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After 25 years of marriage, my husband was diagnoised with AIDS.?

Update:

I only found out because he was so sick, he could no longer hide it. It took over one year for him to tell me the truth about how he obtained it. I have forgiven him, and we are still together; but now he is being highly critical of me, and is talking mean to me a lot for little things. I love him, and I want to support him, but It is getting harder and harder. How can I get him back to being the loving and easy to get along with person he used to be?

23 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It must be getting difficult for him to cope with the stress and the disease, so please be easy on him. Afterall it's difficult for any man to handle AIDS, ask him politely to repent. Give him a copy of translation of Quran (Holy book of Islam) and hopefully the Words of God will calm him down. He has all the time to contemplate on his life, and his destiny and afterlife. So talk to him about God and calm him down with life after death.

  • 1 decade ago

    I am so sorry to see your plight, and I hope you are free of this terrible virus. I know that the implications of this news are great and as a Gay Man I know only too well the thoughts thata re going through your mind at the moment, but I think you should talk to people about this and share your fears. I have been so blessed that I should also be diagnosed with this illness but for some reason I am free, I can only put this down to my lifestyle and the fact that I only have monogamous relationships,but I have lost friends. Also being diagnosed as HIV does not mean that your husband has a death sentence on him , with new therapies he could go on to live a relatively normal life span ,so don't despair I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

  • 1 decade ago

    You have been truly unfortunate. However, you are not alone; research has indicated that about 60% of men and 40% of women cheat on their marriage vows. Your husband could have gotten this via sharing IV needles, but probably he was having sex outside of your marriage.

    Be certain to get tested yourself. And find a support group through your local AIDS services organization.

    ADDED AFTER READING YOUR ADDITIONAL INFO:

    HIV can effect brain functioning, and your husbands attitude may be related to stress, from HIV's effect, from side effects of the meds, or from other pressures within the marriage. I encourage you to find a qualified marriage counselor to help you find alternative ways to deal with the changes in your marriage.

    And by the way, from the way you initially asked the question, it seems to me that you've not yet fully forgiven him for the way he got infected with HIV.

  • Now tell us exactly, what doctors said.... In the meantime start him on very large quantities of vitamin C at least 1500 mg 3 times a day... Do not let him aproach You without using a condom for insrtance.....When you know the cause of the contamination you can easily have become seropositive as we say..... As a woman, your umpteen times more vulnerable to the HIV infection as a man.

    Aids also hits innocent husbands you know...... You have a lot to talk about you and your husband... Seek council from who you trust the most........

    Source(s): It must be devastating to a woman after so many years of marriage, to finrd out the truth about the dangers of infection... Guilt speeds up the process of rearranging the human recombinant in a lesser variant/...
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  • 1 decade ago

    I'm not sure what your question is, however, it doesn't necessarily mean that he had been with someone else. It could also mean that he got a blood transfusion and got AIDS from tainted blood or from a dirty needle when he went to get a shot or something like that. If your husband has been diagnosed with AIDS, then I would strongly suggest that you and your children, if you have any, go get tested for AIDS. If you have any grandchildren, they should be tested also.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    What is your question here? Did you know that today, there are more people living with aids and do not know it, then there are that have the disease and do know they have it? The culprit could very well be the misquito. His stinger is no different than a needle. I am sorry to hear about your husband, but through Jesus and the sacrifice He made for us, through Him, all things are possible, through Christ our Lord, and we shall ask Him to place His healing hands upon your Husband.

    God bless you

  • 1 decade ago

    Maybe he cheated on you with a man or a woman, maybe he did intraveneous drugs, and maybe he got it from a blood transfusion.

    You need to get tested to see if you are HIV positive.

    Then you probably should get into counseling to help process your emotions around this. . . .

    finally, you might consider couples counseling with your husband to reevaluate where the relationship is as apparently there may have been some failures to communicate on his part.

  • 1 decade ago

    OMG>>>I am so sorry for you both. Firstly, take care of yourself, have yourself checked and if you have kids have them checked if you think there is even the slightest chance you might be infected. Then, once you have taken care of your own needs you can deal with his and your marriage. Get some counseling, sounds like you and your family will need it....good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    Wow! was it from a transfusion or was he cheating? I would be freaking out. Have you been tested? I'm so sorry that this has happened to you and I wouldn't wish this on anyone. I wish you luck with your decision in staying in or leaving your marriage.

  • beek
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Will the judge of all the earth do wrong? Is He not also able to use this for His purposes.

    My heart goes out to you and may the Lord give you grace and wisdom.

    Sing those Gospel songs in your heart.

    Source(s): Romans 11:33 Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out!
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