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Do you ever open your spouses mail? Does he/she mind?

Do you consider it an invasion of privacy to open their mail? Why or why not?

Do you consider it a crime? Why or why not?

19 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    it's up to each couple to set up the level of privacy they are comfortable with. generally speaking, i'd say that if there is something that concerns the two of you (finances, something regarding the kids, insurance, etc.) i'd say go right ahead and open it, especially if it's something that may require immediate attention.

    if it's a newsletter from his bowling team, or a letter from his long lost uncle jim, or (god forbid!) one of those gag letters with CONFIDENTIAL STD RESULTS stamped on the outside, then you'd best leave that up to the spouse to open.

    the deeper issue, i'd think, is how much you feel comfortable in sharing unknown things about each other, or in finding out things that might show up in the mail. would you feel comfortable reading each others' email? listening in on phone conversations?

    my wife has opened things addressed to 'us', and i don't mind if she opens things addressed to me. even though the mail service has made it criminal to tamper with mail, once it's in the slot, i think it's family property. not a crime to open it, but if he or she expresses a desire that you don't, you probably shouldn't.

    box of cookies in the mail, all bets are off.

  • Red
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    I hate it when the wife opens bills. I need to know that they have have come in and that I have read them.

    If she opens them they don't always get put where they can be found and she can never remember the due dates or amounts. Then I have to ask if we have gotten the bill when is it due and the amount.

    Not really a privacy issue.

    She still opens the mail, I still search for the last bill, just easier when I can do it myself.

  • 1 decade ago

    No I don't open his mail and he doesn't open mine. I wouldn't exactly call it a crime but I would call it an invasion of my privacy. I don't read his text messages on his cellphone either. Just because we're living together does not mean we are the same person.

  • 1 decade ago

    If it is your spouse's mail then it isn't a crime to open it. We open each others' mail. It isn't a big deal in our household. We don't have anything to hide from each other. We don't go through each others cell phone or wallet and purse. We consider that to be rudeness. We do have an open line of communication and if one of us feels that the relationship is headed for trouble we talk about it and try to resolve our problems before any other people get involved.

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  • Lydia
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    I open it all the time. He doesn't mind. It isn't an invasion of privacy, because we have no "secrets". Of course it is not a crime. If it's a personal letter, I would leave it for him to open.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I only open bills and things like that...I would never open a letter or a card or anything that I couldn't identify.....And he wouldn't do that to me either....It's not that either of us has anything to hide from the other...it's an issue of privacy and respect......No matter how much you love one another, everyone needs to have their own space.....and that includes some things that are private...now if I thought he were cheating on me........you figure that out for yourself.....good luck

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it's ok. But, how do you feel if he opens yours? Remember, we all like to get mail. It is for us personally. We want to tell you what it says as soon as we open it. If we find our mail open we think you don't trust us or your just plain intrusive. I think it's best left unopened if you never discussed it before. Something that always works is the question; Do you want me to open 'THE MAIL"?

    Source(s): Life
  • 1 decade ago

    Yes i open my husband mail and i used to have an ex-boyfriend who would freak if I opened his mail (I think he was cheating). My husband does not have a problem with it cause he has nothing to hide and neither do i for that matter so yes he opens mine too. good luck and god bless and happy holidays.

  • 1 decade ago

    I open up all the mail except if its addressed to only my husband(like birthday card etc.)but I pay all the bills so I open the mail,he opens it up if he picks it up and then hands everything to me,so it is easier if I just open it up to begin with

  • 1 decade ago

    I don't think it's a crime but I feel that any personal letters/cards/etc...should be left for him to open. Bills are shared even if they are addressed to one or the other and aren't as personal.

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