact that I am an adoptee didn't really affect my decision on whether or not I was going to have children, but I did wait until I was married, had a stable income and a home and knew that I could provide them with the kind of life I didn't have.
My bio mother didn't have anymore children and my bio father had a son, that didn't know he even had other siblings.
I think that consciously or unconsciously an adoptee's decision on whether or not to have children, or not having them until they know they can provide for them is directly related to the fact that they were given up for adoption.
I'd like to know how many adoptee's have given their children up for adoption. I'd never put my children through that system! No one would be able to convince me that the system has changed and some of those foster parents weren't fit to raise dogs, let alone a child--although, I would choose adoption over abortion--at least the child has a fighting chance.
I am 34 and I don't have any children. I didn't think that I wanted any until recently. I always thought my depression and other problems were hereditary and I didn't want to pass them and any other medical problems that I don't know about on to my children. I know think that most of my problems stem from the act of adoption, not just my biological parents.
My boyfriend who is 34 was adopted out of foster care. He also does not have any children. We have talked about having a child together and how the child would be the "first" blood relative for both of us.
My adopted brother is 37 and he doesn't have any children and as far as I know ( to the surprise of his wife) doesn't want to have any.
One of my friends has a brother and a sister who were both adopted, she was biological. Her brother married another adoptee and they have had 3 biological children. Her sister is married and adopted 3 children out of foster care but has no biological children. I am not sure if she tried to have biological children or not.
More evidence that every adoptees experience is different!
I am an adoptee and I don't have children. This is a decision I have made for now. I have two role models of mothers, both of them awful in different ways. What do I know about being a good mother!
And yes they were a big part of the decision not to, as was the constant reminder by people to not have kids at the wrong time, with the wrong person etc like my first mother. And my adoptive mother whose own family say they are surprised us kids turned out as well as we did because she is/was so strange and damaged (her families words not mine).
I have often heard that bmoms don't have kids afterwards (i believe the term is secondary infertility) so i would also like to know how many bmoms end up adopting?
this is an excellent question that you've posted. I am an adoptee but i do have a child AND a beautiful 6 mo old granddaughter. I know a few other adoptees with child(ren) but, since i don't always bring up adoption, i can't be sure of the many pregnant people i see around work if they're adoptees or bmoms.
good question -- i'm looking forward to seeing the answers.