So how would you punish them?

Taking the candy away and having the clerk throw it away was great... taking candy away until halloween is also great..

Now you need to think of a chore relatively difficult but not impossible for thier age and have them do the chose in restitution for thier crime... Explain to them that candy and other items cost money (the 3 year old will partially understand the 1.5 year old will not) tell them to make money adults work... and to pay for the candy bar they stole and you had to pay for they will work... then off they go dusting or washing a wall... even if you have to think of something that really isn't necessary it's important they make a work restitution... It will help cement in thier brains there is a price in time and work not only in not getting something when you steal...

When I was 7 yrs old I stole a candy bar from our local town market... My mother telephones the owner to tell him I would be returning to bring back the candy bar and she wanted him to have a suitable restitution job ready for me... When My mother and I arrived she made me do all the talking. I had to hand the owner the candy bar tell him I stole it and take my consequesces... I spent a good hour sweeping the floor at the market... I learned there was a price in labor for money.. I am now 36 so obviously the lesson has stuck with me, and I have never been tempted to steal again... I also made friends with owner... He never held my stealing against me, I was free to visit his store and make purchase without him looking over my shoulder... I had learned my lesson and payed my restitution...

No, I think you handled it just fine. Though you have to realize they didn't understand what they were doing was wrong, and likely still don't completely understand. You 3 year old probably apologized more because you were upset and he/she understood something was wrong- even though he/she isn't really clear what it was. They really just don't get the concept of personal property at that age, but you did good work on laying a foundation for him/her to learn. You will need to have a discussion about it, to explain about what belongs to other people vs. what belongs to us. I think this scene has played out for nearly every parent out there, and I also blame the supermarkets for arranging the displays the way they do. You can't exactly blame the little ones for grabbing, when it is designed to get their attention and be in easy reach. I would certainly speak to the store management about arranging at least on checkout without the candy in reach. You get busy trying to get the groceries, and you can't keep an eye on the toddlers at the same time with the same sort of vigilance you ordinarily do. It isn't to their benefit to have the candy disappear, and they were lucky you are the conscientious type parent. It's also not fair to put it all out there and expect a little one to leave it all alone, either. I don't know that I would deny them candy completely until Halloween, as they really didn't know they were doing something wrong until you told them, and the littlest one really doesn't understand at all. When you had the candy thrown away instead of just paying and fussing at them, you did make a pretty good statement to the 3 year old, so that could have been enough at the time. But if you want to stick with the decision, I can't say I find fault with that either. You have to make rules and stick with them. My guide for my own kids has been to correct the behavior if they honestly didn't know it was wrong, (your judgement there), and to identify the consequences if it was repeated. By taking the candy away, you did correct the behavior, and they did not profit from it. If you talk to the 3 year old and get him/her to understand about taking what doesn't belong to him/her, and what the punishment would be next time- I would think that was enough. Lucky at this age, they really don't understand time and calendars either. I would also have a word with the supermarket manager, though. They should make better arrangements.

I would be consistent with what you told them, like the others said...but I wouldn't have told them they were "bad" for stealing. You want to address the behavior, not the child. They're NOT bad...they just made a wrong choice. And the 1 1/2 yr old probably just followed what his (her?) big sister was doing. A toddler is too young to understand that something like that is wrong. Your 3-yr-old did make the choice to take the candy, but did even she know that it was wrong? Have you explained to your children that the food they see in the aisles is not for free? I've worked with many three-yr-olds (that was my class's age group I taught when I worked in daycare), and honestly, at that age, many of them just don't know things like that. This incident, however, was a perfect teachable moment. You did right in taking it away but I hope you explained to them why. Not giving them candy until Halloween is ok, since first of all, it's not that far off, and for another thing, that's a good way to ensure that they'll not do that again. But just be careful that you're not being too harsh. I'd just make sure in the future that your children are aware that what they're doing is wrong, before you automatically assume so, and discipline them for it. Good luck. :)

They are still very young to understand stealing something. Your 3 year old can get the idea, but may not put stealing together with taking something that looks good and is put at eye level for them to reach. How is it different in their mind from taking a candy bar off the kitchen table? Perhaps a little extreme, but lack of candy never hurt anyone. Keep an eye on them and perhaps next time while standing in line there can be a gentle reminder about what theft is.

First off, never call a child bad. Their BEHAVIOR may be bad, but don't label the CHILD as bad.

Personally, I don't think that the punishment is appropriate for this age group. It's too long term. They need an immediate consequence at this age. Especially the 1.5 year old. He's still a baby. He doesn't understand yet that you have to pay for things at the store, most likely. It's a HUGE temptation to see all that candy right where he can reach it. He also probably isn't even going to remember what happened in a couple of days.

I'd have taken the candy bars away and maybe had the manager talk to them about stealing. I'd make them appologize...not just to you but to the manager or someone from the store, afterall, they didn't steal from you. I'd have said that they won't have sweets/desserts that night, maybe for the weekend. I'd have told them that next time I go to the store, they won't be going with me.

I think the longer grounding could be appropriate for an older child who can understand the situation better, but it seems kind of extreme for this age group to me.

I think that you handled the situation very well. The little one may have trouble remembering why they are not allowed to have candy, but the worst thing you could do would be to give in and let them have candy before you said you would. I think the biggest thing to being a good parent is setting rules and then sticking by them. All kids do the wrong thing at times and you just have to deal with it. Taking the lollies off them that they had taken was the best way to deal with it as so many parents would just pay but then let them eat it and that just really says what they did was okay.

They are still pretty young. You have to give them the benefit of the doubt at this age. I think you handled it well. You let them know it was wrong so this should never happen again. If it does even if you are aginist spanking I would do it in this case. My kids 6 and 8 would get 5 swats with the paddle each for stealling now, plus an hour of corner time. Of course at that age it wouldn't be that extream. Be sure to stick to your word about no candy until Halloween.

sounds good to me. the 1 and a 1/2 year old might not yet be able to understand but the three year old needs to know that we pay for things at the store. the baby was probably just following the older one. I think you are right on. make sure to remind the children when they ask for candy why they are being denied.

i think you handled the situation right. Your 3yr old did apologize and the 1 yr old is too young to do that. I think it is a good idea to not give them any candy until Halloween. They need to know what they did was wrong. Good job Mom!

your children are just that children they see candy they do not know it is not for them to take so ease up on them and the check out is the worse its chock full of goodies a 3 yr old does not know what stealing is all about ..the term bad is a word that is too harsh forthese children bad and stealing these children are stll babies and you talk to them like they are 8yr olds..don't be so hard on them by denying them candy till halloween,,just tell them this stuff at the store does not belong to you so please do not touch it and mommie is the only person who will give you permission to touch something in the store so remember no touching anything that does not belong to you ....sureilll