sex with my wife is really boring...?

I don´t believe good sex is about roleplaying, positions or toys. Sex is about passion. You love each other, but are you still attracted? Why don`t you try a sex-free month and see if it awakenes the passion that you (I assume) used to have for each other. Sex should be about not being able to keep your hands off each other, not a boring duty. And passion comes from within, not in the form of some toy. I know all this to be true because I`ve been married for 20 years and although there`s been boring times, our initial attraction to each other has kept us coming back for more. If you are really crazy about each other, the passion will come back. Maybe you should just trust in that.

Here's what you need to do: Go away for about 2 weeks. Go fishing, a camping trip, or something like that where there is no women. This time will give you the chance to miss your wife and her the same! And when you come back, you will want each other again.

I know this from experience because my husband is in the Army. When he goes to the field, he is usually gone for about 2 weeks at a time. In the beginning it is nice that he is gone because I don't have to do so much cooking and cleaning but after about a week, I start to miss him and sex. When we reunite, the sex is WONDERFUL! Very intimate and fulfilling.

If that doesn't work, go to a Sex Toy Party and get a new toy to play with... Have fun!

this is why I posted my question....I have been there...went from having sex about 3 times a week to once a week and that was satisfying but far from fun...toys don't help, positions are fun, but the element of desire and fun has to be there to get the connection. I would say spend more time on connecting outside of the bedroom and discovering why you like each other...in other words: play. when you are having fun with your wife in other ways, maybe the sex thing will take the same direction.

Sounds like you both are stuck in a rut. Maybe your both are trying to hard. Maybe that's the problem you guys are just having sex and not making love, big difference. Sounds like there is no romance just sex. Instead of concentrating on sex try concentrating on romance. Candle light dinners an evening out at a real nice restruant. Try just spending some quality time together.

Why is roleplaying out of the question? When it comes to your sex life, you both have to have an open mind and be willing to try anything...no matter how silly it may seem. But here are some tips I found online:

Make a date night "Married couples should never stop courting," says Paget. Pick a time and consider it a treat -- not one more thing on your to-do list. Think it's a downer to plan for sex? News flash: You basically always did. "A lot of what seemed like spontaneous sex, really wasn't. You had it on dates, weekends, vacation -- times you knew it would happen," she explains. "Planned sex can still be hot sex."

Get busy anywhere but your bed Using the dining room table for something other than dining adds variety, but there's another reason to ditch the bedroom: "One of my new-mom clients said that she was always so tired that anytime she hit the mattress, she just wanted to sleep!" says Paget.

Try spontaneous hugging Try this hug hint: Sneak up behind your husband and wrap your arms around him, says Paget. "Men have 'breast receptors' all over their bodies," she says with a laugh. "Your chest feels great against his back -- it's a big turn-on."

Use the past as an aphrodisiac Not a fan of talking dirty? Take a stroll down your shared sexual memory lane with your husband instead. "All it has to be is, 'Remember when you did X?'" says Paget. It's likely to get you a repeat performance.

Stop focusing on the big O "Rediscover the bases!" says Paget. Take the pressure off by seeing how good you can make each other feel without any "goal" in mind.

Surprise him in the shower Kids are unlikely to be suspicious of Mom and Dad being in the bathroom together in the morning. And if you both shampoo too, it's a timesaver!

Dip into your kids' toy chest You paid for all those board games -- why not borrow them and play strip versions?

Share a fantasy Not only is curiosity sexy, it also has the power to shift your relationship, says Paget. "Too many people have 'psychic sex,'" she explains. "They think they know what the other person wants, when often they may be hiding the same desires."

Type up a turn-on Sending a racy e-mail or text message to your husband takes seconds -- and unless your little one is a prodigy, she won't be able to read it!

Build anticipation As your husband is walking out the door in the morning, tell him what you can't wait to do with him that night, says Paget. (Use code words so your kids won't understand.) The two of you will feel excited all day.

Recreate your first dates Bring back the initial lust you felt by revisiting the spots you went to in the beginning of your relationship. Or if you've moved since then, at least bring back that level of creativity when you go out, says Paget. "The key is to pay that much attention to your mate," she explains.

Break your patterns If you do moves in a certain order in bed, change it up! "Or set rules, like hands or mouth only tonight," says Paget.

Get book smart Buy a book of new sexual positions, curl up on the couch with your husband and ask if there are some he'd like to try. "Men are used to being the ones who have to approach women, and they never forget the sting of rejection," says Paget. "He'll love it if you take initiative."

Ignore the clock Stop viewing sex as a nighttime activity, advises Paget: "You may be too tired to do it then anyway!" Fooling around on a Saturday afternoon while your child takes a nap can be very steamy.

Get him in a liplock Everyday intimate gestures are key to a sizzling sex life, says Paget, and kissing is the number-one thing that turns women on. "Pull him close and say, 'I adore kissing you,'" she says.

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1- Put her on the washer

Somehow the rumor got started that the vibrations of a washing machine make women orgasm. Whether or not this is true isn't as important as the fact that women seem to find the sensation agreeable, so why not give it a try? Maybe someday an enterprising company will make a washer with a seat on top specially for this purpose.

And if you don't have your own washer, you can still pull this off. Just take her to a Laundromat at a time when no one's likely to walk in with a load of whites.

2- Go on the roof

The element of danger or of being seen can make this quite exciting. If possible, climb out there on a warm, quiet night, bring a bottle of wine and a blanket and start out with a mini picnic. If you don't have roof access, bring a blanket out to the balcony and have sex there instead.

3- Do it on the staircase

The stairs are another popular place to have sex. You can stand her up against the banister or take her doggy-style on the steps. She can ride you while you sit down. This is your one chance to use the geometry you learned in school.

And if you live in an apartment, you can always track down a secluded set of steps in your building (the fire escape) and leave your mark on them.

4- Do it in the pool

The thrill of getting caught is alive and well, and the pool is the perfect place to test that theory. Take your girl into the shallow end of the water where both your feet touch the ground so you can easily maneuver into her. Or you can hang onto the ladder or the diving board in the deep end while she straddles you.

think of it like this, the sex with you and another woman at this point would get boring too. give it time. if you really love her then just deal with it. me and my ex used to have sex at least 7 times a day. we got divorced and now i want it all the time. now he is holding me back. but i love him so i will get it when he wants to give it to me. i dont pressure him at all.i keep trying to tell myself sex isnt the only thing in a relationship. i know its some of it but it doesnt make me love him less because we dont have sex. its so much more worth it when i do get it. masterbation does get old but it does get me through when he wont give it to me. you will both connect on the same level eventually.

good luck. if you would like to talk then look me up.

You have a checklist? You said you tried 17 positions? Do you record this information on a spreadsheet? If so, therein lies your problem, you treat sex as a chore not as a spontanious moment of plesure for both.

Set yourself a challenge, see how much pleasure you can bring to your wife, and you may find it turns you on more.

Just stop having sex for a while. If you feel you have to do it regularly, it becomes a chore. Just lay off getting laid for a while, and wait for the natural animalistic urgency to return. I guarantee after two or three weeks without sex, you and she will be going at each other like wild animals, tearing each other's clothes off.

ok bud heres the answer , go get a hooker , take a chance on getting AIDS herpes and all the other fun stuff , Maybe then your wife might just not be so boring . God if its a job to make love to your wife , you better pack the bags and move to greener fields

Sounds like you are trying to hard. Who keeps track of how many positions they have tried? Just love each other. There is more to making love than positions.