Who's right, me or my husband?
My husband an I have had a few problems lately. He's depressed and I just can't understand how that effects him. I'm the type of person who believes that if you have a problem you fix it or you suck it up. He's been depressed for 3 years now and the fact that he's not at the doc every couple weeks to try and get this fixed leads me to believe it's just not that serious. I'm going to sign us up for counseling since I'm just fed up with him really not participating in the household.
Our current problem is that he sold his car a few weeks ago and has been looking for a new one already. He's looking for cars in our homestate and we live overseas. When we return to the US we will not be living in our homestate since I'm military. We already have to move two vehicles from our homestate to our next duty station (my practical grocery go getter and a truck that belongs to his dad). We also have to move all his tools because he was not comfortable putting them in government storage. He want to buy a 3rd vehicle and keep it at his parents house - which means we would have to move 3 vehicles. He keeps telling me that I don't have to worry about it and he'll move everything but I do worry about it. His plan is to rent a car trailer for the car he's buying and tow it down with the truck - his dad will drive my car down and I will fly down with our daughter. I asked him why he feels pressure to buy another car and he finally told me that he feels sad since he sold his car and just wants one at home to make him feel better. I think this is the silliest thing ever - it's just a car. Here's what I want to do: He drives the truck down and I drive the car down. We get to our next duty station and get housing, get my daughter established in daycare, find out if we even have the space for 3 vehicles - and then he can start looking for a new car. I've explained all this to him and he just keeps telling me to think about him buying a car now. I've made up my mind - it's stupid to buy a new car at this point when we don't even know where we're going to be living and if we'll even be able to keep it. I wanted to get outside opinions on what people think and see if anyone knows of any way to compromise in this situation.
Also, we will be living overseas for another year, so the car would just sit at his dad's house.
Ok, "feeling sad" is not a valid reason to spend 10K on something that you may have to get rid of later. I agree with him on a lot of things - him keeping his tools at his dad's house, even though the government would move them free if we had put them in storage. He gets to buy pretty much whatever he wants, including plane tickets home whenever he wants, new tires, and car parts. All I'm asking him to do is wait until we are actually settled in our next location - is that really so much to ask?
Avoid - no one would be using the car while it was at his dad's house. He always has to have two vehicles so that he can fix one up and drive the other one and keep switching back and forth. He's buying his dad's truck for sentimental reasons too. The money from the sale of his car was always going to be used to buy him another one, it turns out that the year and model he wants will leave us with extra money. We've already agreed that whatever extra money we have when we move back will be divided in half. With his half he can buy his dad's truck and car parts and I'm going to buy some new furniture for our house.