Failure at life?
I'm 18, overweight, live in a poor household (financially and figuratively), have never had a girlfriend or job, I think about suicide all the time and I'm no good at anything. Any important test in life I've either failed or JUST barely passed. I dropped out of high school as a senior. I needed 24 credits to graduate and at the end of the 1st semester of my senior year (January 2014), I only had 11. I went to get my GED, I only passed 2 of the 6 tests. I tried again a month later, I passed 3. I can't drive, I failed hunters safety, I know I'm depressed by my parents won't do a thing about it. I have no motivation. The last time I was truly happy was 3 years when my professional sports team made the playoffs.
I don't know what to do anymore. All my friends from school are off to college and enjoying life. My best best friend (and crush) is planning on going to Europe for college and I can't imagine not seeing her or hanging out with her. I don't believe in god, and I'm about ready to throw in the towel. Anytime anything good happens in my life, something horrible happens to counterbalance it.
I've been to more funerals in my life than my dad has and he's 54. I'm just ready to be done. People say once you hit rock bottom, the only place you can go is up. That's not true. You can stay at rock bottom and be stuck there.
What am I supposed to do with my life? What can I do?