The facts of life. why do we sugercoat everything?

Keep them as children as long as possible. So what it is a lie, it is only a 'white lie' to tell children about Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy and such. Tell them old stories of Jack and the Beanstalk, the Three Pigs and all the others. They will know that they are not true without you telling them so. Find a dead animal and explain about death and 'heaven', whether or not you believe. Keep them young and as they ask questions, tell them a little at a time, then distract them from the question and wait until they ask you again when you can tell them a little more. Children have wonderful imaginations and will know, as you do now, that it is done to 'protect' them from a harsh world. For instance, if one of your children ask 'where do babies come from'. You answer them 'from mummy's tummy' and change the subject. It will be totally accepted by the child who will probably ask 'how did it get there' a few months later, having thought about it. You do not have to give them all the gory details at the same time. Good luck and God bless.................

Tell them when you think they'll understand. And don't make it depressing. Make it happy. If you need to, change YOUR views. Death, for example. Don't tell them that they don't get to see their friend or relative anymore. Tell them that they went on to a better place with free Ice Cream and big fields where they can play catch, and whenever it rains, it only rains a little, and it's warm and fun. the fields all have grass, their's some woods out back for people to play Hide And Seek in. There's a big city, too, where everyone goes to spend the night.

Something like that. Paint a nice picture for them, not the whole 'Angles with Wings on a cloud' thing.

It helps let them move on. Tell them they'll go to that nice place, too, but they have to wait a long time, because when you go, you can't come back, and you'd be sad if you couldn't see them for a long time.

This isn't a 'step-by-step'. This is a suggestion that you should put your own twist on.

Hope it helps.

You let them know that life is dealing with the events that life throws in front of you.

Pets die, firends move away, you get your heart borken.

The shock of this has to sink in sooner or later, but i would personally ait until some event happens (a grandparent dying) to tell the story.

I was 16 when my grandfather died and I still felt creepy about it. You never get ready for the Big Nap.

Personally, I believe more harm is done by sugar coating and avoiding hard topics because children have the added burden of knowing someone they should have been able to depend on basically lied to them. I'm not suggesting blurt out horrible things, but making up imaginary stuff and pretending a child is not capable of having grief is potentially detrimental.

http://www.glencoe.com/sec/family_consumer_science...

Strange, I've never sugarcoated anything I've told my children. They have known the facts of life as soon as they were old enough to comprehend. That was about two years old. All have grown up very well-adjusted and mature. I'm sorry things were hidden from you as you grew. That was wrong.

Make it a short-honest speech.

You're not going to make a difference in this world and you will amount to nothing, we will all die one day so stop bitching.

-Fin

I told my kids that and its done wonders.

Let them have a chance to see true events around!