What's your favourite "Quote" or Oneliner?

'I refuse to have a battle of wits with someone who is unarmed'

-My Dad!

What's your favorite breed of all? Rottweiler Favorite you've never owned? many, I am still young. Bull terrier Favorite breed you would never own? Rough Collie Favorite dog under 15 lbs? Pug Favorite between 15 lbs and 50 lbs? French Bulldog Favorite between 50 lbs and 100 lbs? Giant Schnauzer Favorite over 100 lbs? Great Dane Favorite dog with long fur? Rough Collie Favorite dog with short/no fur? Doberman Favorite drooly breed? Neapolitian Mastiff Favorite "low allergy" breed? Standard Poodle Favorite breed many people may not be familiar with? Hovawart Favorite breed the BYBs have become fond of? APBT

There are so many to choose from, but one of my favourites is Groucho Marx to a rather snotty author - "From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter - someday I intend reading it'

Another, was from former US President Calvin Coolidge. At a dinner party, one young temptress remarked to him 'Mr President, I have a bet with my friend I can make you say at least 3 words all evening' To which Coolidge replied 'You lose' and said nothing for the rest of the night. Brilliant.

"War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Strength" 1984 by George Orwell. Paradoxically its some how right. If your at war with a country then the attacking country is united, if you have to many choices you cannot decide whereas if someone didnt give you a choice you should be happy as you dont know any difference and it saves time umming and arring over such trivia and if youre ignorant then you think you are strong as youre ignorant.

-take a long walk off a short cliff

-when the tough get going, the going get tough

-every cloud has a silver lining

-behind the clouds the sun shines

-greatness inspires envy, envy engnders spite and spite spawns lies( jk rowling from HP and the half blood prince)

-a pen is mightier than a sword

-when life gives you lemons make lemonade

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"You can put a cat in the oven but it doesn't make it a biscuit."

I don't know why but I personally like this one-liner. It makes me smile. It's from the 1992 film "White Men Can't Jump" (See below link). However I'm sure I first noticed it on an episode of "The Simpsons" though, but I can't find any reference to it.

From a man using the lavatory like a woman -

Better a sit down p*ss than a stand-up s*it!

Better to have loved and lost than to have lived with the psycho for the rest of your life

Lynn18050

There has only been one perfect person on the face of the earth and that was Crist himself and he hasn't been here for two thousand years.

mistakes...thats why they put erasers on pencils.

Encouragement- If He brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Advice- If you make a habit of 'drowning your sorrows' (with alcohol), remember they will one day learn to swim!

My 18 yr old student says 'make love not war- condoms are cheaper.'

"Snakes have no arms, that's why they don't wear vests." - Steven Wright

Their are three errors in this sentance.

"When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep, not screaming like all the passengers in his car." - Anonymous

I've posted a link with a bunch of one-liners below.