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Jessie
Lv 5
Jessie asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 1 decade ago

How to graciously flake out last minute?

Here is the deal:

I agreed to help a student photographer with his semester film as an extra.

He did not get with me until TODAY for the exact time and place needed for TODAYs shoot.

Also, suddently, he "needs" me all day Saturday and Sunday.

I did not anticipate spending so much time on this project, and I have a feeling that I am being used or that he has some weird crush or something going on.

I need to call him by 1:30 (in 1 hour).

How should I go about dealing with this situation (I no longer want to do it, and not like I am getting paid or trust that I will even get a copy of the end result at this point)?

11 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Be up front with him and be honest. If it were you would you want someone to flake out on you? Especially if it was someone you may like or someone you want to work with in the future? Do you ever consider other people's feelings or think about how it would make you feel if someone did that to you?

    If you feel that you are being manipulated into doing this with him then you need to take the responsibly yourself to put your foot down with him. If you allow people to manipulate you then they will.

    If you don't then you would have said listen I don't have a lot of time to spend so pick one day and let's get this finished. You are doing this person the favor so the ball should have been in your court not just his.

    Copping out on someone won't resolve the problem. If you are telling a group of strangers out here your honest feelings why can't you do the same with this person? Think about that one for a while.

    No, I am not going to tell you what you want to hear mainly because that too would be a cop out or as you would put it a flake out now wouldn't it?

  • 1 decade ago

    I am sorry to say that I don't think there is a gracious way to flake out this close to the time. Why not trying going today and letting him know that you feel all day Saturday and Sunday is excessive?

  • LM
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    First of all let me just say the bottom line is YOU AGREED. ; )~ The rest of everything you said here were all the reasons you wanted to make it "okay" that you FLAKED like you said to begin with. ;))

    Okay well there is no real gracious way to get out of this, other than LIE!

    And well i know this is late now, but well you can do the ol' classic phone call " :: cough cough:: oh i am terribly sorry :: cough cough:: i am miserably sick and just would be no good to you. I would have called earlier but i just now woke up..." The rest is your "script" of course and you can let me know how it "read".

  • 1 decade ago

    Just tell him you have a last minute test that you have to study for and you can not afford to miss it. Do not meet him after that. If he asks your schedule is full and you can no longer work on this project for him, but you appreciate the chance he gave you.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You agreed to help him so I think the nice thing to do is help him. Go today and tell him to get as much done today as possible because you can't be there during the weekend. Tell him you didn't realize he'd need you Saturday and Sunday so you're not available and you made other plans but that you'll be there today.

  • 1 decade ago

    Tell him your a busy person and the timing is really bad. Tell him you don't have 2 days to spend on a project with him. Tell him you can give him X amt of time and thats it, take it or leave it.

  • 1 decade ago

    Given the extremely short notice, he can hardly hold it against you if you claim a prior commitment for today and this weekend. Tell him that and make yourself scarce for the weekend.

  • 1 decade ago

    Tell him you are booked and that you need to have more time notice than this next time. Dont feel guilty. He wouldnt have expected you to cease all your engagements just waiting for this day.

  • 1 decade ago

    tell him you can help him for "x" amount of time today, but your schedule is kinda tight after that, and you're booked totally for the weekend ... asnd does he still want you to help?

    and when he calls after that, just be honest and say that you're not able to help again because of time constraints, but you do wish him the very best

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    "I'm very sorry, but I can't rearrange my schedule at the last minute. Perhaps if you had given me more notice, we could have worked something out. I wish you the best of luck with your project."

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