hey i havent written a poem in awhile so dont be to harsh. i wrote this in about ten minutes. ill probably go back and rewrite all of it but i still wanted to post it. thanks for reading.
like the black left behind after i die is the feeling thats half here. and i always wondered how to describe what being in space is like and now i know, after you left me. everywhere i see is empty and bleak i wouldnt half mind disappearing like a star going out, leaving with a bang that no planet hears absorbed by the black, and forgotten.
no warmth is here
?2011-03-07T21:25:06Z
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It's alright. I like the idea of using the emptiness of outer space as a metaphor for death but I don't think you've quite done your idea justice. Keep working on it.
The purple vs the blue, what a dazzling website its all one the sting of this beautful nighttime anticipation is extreme and passions run deep hearts are all humming, without an oz. of sleep pals and foes nestled close by area a million minute to pass, as we glance ahead to the experience And now their off each and every of the colors a blur the reds and the blues and a yellow? how absurd! its a tug of conflict all for the time of the nighttime neither team giving floor everyones up for the combat 5 minutes to pass, no fulfillment from the two area the tention is mounting in the direction of the top of the experience yet now a glimpse of desire an prolonged shot down the way each and every of the followers are on their feet, screaming "No way!" yet he does, and he's on slightly saves it from leaving play he then looks up, and sees a single soul down the way. he go's it low, and prefer a mirage it meets the capability and accuracy of a guy named Gerrard its complicated and its quickly, swirving this form and that, yet whilst Gerrard hit it he never appeared returned halfway to the corner to his followers on the kop the roar of the stadium could make your coronary heart stop liverpool has completed it one neil at homestead and the cheers and the laughs drown out Evertons moan
I think it was pretty good for only having worked on it for 10 minutes. It was defiantly different, but cool and unique. I say work on it a little but all together it was pretty good. :)