Does our Indian society need change in some areas--like relationships and the values of women.??

Society has nothing to do with you and does not become happy or sad by your conduct. You decide yourself whether going to your 'true' partner will make you happy and whether he will still accept you or not. It appears that you do not trust your husband fully. That is a weak bond. Decide early, and do not procrastinate with pretexts like 'society' etc.

You might not realize it, but Indian culture and customs are invaluable. They preserve the moral fiber of Indian society. The world admires how the divorce rate in your country is almost negligible. Men try their very best to put family and wife before anyone else. (This is based on experience) There are exceptions of course. What needs to be changed, is the way in which "lovers" are not given the chance to be "heard". When women or even men, express their desire to marry the persons they love, then parents should give them the chance to speak up, even when there is someone whom they have in mind for their kids. Let the children have "their day in court", so to speak. Perhaps a compromise could be arrived at. It is still a democratic world, everybody should be given the chance to speak her or his own mind. That way, when they marry, it would be their choice and would not be "finding" their true partner only after being married.

As you have been cheated by your husband you should not feel bad to leave him. But does your boy friend feel for you as strongly as you do? Is he willing to marry you ? Divorces in India are very common. You will not find one family in which some member or the other is not separaed or divorced. People talk about it for a while and forget. Remarriages are happening every where.

The Indian society desperately needs a change. as for your example, its not just women but also men who need fair treatment. if one realizes that they have married a wrong person no mattter whether he is a man or a woman it is better to get separated thast to live a frustrated life.

but yes, even if they want to get seperated they should do so honestly without cheating their partners.

Even after seein the Westerns getting rotted every day in and out, do you want to ape them.

Western philosophy didn't survive a few decades (Amercians themselves are few hundreds old).

Whereas Indian Society in its own values have survived thousands of years. It got damaged a little because of the britishers who intruded for few hundred years.

Please stick to our values. Our values are older than the civilisation itself.

Do not regret in future.

Even in today's society she has recourse to divorce and remarriage.It is however true that society has to take stock of the current environment changing social values, especially after globalisation and its effects and take fresh look at the existing relations and traditions.

In Indian society I didn't think divorce was an option? I thought you could go back to live with your father or brothers but I did not think divorce was taken??? Has it changed since I was there last?

Yes but, without forgetting where you come from. I'm not Indian but, I see a lot of unhappiness coming from your question and other stories like it and worse. Personally, I don't admire a low divorce rate when looking into the reasons why divorce isn't very common. I think it's sad. Not that my culture is without it's problems of course.

I think you should continue the relationship with more people.

But dont leave your husband. It may damage your image.

Enjoy the life !

It is a good lesson for your husband.

Best of luck !

Mehbooba-ji, kya aap apne shauhar se qush nahi hay? Aisa bhi hosakta hay ki woh aap se qush na ho? Samjhauta hi iska hal hay, koshish tow karke dekhiye, ghar todna aasaan hay, ghar banana bahot mushkil hay, ji haan !