Am I reading too much into this?

Question

I posted this question yesterday  :I just had a date with this guy I really like and I think/ thought that he likes me too. So we're saying good-bye, and I thought that he was going to kiss me, but when I leaned in to meet him, he said, "Not yet."  What does this mean? Does this mean I messed up enitirely?

And I freaked myself out about the situation, and ended up asking him via IM if we were OK, and he was like, "We're all good." But it felt different (the vibe was off, at least I felt it was), so I asked him if I was bothering him, and he said no, that he was playing a game.  The conversation went on, but he was still quiet, and I asked if I could ask him something (about the night before--see above question)...He said sure.  A little time went by, and he's like..."or not.  hey, i'm getting out of here.  i will talk with you later."

Am I reading too much into things?  Did I freak him out?  If so, how can I undo the damage?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It was a date. So yes you're reading to much into it .... not everyone wants to get physical ASAP! Still if you want him ...the tease is sure to please. Just find another guy ..go out ..if the one you want calls tell him sorry I am doing something that night, can we do it another time. Suddenly he will understand you're not just sitting around waiting for his kiss. If he does not call ..let it go. Move on. Point to remember ... If a guy holds your hand a lot ..a kiss May be more expected ...if he isn't all touchy feely ...do not be surprised if he wants to go slow. it may be he is not interested, shy or thinks kissing is for later. Let him set the tone. But watch out ..too much kissing will unlock more than just your heart.

Missy Lyons · Answer

First off you are over analyzing--he sounds like he is not interested at all. He ahd a chance and he did not take it. However, if he was just nervous--you are not making it any easier for him by analyzing his and your every move. 

Guys are very visual and would prefer to react to visual stimuli...You may be able to undo damage by playing around being fun with him still, flirt, but don't push him to kiss or touch. Sometimes it takes time to get into the other person's space if you ever end up in that zone...Some people have more defensive walls up than other people and hugging or kissing is too much for them to do right away, be patient but I would also not get your hopes up.

Good luck!

D N · Answer

You need to learn about "backing off" and not being pushy.  Guys don't like to be pushed, put on the spot or not take the lead in giving the first kiss.  Don't make a mess of things, let him take the lead.  Don't IM or email him, let him make the moves.

Princess Purple · Answer

Well it seems like you are thinking about this WAY too much. 

Don't worry about it too much.  He doesn't sound very interested.

Right now, the best thing you could do is just to leave it as it is and chill out some.

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Am I reading too much into this?

4 Answers