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i found this funny?
The art of storytelling is not dead...
Here's a prime example of "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus"...offered by an English professor from the University of Colorado for an actual class assignment:
The professor told his class one day: "Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right or left.
As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that paragraph and send another copy to me.
The partner will read the first paragraph, and then add another paragraph to the story and send it back, also sending another copy to me.
The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on,back-and-forth.
Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking outside of the e- mails, and anything you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached."
The following was actually turned in by two of his English students:
Rebecca and Gary.
THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca)
At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home,now reminded her too much of Earl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Earl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.
(Second paragraph by Gary )
Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Earl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now
in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the
neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had
spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said, into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far." But before he could sign off, a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.
(Rebecca)
He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one
last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever
had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel", Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her."Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.
(Gary)
Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.Thousands of
miles above the city, the Anudrian mothership launched the first of its
lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the
Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through the Congress had left Earth
a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to
destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty,
the Anudrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to
pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie.
(Rebecca)
This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate adolescent.
(Gary)
Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose
attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh,shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F--KING TEA??? Oh
no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many
Danielle Steele novels!"
(Rebecca)
As*h@le.
(Gary)
B*tch!
(Rebecca)
F**K YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!
(Gary)
In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
(TEACHER)
A+ - I really liked this one!
27 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade ago
WOW!!! That was Superb! I wonder if something like that will work here on YA???
I would like to request all my friends at YA to join me in Wishing all our American friends a Very Enjoyable, Safe & Happy Independence Day on July 4th! May there be no untoward incidents!
Hey Americans! Our prayers are with you!!!
~
- salimdistLv 41 decade ago
Wow thanks for sharing what a funny joke. It was so funny how laurie's peaceful story was intertwined with Gary's diabolical story of assault and weaponry. I really liked Gary's version the best because of it's creativity instead of tea.
- 1 decade ago
Very clever assignment - really proves his point....and is so funny too! I'd love to see what some of the other students came up with. I give it this one an A++!!
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- 1 decade ago
This is one of the funniest things I have ever read!! I have read it 3 times today and I cant stop laughing!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
1.) very lengthy
2.) very funny at the end
3.) makes u wonder what would have happened if the professer had told them that they could have talked about the story elsewhere.... might not have given an A+ maybe...
- justmeLv 41 decade ago
Priceless!! LMAO!!
You get a star, an A+ and a cup of tea for posting this! lol
- Anonymous5 years ago
I think "bicorn" aka "****** hat curve" is a bit peculiar. No explanation necessary. The "dog bone shape" (an hourglass with rounded ends) comes in a close second for me.
- 1 decade ago
i loved this one!soo funny just shows how diffrent people can be!i think gary is from mars and rebecca is from venus!