Hubby is ready to call it quits with his daughter?

This behavior is typical of many teenage girls. If it were my child, I would stop trying to socialize with her with the exception that she participate in family meals. She doesn't need to share the conversation, but she should have to share the table.

Teenagers think it is the geekiest thing in the world to have to appear in public with their family. It embarrasses them to death and they are afraid a classmate might see them.

If she is assigned chores and doesn't do them, then her privileges should be revoked.

She chose to live with you. Now help her understand she is part of the family and needs to do her share but allow her some privacy.

Don't go to a counselor...it will only make her more distant. I know that is many peoples answer to the problem, but kids who are forced to go to counseling and dont want help only rebel more. I was just the same way. I distanced myself more because I didn't want help. I think you both need to snatch her away for the weekend (whether she likes it or not) and go camping or get a hotel and go skiing if it snows where you are. Get a place that is small enough that she can't avoid y'all. When you get there write her a letter explaining how you feel...and give it to her. Tell her to write you back and answer each question. Teenagers can communicate better this way. Treat her like a friend for the time being. Spend the weekend hanging out and doing "friend" things. Talk to her about how you were when you were her age. No matter what, teenagers are always fascinated about how their parents (or stepparents) were when they are younger. After you have some time bonding, slowly transition into the friend/parent phase.

I hope this helps maybe a little. I know when I was that age I was miserable because my mom couldn't communicate. If we had a weekend off, away from my escape (my friends), no cell phone (i didnt have one then anyway), and if she wrote me a letter...things might have been better.

Good Luck!

Remember: no counseling! those go to a counselor and work their issues out are people who WANTED to go in the first place. Don't drag her there.

4 get it unless ur prepared to pay the price.something has gone wrong and u really need somebody elses help to see whats what i2n the plot.ur 2 close.sending this issue away is yellow and sucks. if the counseling didnt reap results then u need to press in with gentle persuasion.be tough too.please understand that what ever u think might be wrong may be the case.my oppinion is abuse as she is in denial.escape from reality normally has such behavior although not always.u go and tell a helper whats up and get advice.take action and do not leave this to become something else.all the best

I would try a different therapist if she will go, some just don't seem to be effective counselors. I had some counseling many years ago and didn't click w the first one but decided not to give up and wound up getting a wonderful therapist who helped me immensely.

I had similar problems w my oldest son when he was 15. We tried a family therapist w him but he did not cooperate at all so she said it was serving no purpose. He had decided he didn't want to be part of the family so whenever we rented a movie or had dinner I asked him to leave the room since we were a family and he didn't want to be a part of it. He caved after 4 days, but it was sooooo hard for me. I told him I'm sorry but it hurts us to sit here w someone who doesn't want to be part of a family who loves him so please excuse yourself. So he had to eat in his room alone. Can't promise it would work for you but it worked for us.

there's a pragmatic place for premarital, and marital counseling. in case you (the two) are UNWILLING to % out the topics on your marriage and make the mandatory changes, then particular, it's time to call it quits. ok, so which you the two had failed at your first (a minimum of, first) relationships. You the two have childrens from earlier relationships. How long develop into your courtship of one yet another ahead of THIS marriage? Or develop into it based fullyyt on the two considered one of you (thinking yourselves 'sexually nicely matched'? Did you ever communicate any of those kinds of themes earlier? Roles? familiar jobs? If, although, you the two are keen to confess you have problems on your marriage, and are keen TO dedicate to do what's mandatory to save or rescue this failing relationship, then there remains wish. yet you will probable desire 'exterior help', a counselor, somebody who will hear to the two factors of your thoughts, and objectively help you the two to alter.

hard situation there it won't be fixed over night no matter what. A good start would be asking her to sit down and tell you and her dad what's going on. If you think she won't sit down let her write her issues out you write yours out share them with eachother see if it leads to solving anything. I would advoid suggesting she move out no matter her age she should never feel her dad turned his back on her she may have issues going on where she needs him now more then ever GET TO THE BOTTOM of it together.

They need to go to counseling and she needs help and your husband needs to help her and be there for her through this hard and rough time in her life... He needs to be a dad and not call it quits and give up on her. She sounds like a very troubled girl! I wonder if something happened to her when she was at her moms house....

I am no shrink but negative attention is still attention, tell her that she either straightens up or pout in her room.

But you don't want to send her back to her mother's because you guys have the stable home she needs.

Let her be she's 17. If she doesn't do her chores though she shouldn't be able to go to her friends until they are done.

Sounds as if she spends most of her time out of the way, which is normal for that age these days. I think maybe you are making a mountain out of nothing.