Another poetry attempt .. any honest opinions ?

Question

Stuck

Here I am stuck in this small town
Where there is very little work to be found
I’ll probably be here for the rest of my time
Because of a past horrendous crime
It started with a social drink or two
But then it took off and just grew and grew
I thought I could handle it by myself
Till I took the life of someone else
I was arrested and charged by the local fuzz
And groups like MADD & SADD were all a buzz
They wanted to see me pay dearly for my crime
So the courts gave me the maximum time
So while in prison I sought some aid
And thanks to therapy I’m still sober today

Written by me an 18yr recovering alcoholic

Hmg♥Brd · Accepted Answer

Whoah, that is just "Beautifully Well Written!!" I think you should send it too "Poetry.com", and get it entered into their contest's!! You could win thousands for that poem!!! I have mine in a poetry book called: "Timeless Voices" and this was through poetry.com.......I am not a member, however,  it costs too much money to become a member, but there's alot of benefits to be one!!! You can meet famous poet's, and there's newsletters, about other famous poet's, and prizes, and lots of good things about this site!!! And they always send you mail and keep you posted regardless, if your a member or not, so, give it a try!! Good luck to you!!! I could definately see your poetry going places!!! And right along with you!!Haha Smile!!!

johnslat · Answer

Hey, good for you. I've been recovering for only six years now.
I think that rather than writing strictly poetry, you should focus on song lyrics. What you have here could, with the right music, be a very good C&W song.

Anonymous · Answer

Who's stuck???  Nice Poem/Story

18 yrs of ladder climbing 

our higher power will carry the load,
We just keep doing first thing first , 
one rung at a time.
  
Walking the talk or climbing the ladder is the steps we take, blind faith is the way,
the journey is the story. 
we are nolonger stuck.

MR JB= 25 yrs
&
Billee B

sonbola · Answer

That's a great attempt. I have always believed that writing is a form of sheer salvation. Anyway, I would advise you to make your style in writing ( which is obviously modern) more deep and perhaps old. For it is hundreds of years before that poetry was a man of glory.

? · Answer

i could desire to assert on your age the poem is powerful....yet i could additionally say that in case you will write loose verse poems without rhythm or rhyme you have no write to criticize others for writing poems in the comparable way. you may proceed to jot down and strengthen your form.With a splash extra time you may desire to strengthen right into a large author:)

Anonymous · Answer

It's good BUT leave out some of the "I'"s, buts and so's, to make it seem shorter and go better together. Great work

hottie3369 · Answer

I think you are a pathetic person going onto the internet trying to make people fell bad for you.

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Another poetry attempt .. any honest opinions ?

7 Answers