dont have normal lives and such? apparently, everyone thinks we spend our whole lives quivering in a corner or picketing the white house ( or wherever you are from ) and act like this all the time. We dont. We have jobs, kids, husbands, sig o's and regular lives - on here you only get to see one small part of who we are...sometimes its a dark, sad part.
2011-03-29T10:18:12Z
Being an adoptee and bmom does not define me.
2011-03-30T08:38:13Z
Ahh...see Jennifer? That's kinda what Im talking about. I have depression (not from being adopted, its a genetic thing) and bi polar disorder. Does this mean Im miserable? Nope. Im one of the happiest people I know. Am I also borderline suicidal? Yep...I am, have been, was. Im also a recovering addict. Does this mean Im defined as an addict. Nope. Im so deep you could jump in and never ever ever reach the bottom of me.
Anonymous2011-03-29T11:57:47Z
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It's easier for people to perceive adoptees based on stereotypes and assumptions because, unless you're adopted, you don't actually know what it is like. People like to think they do, but they don't. Being adopted is just as much a part of my life as being a woman and a mother is. It has shaped the way I see things and the world around me. If more people understood how adoption is for us as they understand their own unique life circumstances and how those things are for them, they'd be less judgmental and perhaps even begin to treat adoptees the way they themselves would want to be treated.
I am so used to hearing the stereotypes at this point in my life; I have grown used to it. I try very hard to understand the issues that other people face and it's sad when they cannot do the same for others. But that is their decision.
Lol....If they see us as one dimensional beings, defined by one single part of who we are, it is easier to dismiss how we feel, its also easy to dismiss the possibility that they are choosing to contribute to others feeling the same way. It should be fairly obvious to anyone with half an ounce of logic that like most people, the adoptees on here live relatively normal lives...........there are so many hours in a day that we dont spend on here. I know that I, and several others, have repeatedly attempted to state clearly that I am, in general, a very happy well rounded person..........I have come to the conclusion that many on here only read what they want to hear......and when the post is from an adult adoptee, that isnt very much.
Why do some people assume anything... ignorance. Just consider the source or not, since we don't know anymore about those people than they know about us. Trolls are everywhere, but most of the time you will get a bit of understanding from those on here. It's kind of nice to be anonymous and open up - take the good, ignore the shallow or mean. They don't get it.
Not speaking to you specifically, but there are several adoptees on here who claim that they'd rather have been aborted, that they are in utter agony and misery due to adoption. Then I'm supposed to believe that they lead perfectly happy lives? Sorry, people who are in utter agony and misery don't have happy lives. One side or the other is exaggerated. BTW, this isn't me reading into people's statements. I've seen the same adoptees on one post say that they are in misery, then in another post say they lead a wonderful life. It just leaves me scratching my head because I can't see how someone could have it both ways.
Either you are miserable or you aren't. I can accept that someone is in utter misery and agony. I can accept that someone leads a happy life. I can accept that someone has some dichotomy of feelings, somewhere in the middle. But I can't understand how someone can claim to be at both extremes of the spectrum at the same time. Just doesn't make sense to me.