How do you toughen up a boy?

Grow a brain! This is 2007, not cave man days. His son should be allowed to develop his personalty as is, not as his father thinks it should be. Tell his father to see a therapist, and deal with his own issues, not live them through his son.

Toughening in always a matter of degree and has more to do with mental attitude than training.

If you want a list, how about:

(1) Start by communicating with the child from the earliest age. Never use baby-talk. Talk as if you were talking to an adult, just be cautious of your vocabulary.

(2) Do nothing to speed up any loss of innocence. Just be there as it happens. Instill in the child the concept of "You never have to do this alone."

(3) The child will tell you when it is appropriate to begin training on the topic of Good and Bad behavior. Make sure the he understands that behavior is a choice.

(4) When appropriate have the child discern instances of :Bad: behavior, both his own and of those around him.

(5) Never do or say anything to lower the child's self esteem. Find ways to alter behavior by positive means when possible. A little praise goes a long way and will be remembered.

(6) Include physical activity very early. Do not let the TV or video games become a habit.

(7) Find a local Dojo whose master is well balanced. Find out when you can enroll the boy. Take an active interest. This does not have to be Karate or martial arts, zazen training will work as well.

(8) Play with the child. Daily. Teach a good sense of humor and how bullying and poking fun at others is not Good behavior.

(9) Always remind the child that he is unique and that he is loved. Use Thought, Word and Deed.

(10) Teach the child to read when he is ready. Expose him to more than Mother Goose. Books are a good way to get across the idea that some people live very different lives than his. It is also the easiest way to teach the lesson about History.

This list will develop a person who is not easily offended or constantly being hurt, yet sensitive to the needs of others (by example). Think skin, marshmallow heart.

It also works with girls.

Self-confidence keeps a kid from getting picked on.

Self-confidence for a 5-month-old means that nobody is trying to toughen him up by making him cry it out or whatever, but that his parents (both of them!) and other caregivers immediately tend to his needs to teach him that his family will be there for him no matter up.

As he continues to grow up, he will naturally need and want more independence, so self-confidence comes from his parents telling him they believe he can do it and encouraging him to go for it. He may need extra coaching to master some skill (social, physical, intellectual) and the parents need to help him find that (as part of the whole, "your family has your back" thing that breeds self-confidence).

Avoiding affection, verbally belittling a boy for being "too nice" and stuff like that does NOT toughen a kid up. Only makes him confused and angry.

Hes 5 months old he will be who he will be if you start trying to toughen him up he could become to hard and you will have a nightmare child.

Too nice? What does he want him to grow up to be? How old is this boy that's supposed to be "tough"? I'm assuming he's still a toddler since that's the forum you posted this in. That's too young to worry about a boy not being "tough". And, what's wrong with being nice??????

You do not need to toughen up a child! That's what's wrong with the world today!!! I am hoping that you mean toughen up as far as crying from getting hurt etc....and not being mean to others!!! Off my soapbox...

He needs to raise his son to be nice. I'm not sure what he means by tough, but if he means agressive, bully, etc., he should forget it. Maybe he should play sports with him. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being nice.

5 months??? Just take good care of him and don't over-react to every little thing. When he starts crawling and walking and falls and hurts himself, tell him he is ok and don't run to pick him up all the time. (Obviously be sure he is actually OK.) Right now, he's just a baby!!!!

well, his son might feel bullied if he is forced to toughen up when he is a senistive person. I think he should just be himself.

get a grip