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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

Abusive Mother-in-Law and Sister-in Laws?

My mother separted from her husband immediately following my wedding (within a couple of months ago) and moved in with us (my husband and I). My father-in law has a very bad reputation among people that we know (he allegedly had an affair with a younger woman) and basically is very uncivilized. My mother-in law went into depression and took it out on me. She could not stand to see me get close to her son. She sarcastically makes fun of me (including in front of others) and tries to look better than me and compares herself to me (physically and intelligence wise) to my husband. She wears the same style clothes as me (colors, fabric; kinda weird don't you think considering i'm more than 40 years younger than her). Mind you, I have not said anything rude to my mother-law. Also, my sister-law (one of two) also recently separted from her husband and came over to my place to visit. She basically acted like a control freak and a tramp (trying to be sexy around her brother..there is more ....

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Sounds to me that the family needs some help. Your mother-in-law is very insecure in her women hood and her appeal to men since her husband likes younger women. She needs to get a grip on her inner self and seek some help. Have you spoke to your husband about the trauma this is causing you? His mother is not doing herself any favors by trying to com peat with you. She really is off base and truly get her some help before she has ruined your relationship. Maybe mother and daughter should move in together and let you and your husband have you home back. I wish you luck and be firm in the help area.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    The best way in these situations is not to feed the demon that seems to be powering this person. Just try to focus on ther good side, everyone has a good side and whatever you do, keep confrontation to a minimun, don't fight back just remove yourself from the situation as much as you can but when you are in it, let it slide do they utter abuse? Good let them listen to their own words, it will deflate them. good luck. RE: Problems with my Mother in law and sister in law. Please...need advice.? Long story short. I have been with my husband since we were 15 years old. We are both now 30. We dated for 9 years and got married a year after being engaged. We just had our first child (a little girl) about 3 months ago. My Mother in Law and Sister in Law have always hated me for no reason. (truly) My husband has 3 other brothers an they do not talk to his mother or sister due to the trouble they have caused in their relationships. My husband and I have been to therapy together. We have a great relationship other than the fact that his mother and sister keep trying to break us up. Till this day! It has been 14 years. My question is...I don't act like this. Oh and btw this all started because since we have had the baby they have lost control of our lives. Meaning...that we are busy with the baby yet we still have them over at LEAST once a week. What do I do? Please give me advice. I am really torn over all this and have no where to turn. Thank you so much.

  • 1 decade ago

    Your husband needs to talk with his mother. He should tell her that he loves her but, right now he needs to start his marriage with his wife. He should not allow his mother to talk to you in any way other than respectfully. This is his mother---his problem. If your husband is unwilling to confront his mother then your marriage is in serious trouble. His mother obviously has other children and should never have moved in with her newly married son. That's just not right. Your husband should tell her she needs to move out to either her own place or with one of his siblings. Also, don't allow people to take control in your house. If your husband won't deal with his family then tell him you'll be forced to do it. He'll probably step up and be a man and take care of the situation. If not, then be strong, assertive, but don't yell or scream. If your sister-in-law starts acting inappropriately, then tell her "I'm sorry, I'm not comfortable with this, I think it's time for you to go" and show her the door. Get your mother-in-law out of the house and tell your husband you want to see a marriage counselor. Good Luck!

  • 1 decade ago

    i don't know what your question is. the only thing i can give you advice on is the following. kick out everyone that is living with you and your husband. it's not fair for the 2 of you to have to deal with other peoples baggage. you are newly weds.

    also, it seems as though your mother in-law is competing with you for his love. this is wrong also because it's a different type of love he has for each of you, and it's not fair to him that she is sort of questioning his judgment in whom he loves. so you need to sit down and speak with him in regards to these matters or your marriage will be over before it's even started. let him talk to his family about this not you or it will cause even more friction between his family and you. good luck.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That family is f@cked up. The mother in law would have to go as soon as she started trouble at my home. Put your foot down to your husband or be prepared to separate. Sorry this is happening to you, but it will continue until you do something!

  • 1 decade ago

    You married into the freak show now you have to live with your choice.

    If his mother is trying to look like you etc. then she obviously feels inferior to you. thats sad but not your problem. your father inlaw is out whoring around town. disgusting but again not your problem. your sister-in-law is a tramp with the hots for her brother disturbing but not impossible to deal with. take the whole group of them backwoods hillbilly halfwits and throw them the hell out. and if your husband has a problem with that throw him to the curb too.

  • Amy S
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Behave with tact and graciousness... In the end, no matter what happens, that's your best bet.. knowing you didn't allow yourself to be dragged down into their "Jerry Springer" type behavior..

  • 1 decade ago

    set some ground rules or get them all out of your house

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