My son is almost five, and he doesn't like to clean up. I have sat there with him and tried to race him to see who can clean up the fastest, I have tried to make him stay in his room until it is done, I have put him in time out, I have even taken away all of the toys he doesn't pick up but it still doesn't work. So, I was wondering how do you get your children to clean up? I need some new idea's so I don't talk until I am blue in the face anymore. Thanks alot!!
starfire9782008-03-22T23:29:03Z
Favorite Answer
:D Bribery! Be it a handful of M&M's or a chance to sit down and watch a favorite movie or get a calender and each day his room is clean he gets to put a star/sticker up and when it reaches a week or whatever length you feel is good you guys get to go out to the park or ice cream...whatever gets his interest. The trick of it is to make it fun! Trust me I know how it is. What worked for my 4 yr old in the end was getting some new storage bins and a set of shelves for him to put his toys away. I told him it was his toys "bedtime place" He's really big on when bedtime is and the sun/moon is sleeping.
You have to get very specific. Not "let's clean your room", but "now put your cars in the blue bin" and "now put your blocks in the middle drawer". Like the others said, make it fun, but I find making it a bit of a challenge can motivate, also. Get a kitchen timer. See if he can get all his little cars in the blue bin before the timer goes off...two minutes! Give him a star on his "clean up" chart if he does. Three stars earns him a little treat (you know what he likes...food is fine on occasion, but make it something other than food most of the time so he doesn't start to relate food to rewards, which can contribute to eating disorders).
Some of it may be a power struggle. Try the carrot AND the stick..if he does what he's supposed to do he gets the reward (maybe you can let him put the star on the chart himself), but if he doesn't, YOU quietly clean up the toys and then they're YOUR toys so you put them away where you can get to them but he can't. Don't make a fuss about it. Just do it and then go do something else in another room. This takes the focus off him...he doesn't see that it bothers Mom, he just doesn't get his toys any more (find a way to let him earn them back in a day or two).
Music can also be a motivator....pop in the "clean up song", a cheerful, upbeat song to put toys away by. If you do this I'd suggest having other songs....maybe "get dressed for bed" song and "brush your teeth" song.
I think perhaps you're getting bent out of shape over the not-putting-his-toys-away and he sees that it gets to you and this gives him a sense of power. Make a point of staying calm if you have to pick up the toys yourself. Good luck!
When it is time to clean the room you need to tell him. "time to clean you room", not "let's clean the room". The second way of saying it makes it seem more like a choice, which it is not.
Tell him the room has to be cleaned and he can choose how it is done. Ask him if he wants to play the cleaning game. I put on music(get a long, fun, high energy dance song). Tell him that you're going to play the song and see if you can get the room cleaned before the song stops. Try and make it fun, goof off an bit while cleaning, laugh, dance, etc.
I am in the same boat and tried everything that you just mentioned, and my daughter is only three. The only thing that has worked for me even in the slightest is to tell her that I will help with it and once I start she helps me also. I will admit that I am cleaning much more than she is, but at least she is helping me and she gets the idea. I also try to figure out what she wants to do next and I tell her that she cannot have/do what she wants until we clean her room. I figure when they are this young it is okay to help them clean their room as long as they are helping us. Now if we are still doing it 10 years from now, that may be a problem:)
More than making it into discipline. You can make it into a fun activity. Some ideas are turning on children music and have them clean up by following the beat. Another activity is playing freeze as you turn on the music on and off. The child's goal is to clean before the song stops. In my classroom, I have a clean up music too. As I make it into a daily activity, now my preschoolers knows to clean up once the song comes out. Good Luck!