my heart, it hurts (plz read the whole thing and help will you guys)?
ok so my granma she is very old.we have to take care of her everything like even walk her. anways will try to make it short.
because of this economical problems my dad could not like keep her in the house for some time because my mother could not be there for her all the time as beck then even she started to work. so my uncles and aunts took her. but they could not always keep her (you know why).
and after she had to leave from our house all the family and even my dad a little thought of her like a burden. but kept doing things like it was. but soon my sisters and mom and even dad were like totally like she is a burden. and slowly slowly changed behavior. although things are pretty much the same. just that now others sometimes ignore her.
but me, i never changed my way about her. i always stayed with her. did everything she said. never complained. even when the time came when my sisters started to say "oh ya well why dont you do that for her eh?" i just did things for her . and now that EVERYONE thinks of her as a burden just showing that she isnt .....sometimes even doing that (but i think she cant understand anyways LOL) i still kept my ways like they were.
i used to sit her besides me when i am on the comp or TV.and stuff like that you get the idea. i had in mind that if i be nice to my grandma then my grand kids wil be nice with me.
but today when she asked for food i did stood up and went to get it. but my heart was like ............ not likening it. i did not do it by my will. i was like wishing she just didnt asked me that. before today i was just like when she asked i went to do that no feelings like that. but today it happened.
and now my heart hurts. tell me guys what to do i really feel hurt for feeling like that. now i fear that maybe my grand kids would do the ame to me. what should i do to make it up? like i did the same thing from outside but not from the inside. what to do?
PIECES!!!!
i am 16 years old and the biggest son in the house. my words are orders after my mom and dad. i am not pressured at all.
that is why i am disgusted by my heart
my granma is like 100 +
funde bahi it didnt help at all. the first part i mean. because when i think of myself in my grandmas place. i imagine a big chest small shining silver bearded guy with my grand pas cane in my right hand. wearing a kurta shalwar and running my own football company like zia-u-deen khuwaja (my mother's side grand pa's brother).
if i was in her place i would have been independent and would not let others do stuff for me and make me weak in my last time.
just like your second part said. i ask refuge from the laziness. actually now i find myself and my family in fault.
because my faimly served her all life my mom did that for 16 years now and we did not let gave her a chance to do a thing. we did each and everything for her.
if only i was not so polite to her back then. then no one would have thought her as a burden
now i find myself at fault :'-(
@zeshan
LOL!!!! abe lagta ha ke hamari kismat ik dosre ke liye bohat hi kharab ha LOL