my husband of 14 years is having a baby with 17 year old girl who is a former night club worker.?

Not only has your husband cheated on you ...he has robbed his family..

Because of his cheating he will now rob his family of some of its income. In some states it will be 25% of his gross income...

To simplify things.. lets say his income is $2,000 per month.. she will get 25% which is $500.. now look at it again because you know uncle Sam takes his cut too.. So say his take home is $1500... Your family income has been reduced down to $1,000 because he let his little horse out of the barn...

This is what I mean by robbing his family of their future....

If he stays with "his family".. he will have to send this child by her to college "before his children"... however, if you divorce him.. your children came first and he will "have" to provide for their educations first...

See how stupid cheating men are??? It is not a matter of just hurting your heart.. it is a matter of what he has done to his family.

If you keep him.. make him get a second job so "your" family does not have to do with less for the next 22 yrs.

GOOD LUCK

14 years is a long time but you have to think, in the last 14 years how many times could have it been possible he was cheating with other women and is just now getting caught? You also have to think of what example you'll be setting for your children and how you want them to look at you in their later years. Are you willing to accept the fact your husband will have another family in his life? Can the new child possibly be part of your family? In all honesty because of the circumstances I would recommend that you try a temporary separation until you have come to a decision whether or not you're willing make these drastic changes in your own life and in your children's lives. I would ask your husband for privacy until you have decided so that you aren't influenced in any wrong ways by him.

I think you already know the answer to your delima. So... your husband is now banging a girl that was just three years old when you two got married. Not blaming you here but methinks your husband was terribly bored in your relationship and along come a hot piece of tail that bats those baby blues at him and he falls for it hook, line & sinker. But... he's an adult and was fully aware of what he was doing. He's banging some VERY fertile young woman and he doesn't even bother to wear any protection. AND she doesn't make him. He may be giving her a baby, but what did she get from him? And what is he going to give to you? Condoms are more than just birth control.

If you stay with this guy...... think about this, how are you going to feel every time you have to look at his other baby or hear about it? What will you be thinking when he goes to visit his child? Remember, he's also tied to another woman now. He made his bed, now it's his to lie in.

That sounds like a miserable situation! I would seek the input of a marriage therapist. In the meantime, he needs to move out. You can't properly grieve if he's still there. Your relationship has some serious trust issues and probably lots of other problems that will need to be broughtout an dealt with. If you both REALLY love each other than you'l find a way. If it's co-dependancy...you need to let go. Good luck!

First of all his first priority is you and your children then

when the other child is born his priority is you and all

three children. One thing he must do is make a decision

to either stay with you and yours or live with the other,

and you also will have to make that decision do you want

him to stay with you or move with the other: If he stays

with you he will definately intermingle with the other mom

as he is the dad, so now it comes down to WHAT DO

YOU WANT???????. Since he messed up and not you

you need to decide what you want in life that would make

you happy and what is best for your children: He still can

make you happy and be faithful to you but since a 17 yr

old is involved well need I say more: If you want your

marriage to work you will have to lay down the rules and

tell him directly to his face eye to eye contact and tell him

what he must do in order to accept him back into your

life and into the childrens life, but you also must keep in

mind there is another child now that you have to accept

into your life as it is his. That is why it is important for you

to decide what will make you happy and what is best for

your children and go from there. Good luck.

He told you he loves you, but wants you to accept the fact that he loves her? I think it is pretty selfish of him to ask that of you. He needs to make a decision, you or her, he can't have it both ways. If he chooses you, get counseling. You will need it if you have any hope of resolving your issues with him. If he chooses her, he needs to get out. He can pay child support without having to be with her. Sounds like he is using that as a convenient excuse. Personally, I wouldn't want him back. He cheats on you once, he is likely to do it again, and it will be much harder to leave him the second time around. I really feel for you and good luck with your decision

Sounds like he's the one who is confused...and it's a shame that innocent children--your 2 and the new one will be hurt, along with you. Perhaps counseling and spiritual guidance may help to ease your pain. Will you be better off without him than with him? Consider all the pain and constant reminders of his cheating you will have to deal with from now on, if you stay. But lots of women do find a way to cope.

All the best to you and your family.

u have to accept what he has told u, he will be supporting this child, and he will be in this child's life, so will the mother. if he is going to be in their life, he will be cheating. he loves this woman, but maybe he doesn't want to pay child support, or split the as setts, but if u feel no love, than there isn't any. best to take your hurts once, meaning not to stick around, as through the years he is just going to hurt u more. if affairs produce children there is no chance of forgetting it, he will be tied to her forever because of the child. best to get out of it, no matter how it hurts, to avoid more hurts. he tells u he loves u now, but could be he just hasn't made his plans with this woman yet and isn't ready to go. the woman is going to be there tugging on his heart, giving him ultimatums making demands till he eventually does go, he just isn't ready yet. would be wise to plan for a divorce, as the longer u stay in a situation like this the more your self respect will suffer, and he is going to leave one day anyway, better to get it over with now, the sooner its over the sooner u can begin to heal. good luck and god bless

First, for his sake, you better hope you don’t live in a state where the age of sexual consent is 18.

Second, he’s definitely right about one thing, it IS his obligation (and legal responsibility) to support the child if the child is in fact his. But, I’d certainly urge him to request a paternity test.

Third, and you didn’t mention this at all—is the affair with this little girl OVER?

In actual words you would like to get rid of this new head ache, is'nt it? File a Police case against your husband for having illegal relationship and ask for divorce and compensation. Also inform all your relatives and put some pressure on him either to shut the door for new ***** or he and only he will be responsible for spoiling the life and carreer of his so called lovely kids. Do'nt compromise at any cost or you will make your life misserable. Fight tooth and nail for your survival, also take some help of NGO's/Nari sansatha and push out the ***** from the life your husband. Take him on the street and make him naked.

Note:Your own safety and children safety is of ut most importance hence Register your case and haire an advocate, push them to the wall.

Don't loose your courage, if possible send me your actual email id

Thanks