What can I do to help this friend?

Encourage her to seek treatment. She needs and deserves support, and you need and deserve a break, and to know she's in good hands!

People diagnosed with borderline personality disorder live in a world of inner and outer turmoil. They have difficulty regulating their emotions and are often in a state of upheaval. They have distorted images of themselves, often feeling worthless and fundamentally bad or damaged.

And while they yearn for loving relationships, people with borderline personality disorder typically find that their anger, impulsivity, stormy attachments and frequent mood swings push others away.

Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) was designed specifically to treat the disorder. DBT uses a skills-based approach to teach people how to regulate their emotions, tolerate distress and improve relationships.

http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_sea...

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/bpd.cfm

http://www.borderlinepersonalitytoday.com/main/

http://www.bpdcentral.com/

That is exactly what a person with Borderline Personality Disorder is...draining...always staging suicidal gestures so someone needs to 'rescue' them...playing on people's guilt about 'abandonment' to force them to maintain friendships...They don't change; this will go on and on and on forever. You can't do anything to help, all you can do is allow yourself to be dragged down with her or not. You need to ditch her...which will probably lead to a very dramatic suicidal gesture, or her cutting off one of her fingers or something...not your fault or your problem. The alternative is just being drained. Then someday you will have a family of your own, spouse and kids, and they will be affected by all this poison you have allowed into your life. You can't help her; it is her choice to seek professional help or not. I suggest taking the time to collect a few cards from competent mental health professionals, hand them to her, change your phone number, and don't answer your door. Even on the off chance she really manages to kill herself, it's not your fault.

Seeking treatment for her is a necessity... otherwise you will have to seek some of your own. Sometimes, people need to be taken care of by someone else... when she's better... or is starting to get some help... she wont be as reliant on you.

Remember this as a lesson that many people in life are draining and you must protect your energy from being drained dry. Its about your health not just hers.

Feel free to chat if you'd like.

~Dani

breathofvitality@yahoo.com

i know how draining it can be. i've been through it with a friend. whatever happens you have to make sure you keep a safe distance. you can be there for her and support her, but don't let her drag you down too. if she says she's going to hurt herself don't try to stop her yourself. tell a professional and they can deal with it. suicide info can be turned over to the cops and they can take her to get medical help. it sounds like she should be getting more medical help than what she's recieving. you don't need to abandon her, just make sure you take care of yourself first.

Step away from the psyco and get your own life in order. She is not gonna committ suicide because you have a life. If she does it is not your fault. You could be just the audience she needs for her drama queen routine. Tell her to get professional help that is what she needs and you are not equipped to help her. If she is sane enough to threaten you with what might happen if you "abandon" her she is sane enough to get herself to a shrink.

You cannot save her. You are not equipped to give her the help and support she needs. You can allow her to drain your energy and to stop you from living your own life. Do Not Allow It

You are right in that you cannot continue to let her drain you like this. I made a similar mistake once- and lived to regret it. Never again!

Your friend needs some long-term care. Encourage her to seek it.

Good luck!

You and your friend both seem to be in trouble. I would try and tell her to seek Medical Help. You have the right to lead your own life without having to look over your friends. Help her and be there when she needs you but always have time for yourself.

Good-Luck

she needs professional help.

Plus she needs Jesus.

Jesus is my Lord and Savior and rescued me from what felt like the depths of dispair.

she really wants to live other wise she wouldn't call anyone

God wants us to have joy in our lives

Jesus is the Way

while i dont support you for rescuing her (wat the **** were u thinking?) you should let her be.. eventually you will get tired of feeling all that anger and u know.. like **** im her friend but i cant keep carrying the wagon.. it sucks... nothing personal but if she tries to kill herself then dont save her... i mean i cant stand plp caring for others while the person ahs sumthing really wrong with them... godamn ur like the person that says that its k to run this car even though its gonna keep ******* up on me.. just learn to accept and move on. while u may feel bad about it at first ul eventaully learn to let go. theres nothing wrong with letting go.. do the right thing and let go... give her peace...

I'd try to get her help on a regular basis. Does she have a doc. or counselor?