Head banging temper tantrums, any suggestions to help put it to a stop?

My son did this for months. It was awful! He finally stopped when he banged his head on the floor at the hospital. It really hurt and he never did it again. I don't really know what to tell you because it is nearly impossible to stop!

Hi, My 2 yo also did the same thing with tantrums, especially on the cot at night, she ended up with bruises spotting her forehead looking like a damaged child!! I also was worried about this behaviour, and felt it wasn't right, some told me it was just a tantrum but I was concerned that she was hurting herself. I took her to see a cranio-sacral type physiotherapist/osteopath type specialist (a specialist in manuology - spelling ?? -) and he said she was doing the head banging in frustration because she had tight bands across her head, and this was the only way she knew how to try and release the tension, by head banging. I was extremely sceptical, not really believing what he was saying. He 'worked' on her head with pressure points, and said that he could feel a release in her muscle tension. I thought, yep ok, whatever, and didn't think much more about it. Long story short, she did the head banging thing 2 more times that day, and in the last 6 months has only done it ONCE since!!!! Call it what you will, but I consider her treated, don't know how, don't understand it, but I have no other explanation for the lack of head banging.

PS the tantrums continue, as per normal 2 yo's, but with no head banging, and thus no bruises. Yay! Hope this helps, gives more food for thought. Problems are not always emotional or behavioural. Good luck.

Hi I'm a nursery Nurse in Scotland and have been working with pre school children for eight years. I work with two year olds and have seen many two year olds having head banging tantrums. Sometimes tantrums are for attention yes even if it is negitive.

The first thing to do is to try and work out what is causing the tantrums if your child isn't talking it could be linked to frustration from being unable to communicate. As your child develops language the tantrums should ease. Two year olds are still at that stage where they think the world rotates around them lol. Tantrums is a natural stage where children try to be in control and push the boundries. An important thing is to be consistent with your rules and that everyone involved in his care respects your rules. For example you might not let your child jump on furniture and another carer will the child picks up on this and plays you off each other. Yes two year olds can be manipulative don't worry it's a normal stage!!!!

Ok so what do you do when the head banging starts well first thing remove any dangers eg anything that your child might hurt themselves on. You might want to set up a padded area with cushions or pillows where you place your child when they tantrum. Try not to respond other than moving them into the soft area and removing dangers and ignore. Yes I know tantrums are very very hard to ignore especially if head banging is involved. The important thing is to remain calm and this stage should pass eventually. If you are still worried chat to your health visiter or doctor for further advice but I'm sure you will be ok.

You might want to try and give him extra attention and extra fuss for doing good things and raise yur voice so you sound excited or pleased. eg that picture is fantastic good job on tiding up you have been really good going to the shops etc. Good luck

Is he not talking full sentences or not talking at all?

Maybe it could be frustration if there is a communication barrier. However, temper tantrums should not be acceptable behavior. Find in outlet for your 2 year old. Maybe an inflatable punching bag or something to that effect. The hard part of this situation is that you do not want him to hurt himself but you also need not to encourage the behavior as well.

Get to eye level with your child, you can give him the option of continuing the tantrum in his room by himself or he can straighten up, calm down, and be with everyone else.

Sometime kids do this for attention and will continuing doing it even if they receive negative feedback.

Give him his options, allow him to decide and have him deal with his actions appropriately.

He's got you right where he wants you. I know it's hard but you have to walk away and ignore it. When he starts throwing his tantrum, bend down to his level, take hold of his arms( not to tightly) and tell him in a calm voice to stop. If he doesn't stop, pick him up and put him in a safe place (i.e his cot) and walk away. Stand outside the door if you must but stay out of sight for 5 mins. After 5 mins go in and tell him he can come out if he calms down, you may have to repeat this a few times until he gets the idea.

WHAT EVER YOU DO, DO NOT GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTED. If you give in it makes the problem worse, he thinks to himself "all I have to do is keep banging my head a while and I'll get the toy/lolly" or what ever it was that started the tantrum. You have to stick to your word and so does every adult who cares for him. He needs to learn if he bangs his head he gets put in his cot EVERY TIME.

Good luck

1) He's not able to hurt himself. Also see "refusal to eat brocoli" and "self starvation".

1a) If he appears to knock himself out, he's just fallen asleep from exhaustion.

2) Stop giving him what he wants.

2a) Unless what he wants is a nap.

3) If he's making a scene in public, please, for the sake of the rest of us, take him home ASAP.

3a) Unless he wants to go home. The important thing is to take him somewhere else.

Speak to him in a calm voice during his tantrum. Tell him that he will not get his way. He may not talk, but he can understand you. It's possible he isn't talking because he can get what he wants just by smacking his head on stuff. If so, he'll start communicating with words once that stops working.

Frustration and self-inflicted harm are common among much older severely autistic children. No offense, but your kid is just on his way to becoming a brat. Nip it in the bud now.

Hello. It sounds like he's having trouble dealing with the feeling of disappointment and is also having difficulty communicating his wants and needs.

First, I would recommend an evaluation by early intervention services. These are free and provided in nearly every state. Call your school district or ask your child's doctor about early intervention services. If he is not talking at age 2, he will qualify for speech services. These services can be very helpful. Usually they do a screening first to see what areas need to be assessed (speech and language, social/emotional, cognitive, etc). Then, assessments are done in those areas that show a delay. Those assessment scores are used to qualify the child for services and an IFSP (individualized family service plan) is written.

Second, ignoring the behavior is great if he is doing it for attention. If the function of the behavior is to obtain an object or something, then he is not doing it for attention. I would encourage you to try to label his feeling (disappointment, frustration, whatever) and 'join' with him in the feeling. My guess is that he can understand more than he can say, so you could say things like 'It's so hard to not get what you want, you're feeling really disappointed." Kind of defining the feeling and identifying the feeling for him. Research shows that children cannot regulate or control their emotions until they are able to label or identify them. By identifying his feeling for him, you can help him with that. At the same time, try to model deep breathing and calm. Try to get him to start taking some breaths...to slow down and calm. He needs to regulate himself and you can be a model with this as well. Try to support him and guide him through it.

Of course, IF you feel like he is doing this to get your attention, then ignoring him would be appropriate. But it's always important regardless to try to label the feeling for them. Good luck!

as a parent - i'm going to tell you the thing you DON'T want to hear.

he's doing it because it's your fault - KEEP READING!

your attitude, voice, reaction - something - changes when he does this. That reaction is what he's looking for. That anger, rage, etc.. are his way of saying "look at me" "do something" "i can't figure out what i want"

often the best thing to do is to remove him from the situation while devoid of emotion, and reaction.

take what he has away without saying anything, pick him up (not hugging) and move him to a quiet place and set him down and walk away - or turn your back.

this will help you - help him unlearn that behavior

again, it's all got to be cool, calm, collected, and done unapprovingly - but without emotion

Good Luck!

my son did the same thing at that age. i would hold him as close to me as i could,so he wouldn't hurt himself, until he stopped. This works ,my kid used to crack his head on everything even the concrete/cement/brick wall,you name it. I was so worried i went to the doctors. This is what he told me to do.If it didn't work they said they would make him a spacial helmet so he didn't have brain damaged later on in life. it worked"woo-hoo", to the doc. Bubby is 17 years old now, Hmm maybe it didn't work? just kidding ,he made it to 17. Sometimes i would sit and just rock with him for a long time in-till he would come down . not in a rocking chair just your body.you have to hold him titer so he cant move. each time will get a little Essie . At first i needed help to hold him because he was so strong.it took 2 ppl. It really worked

I have to agree with the advice to ignore it. My youngest is 8. SHe did this a few times when she was two and I gently picked her up, explaining 'we don't act like this' and informed her she was welcome to come out when she was done. I don't think she tried ot more than a couple other times.

SHe has always lived with me but it lasted longer when she was at her mom's because she got a different reaction out of mom. She discovered she could get what she wanted withthat behavior at mom's but had to find other methods at home at dad's. (i think she discovered asking dad nicely would get her anything. She has it down to a science now)