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I was talking a friend and she said she was fat, I said "yeah, I'm fat too" and she got really mad at me.  I didn't say she was fat I simply said that I was fat too.  I really like her and I hope I didn't screw up.  I don't know why she got so mad, she said she felt insulted, but, I didn't say "hey you're a fatty." She said that if a woman says she's fat you should never agree with her.  I thought I was being honest and admitting that I would like to lose weight too.  Did I screw up bad?  Do you think she doesn't like me now?  I really like her and I would hate for something like this to destroy the relationship we are developing.  What should I do to bounce back?  We have a great time chatting on line, talking on the phone, and hanging out.  I need advice on damage control, thanks.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I'd say it was a mistake, but she won't hate you for it.  It's a simple one, but note it for next time:

"yeah, i'm fat TOO."  The too means also, or me as well as you in this case.  Inadvertantly, you said "You're fat."

I'd say be a bit more careful with your speech, but it shouldn't really hurt your relationship...

G'luck!

~Abab

Capri8 · Answer

Well, first of all you should apologize.  Your right never imply, no matter how it came out, that a woman is fat.  The answer is change the subject, quickly!  Most important when a woman ask you this next time and your getting ready to answer DO NOT stare down on her and then give her the answer----because that indicates that you are checking her body to see if she's fat. This might take a lot of practice for some guys. Just remember though women are more sensitive than men.  So just apologize, and if she can't accept it, keep apologizing and explain what you explain about not really meaning what you said. If she wanted to stay friends with you, and if she cares about you, she will forgive you, hopefully. Good Luck.

P.s.  I just think she likes you as more than a friend, maybe that's why hearing the response come from you hurt her.

caroline · Answer

I think she expected you to say "your not fat" and tell her how she was beautiful. Girls can be insecure sometimes and they don't always say things openly and only give hints that they expect you to pick up on. Guys being a lot more open don't often pick up on the subtle things girls do. This is a generalization though.
I don't think you did anything wrong, but maybe you should try to make her feel better. You seem to like her so maybe take the plunge and ask her out.

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