best answer to the person who can tell me a joke that makes me laugh?

there were 3 little old ladies, getting their hair done, the subject got on to sex. myrtle says sex? pphhh haven't had that in 30 years, Ethel replys, my husband never looks at me anymore, i don't think he finds me sexy. Tillie looks at them both surprised. she says,,, i have sex 3 times a day and i am in my 90s.

so Ethel begs her please tell me your secret.

well Tillie says, all you have to do , is when he is in the bathroom getting ready for bed, you crawl in bed , put your legs up behind your head, when he walks in,,,,,,he will just dive right in.

so that night Ethel goes home, as her husband is getting ready for bed in the bathroom, she proceeds in crawling in bed, and working her legs up as high as she possibly can. then she waits, and waits , and waits. her husband finally comes in the room, and takes one look at her, and says :My God Ethel Put Your Teeth Back in.

Here's a few Rodney Dangerfield jokes for you!

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.

I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.

I tell you, I'm not a sexy guy. I was the centerfold for Playgirl magazine. The staples covered everything!

texas deputy VS. new york lawyer--- only in texas!!!A lawyer runs a stop sigh and gets pulled over by a sherif

Deputy says," license and registration please"

Lawyer says, "What for?"

Deputy "you didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."

lawyer "I slowed down and no one was coming"

Deputy" You still didn't come to a complete stop. license and registration, please.

lawyer' "what'sthe differance"?

deputy" the differance is, you have to come to a complete stop, that's the law. license and registration please"!

lawyer" If you can show me the legal difference between slowing down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go on my way, and don't give me the ticket."

deputy says:"that sounds fair, exit you're vehicle, sir.

at this point, the deputy takes out his night stick and starts beating the ever lovin crud out of the lawyer and says;

"Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?

Q.Guess who I saw today!!

A. Everyone I looked at

Alexis, I saw that on Yo Momma

What did one boob say to the other boob?

Quit hangin' so low. They'll think we're nuts!

Why did Tigger go to the bathroom?

To find Pooh!

What kind of ant smells the best?

A dedor-ant.

Yo mama is so nasty that she opened up her legs and said tuna surprise!

Once uon a time there was a girl, another girl, and another girl then they died.

yo car stink so much i thought i was in the twilight zone because it smelled like do,do,do,do,--------do,do,do,do-------------do,do,do,do

what do you call cheese that doesnt belong to you?

Nacho cheese!