Can you explain this from my ex to me? Answer and I'll answer 1 for you!?
My ex and I broke up 5 months ago. We barely talked since until last week when we met to give each other our stuff back and we talked the next day again. She first said she didn't want to get back together, but later said she didn't know if she could take another break up, told me she would have said yes to a proposal before we broke up, said she still thinks of me everyday and writes in a journal every time she wants to call and text me, and brought me back a bracelet from her study abroad months after our breakup. Part of me wants to get back together and part wants to stay broken up but its confusing hearing her say she doesn't want to get back together 1 min. and later saying she would have said yes to a proposal and she still thinks of me everyday.
Anonymous2018-03-12T23:04:12Z
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Breaking up is really very hard to do. With breakup comes conflicting feelings of longing for the relationship that we once had, but which we know in our heart no longer exists. I think you are in that place right now. It’s just so hard to say good-bye, along with some great memories. It’s bittersweet at times.
There are various reasons why couples who know they should break up seem to want to gravitate back together. Let’s look st some of them:
1. We have to make some changes in our lives. Instead of being a couple and being together, you no longer are. The can mean a huge shift in many aspects of your life, including your mutual friends, places you go, and things you do. It’s a huge adjustment.
2. Some people are afraid of being alone after breaking up. Once regularly with one person, they suddenly find that their social life has changed. You may= find that you’re sitting at home alone on a Saturday night instead of going out with a girlfriend.
3. Fear of the unknown. Will I get another partner? How long will it take? Will I like the new girl as much as the ex? Will I get along with her? Will she cheat on me? A whole host of questions go through our mind.
4. You may feel you’ve invested a lot of time and energy into your relationship and feel you don’t want to let it go. If you date somebody for a long time, that certainly can be a dilemma.
5. Worrying about what others might think of you.
6. Once again, longing for the past that you may realize you can never return to. Sometimes we want to relive the days when we fell in love with a person. However, sometimes we just have to let go of the past and move forward. It may be time to follow a new path in the dating world.
Your ex is an ex for a reason. Things don’t always go according to our expectations. I know what that feels like. My ex and I had even talked about getting married just a couple of months before we broke up for good.
Of course your girlfriend will think of you. She’ll always think of you. I’ve been married now for 12 years and I still think about the guy who broke it off with me before I met the guy who would eventually become my husband. You’ll never forget your exes, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t or shouldn’t move on. Let her go. Start dating other girls and let your ex be a pleasant memory of your past. I just know you’ll find somebody new to fill your heart.
It just means that neither of you has fully processed this loss. Look, anytime you are considering getting back together with someone, you have to honestly ask yourself whether or not the reasons for the breakup are still valid and still in existence. If they are, then no amount of wishful longing is going to fix things.
The answer is 'No'. Don't waste your time with somebody you can't figure out and only makes you confused, and gives you false hope. It's an automatic no if she doesn't know what she wants. If she truly wanted you, she would have said something like, "Hey, let's talk this over. I would like to try again if you're interested." At least then, she's confirming that she still likes you, but wants you to give the green light if you're interested.
The same is also with you. A part of your wants to be with her again. 'A part of you' doesn't cut it, because if you do get back wit her, you'll only be halfway in it mentally.
**EDIT** Don't worry. I haven't asked a question in months. :)