What should you do when you learn that your 14 year old son has started to smoke?

Smoking is self sabotage. Is this learned behavior from a peer?

I'd have a heart to heart and ask what's eating at him to make him smoke.

Maybe he's stressed out, depressed, or is trying to be liked by his peer group.

When my son started, he was being teased, and harassed by a negative peer group in the neighborhood.

Whatever you do, don't shame him. He's already living with some sort of guilt. Try and get him to ask himself where, why , what and when?? These are important things for him to figure out so he may find a solution to quit.

I agree with SJ. If you make him smoke the whole pack, like many parents have done in the past, he'll be so sick from it he'll never want to smoke again. Tell him since you know he wants to smoke so badly, you're going to give him the opportunity to do as much smoking as he'd like right now, while you both sit there. Tell him that will be the punishment if you ever find out he's smoking again. And trust me, as an ex smoker, that would not even be the least bit appealing. That along with being completely grounded is what you should do.

Create consequences for smoking. If he comes home smelling like smoke or Axe deodorant punish him. Also the source of the money needs to be cut off. Cigarettes are expensive, and the money more than likely comes from you.

Have you ever talked to him, not just commented on it, but really talked to him about how bad smoking is? If not you need to do that as well.

I dont have any children, but if I had one and find that he/ she has started smoking, I would definitely have a serious conversation with him/ her. I will watch him closely and make sure he doesnt smoke or I will cut down his spending or not letting him to hang out with his friends for a few days.

LET HIM KNOW THAT U KNOW, REMIND HIM THAT SMOKING IS NOT GOOD FOR U, FIND OUT WHERE IS HE GETTING THEM FROM. TELL HIM TO STOP IF HE DONT U WILL GROUND HIM AND TAKE AWAY HIS ALLOWANCE. IF HE HAVE EXTRA MONEY TO GET SOME SMOKES, U R GIVING HIM TOO MUCH ALLOWANCE....... TAKE IT LOWER

since he wants to smoke make him smoke the whole pack...till he says im srry i wont smoke anymore

Find out where he's getting the funds to buy cigarettes. They dont come cheap!

kick him in the ***. I am 43 and wish i would have never started i am starting to feel it now.

I'm not sure. I know what you shouldn't do. Don't tell him not to do it, 'cause teenagers have the tendency to want to exactly what their parents tell them not to do. I hope this helps you!

i have to check my relationship with him first ofall and explain to him the damage he is doing for himself