how do you get your husband....?

If he wasn't lazy before he got laid off then he could be depressed. If he's always been lazy then just tell him you're tired of working 2 full time jobs, one away from home & one at home, and tell him you don't need him anymore.

If he's out of work now he may be depressed but that's not an excuse for him to be lazy around the house. At the moment you are working in and out of the home while he sits around. You have to tell him that you are not able to keep this up as it's difficult enough when you are both working to get things done. Explain that if he does what needs to be done around the house during the day that you will have more time for him when you get home and that the opposite is also true. Give him an incentive to get off his *** and do something to help and don't be afraid to withold favours is he isn't co-opperating!! Hit him where it hurts i.e. in his trousers!!!!

asking him to just "help out" is vague and ambiguous. make a list of things that are done around the house. cleaning the bathroom, running the vacuum, laundry, cooking, cleaning the kitchen, etc. i don't know how old your kids are, but if they are old enough to help have them attend a family meeting that includes your husband. ask each person what they think they would be able to do to help out. ask each person what they think would be their least favorite chore. my least fav is doing laundry, so my kids (i am now a single mom) help a ton with this!!!! if everyone hates cleaning the kitchen, then divide it up so that it isn't just one persons responsibility. also, if everyone picks their own chores, then they might be more likely to get the work done. oh, and my big problem was that my kids nor my husband when we were married did things they way i did them. you can guide them a small bit, but let them figure out how to do the job on their own. if you constantly correct them and try to show them the way you do it, they are might want to just give up and let you do it on your own. maybe even give them a time limit that their are responsible for the chores that they signed up on. make it only for a week or two weeks. then if there are chores that someone really hates, have them swap it for another chore. your husband is probably starting these fights when the talk of helping out comes up because he knows that he is wrong. the fights probably end up being about something other than house cleaning - right? keeping a house picked up and cleaned is a matter of habit, just got to help your husband get these "habits." good luck to you!!!

I'm in the same boat. I have 2 kids and I work full-time. My hubby goes hunting all day. After work, I'm rushing around to get my kids fed (and usually cleaning the dishes from the night before) while he sits down with his feet up, watching TV. I get tired of it too but in small ways, he helps me in the morning getting our kids ready for school, starts my vehicle and brushes off any snow, shovels the driveway - stuff like that. Some mornings he prepares us breakfast (probably 2 days out of the week). I just told him one day that if he expects some action once we hit the sheets, I need help because I get bushed out from doing it all! It works 50% of the time....but any little bit helps! (p.s. don't forget the thank him or compliment him on his housework/cooking.....I do and he seems to get a lift from it.).

Well, to be honest, I have had that situation happen to me with my boyfriend. He was laid off and I worked. No kids though. I would come home and have to cook and clean and wash clothes. He would be watching tv or playing on the computer.

The only thing I would do, is cook, clean, and wash clothes for me, and not say one word to him about anything. I would basically give him the silent treatment. When he asked me what was wrong, I would give him "The Look". I don't have the energy or the time to fight with him about anything. So, I do for myself and if he needs or wants anything, he can do it for himself until he can learn to help out.

Sounds like he has a low self esteem problem. It will do him so much good to help out. it will give him a feeling of being useful and needed, keep his mind off of things. To do a good job at what ever it is, even if it is house cleaning. You have to let him know this, Show him this answer.

He'll get the point,if not he may need some medication to help him through his depression.

Best wishes!

Guys are clueless. You need to tell him that you need his help. If you cook, he cleans up the mess, vice versa. When it comes to the house, leave simple "honey to do lists". I don't ask my husband to clean the whole bathroom, I'll ask him to clean the toilets. I'll ask him to do a load of towels, or a load of whites. Keep it simple. Then make sure you praise him when he does it. Kind of like you would do for a child.

But for your kids sake, it's important that they see you you and your hubbie share in the responsibilty. It teaches them team work, and that women shouldn't shoulder all the responsibility. It's amazing what kids pick up from their parents and use what they learned through out their lives.

i am aguy and thats a bunch of bull****. If I were you I'd stop cooking for him. Thereis nothing wrong with a guy helping out. I have argued with my mate over washing dishes. If she cooks then I do the dishes. Tell him either he cleans up after himself or you go on strike, also I would cut him off if you know what I mean. You didnt mention the age of your children but are they old enough to clean after themselves. I'm not the neatest guy in the world but I do pick up after myself. as a teenager I saw what this kind of thing did to my parents and I vowed if I ever found a woman who would cook for me, and do my laundry and so forth that I was going to do the right thing and help. Nobody has to slave over this guy and ya know what? you women really do appreciate if a guy at least makes the effort. some of us men truly appreciate the things you do for us beyond the bedroom. I have been with my lady for 15 years now. I am sorry to say that your man does not appreciate you. I wish i could give better advice on this

i am in the same boat right now with my fiance he works all day and so do i yet i have to do everything. so heres what i did i sat him down and explained to him calmly and rationally that a little help is appreciated. when that didnt work i stopped cleaning up after him, yep thats right he wouldnt put the laundry in the hamper i left it where it lied. he didnt rinse his dishes i would tidy around his dishes. i have been doing this for a week now and last night he got the hint when he went to change into sweats and found he had no sweats. this morning he was doing dishes. i think he got the hint

Sit him down and tell him its do this or get out. Marrige is supposed to be 50/50 and if you are the only one working then losing him would cause what kind of hardship? Tell him either he needs to pull housework duty or get a new job. Mcdonalds is always hiring. There is no excuse for laziness in a grown adult. I mean how much worse do you need it to get?