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I've been very hesitant to ask this question....?

This is a long story but to sum it up could you ever date or be with someone who killed someone you loved? I dated this guy for about 4 years. He wouldnt marry me. But he was the love of my life. But we broke up a couple times (never over cheating or anything) anyway after we got back together the last time I met someone else. Charming and sweet..all around great guy and decided (like an idiot) to be with the new guy. So I told my boyfriend and he was devistated. Not the reaction I thought I'd get at all. But anyway then my bf proposed to me, which I thought was a last grasp at holding on to me. I said no and then a few days later he came into where I worked and shot the new guy several times and killed him. =( Since then my bf has found God and is a totally new man. He's the man I wanted him to be so long ago. He used to be totally unemotional and now hes prince charming. I love him but I hate what he did. We talk every day and things are good.

Update:

But to sum it all up I wondered if it could truly work. And what would you do if you were in my shoes? There hasnt been a trial yet and I'm not considering the time factor yet. It all emotions at this point.

Update 2:

Yes, this is a true story.

Update 3:

Ok my bf is in jail still. The trial is in about a month. I am the prosecutions primary witness cos he did it right in front of me. I feel terrible but its been 8 months so I don't cry like I used to. But just writing this has me watery eyed. He found God about a month after being in jail and yes I know he truly has because hes decided to plead guilty cos he says he couldnt face God with a clear conscience if he pleaded any other way. Any yes, he will probably go to jail for a very long time. And to tell you all the truth if I were in your shoes Id be saying "Dump him" too. But your heart isnt in the same place as mine. ANd I've thought about him hurting me and I truly don't believe that he would or could. He trulty is a Christian now. And this whole thing is what brought both of us back to God.

13 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    oh my gosh i am so sorry. I personally dont know how your feeling right now. but did your bf go to jail for shooting the other guy?did he get a consiquence? and how long did he take to find god.i would have to know inside that he was really sorry not just saying it.and if you kill someone dont you go to jail for life? if you could add some additional details i could help you with the rest but i dont know that mutch about it.but i think i would have to know, trust your instink (or however u spell it) think about it if he did it once he will probly do it agian, mayby to you . so plz add additional details/

    also think about that other mans family.his mother and dad if they are alive im sure they are devistated how could you get together with the man who hurt you,that other guy.the guys friends and family? it hurts and i know how it feels to be hurt emotionally.so you should probly remain good friends with this guy and not tell him who you are datung becasue if he gets mad agian he could hurt you and possibly kill you and the other guy. so try visting him in jail when he goes .im so srry though.pray to god and ask for help.

    god bless you!!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I'm sorry to say but I don't think that you should give him another chance. I don't believe people change and he was obviously jealous of your relationship with the new guy or he wouldn't of killed him. I would be afraid that one day his jealousy would make him do something bad to me. You don't seem very upset over the fact that he killed your new boyfriend but then again it's probably the computer hiding your emotions. Your bf may say he's found God but couldn't that be because he's afraid of getting sentenced to death or life in prison. Also have you taken in to consideration that he will be in prison for a very long time and do you really want to have a relationship with someone who is going to be behind bars for most of his life.

  • 5 years ago

    I asked a sort of private question some hours in the past and considered one of my contacts gave me an wonderful answer. i think of i'm way too open for my very own stable so i do no longer strategies if my contacts understand issues approximately me that are insanely very own or large embarrassing. My contacts are all stable human beings and that they are going to settle for me for me. some might sense awkward upon seeing a number of my very own questions, yet I doubt they're going to choose me too harshly.

  • 1 decade ago

    Hasnt been a trial yet! well am not going to judge him but think about the time he is going to be in jail. DO you deserve to cry for 2 mans? Dont you deserve a better life with someone really close to you. Just think about it. Its nice from you to bring him support but he is a crimilar, wheter you like it or not imagine if you have a baby with him and you cant be with him 100% of time... is he going to kill your baby because he wants you and noone else in the middle. Good luck!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If what you are saying this, how you can possibly be with someone who has such a jealous rage to kill a human being. You're in trouble if this is the case but hey it's your life. A person can change of course, but you have to think of the situation of why it happened. "HE KILLED OUT OF JEALOUSY AND RAGE". What makes you think that ain't going to happen to you?

  • JoJoBa
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Your boyfriend acted out of jealous rage and only God knows if he is forgiven. Being he had no remorse at the time and now has turned his life around that is good. God promises to forgive us our sin when we turn to him and if you love him dearly then follow your heart. However pray about it carefully first.

  • Is this serious? If so you'd be an idiot to be with someone that that mentality. Obviously the decision making skills are poor on his end and to actually deal with that would be DUMB. I can't even believe this story though...it's mind boggling.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    thats a little intense. i would say no, a man who kills cannot truely love, there's something wrong. if you say he's found God then pray to God and ask him to give you guidance. He will tell you if this guy should be given a second chance. God says dont judge or you'll be judged so Im not totally sure. Pray about it.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Hon, your bf will be convicted of murder and will spend a long time in prison. Sorry, but the emotional toll of him spending years in prison will be too much for you. Best put a stop to it now and find someone new.

  • 1 decade ago

    i'd get as far away as possible, he killed a man, what stopping him from hurting others, or maybe you... besides he is going to be in prison for a long time, i'd testify against him

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