How old were your kids when you let them play outside by themselves?
I live in a military housing complex that is in the community therefore anybody can drive into it and see what you are up to. My question how old were your children before you let them play outside by themselves? In my mind my son is too young to go knocking on other people's doors and asking if they can play by himself. He is six. I will let him outside in our fenced in backyard while I am in the house and still keeping an eye out for him not to mention the many times he will run in the house for another toy.
But I find it annoying that parents of first graders let their children just knock on our door expecting me to let my child out to play while no one is actually watching them. I also think that parents should get together to set up times in the day the kids can actually play. My son always comes home with homework and usually has other things going on through out the night that we usually don't have time to play during the week and on the weekends we are busy with family things so I do feel guilty that my son doesn't get to play with his friends but I also feel like the parents should at least come with the kids to make sure it is okay if they play.
Am I wrong in my thoughts? Thanks everybody!
2009-09-28T12:47:59Z
The parents live in another court so I don't know where they live. The kids won't tell you because the parents basically tell them to get out of the house until it is time for dinner... you can hear the parents yelling at the kids when it is time... really loud like they have no idea where they are at. I find it a horrible way to "babysit" your kids.
Molly D2009-09-28T17:18:32Z
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Developmentally, I don't think children are old enough until 8 1/2. Eight is the "magic" age when they can fully understand the concept of time, not just reading the clock. Also, it is when they can start judging distances accurately. That is important so they don't run across the street thinking they have enough time before the car passes. Also, they can start thinking more logically.
It's sad when I see parents letting young children out unsupervised. One of the neighbor girls comes over to play with the 7 year old girl I nanny by herself, at age 4. It got to the point where I said she couldn't come over any more because I watch a 4 year old and 7 year old differently.
I don't think you are wrong at all. We moved to a Metro Detroit area after living our whole lives up north (up by the U.P in Michigan) and my 4 kids were only used to having each other around to play with unless we went somewhere. Now we live in a double wide community and all the neighborhood children are here in our back yard to play. We have set aside a day once a week we call "family day" so no one is allowed over all day, and my children don't leave the yard without me. Granted my oldest is 9 years old but my youngest is 4 and if we as parents don't protect them than who will? I constantly have to turn kids away because they show up even before my kids get home from school! It is horribly frustrating, and I have only met 1 mother from around here that took the time to meet me and make sure it was alright for her son to play. I totally know what your going through, I have 4 so I deal; with it all one by one when all of their friends come over . Keep it up, hopefully with time the kids will get the hint and just stop dropping by without asking first.
My parents let me play outside around 8 but I had to tell them where I was going and who I would be playing with. I also had to come home and check in every hour and I had to be home before dark. My mom usually would make me call the person in the neighborhood first to see if they could play before she let me run out the front door, and the streets were off limits.
I think it depends on your personal securities and boundaries. What ever makes you feel comfortable as it is your child. And don't feel bad, if he wants to play let him invite a friend over on the weekend for a sleep over or something. Then they can play together in the house or backyard with your supervision and still get that social interaction.
When I was younger parents would take turns watching kids. My mom had a friend that lived two doors down. All the moms would come outside and check on their kids, Like every 15-20 minutes. My mom would watch me and other kids for a few minutes then someone else would watch us. That way moms could make dinner without really worrying we were getting into trouble. Im my day you also didnt let your kids run a muk. If I was at someone's house they had my mom permission to spank me or send me home. BQ: Not a mom yet, but even I hated that stupid thing when I was little. My mom encouraged my but I knew I sucked.
I think it's sad that kids cant call for each other any more...I always used to when I was 5 or 6..but that was in the 1970s. People see things differently now....although apparently child abduction cases are the same now as they were then..we just have more media to hear about them. The parents should come with the child...or call first....if I were you I would go around to the parents of the kids he likes best..and say "HEy, would it be ok if x came to play with my son on Saturday at around 2,00? We're really bust otherwise but he's desperate to play together!" then you are setting the president....making the rules...my daughter is 5...I dont let her call for the little girl over the road because her Mum is really protective..though I would not mind if they played in my garden...or indeed if the child called for my daughter....it's nice for them to be friends with the local kids.