How do I know when a relationship is good for me?

You said it, "However, I seem to get caught up in the chemistry, and not look deeper into the relationship itself prior to jumping in head first. " Don't do this. Pay more attention at the subtle hints that we often overlook or choose to ignore that a relationship isn't working in all areas.

Chemistry is very important and is often the reason that you seek someone out. Now once you have their attention, take it slow.

Time will tell if it's only a connection because of chemistry or on all levels. You'll know and he'll relay the same if it's going to work out. Life doesn't make it easy for anyone so there's going to be letdowns so expect them but you live and learn. You have already demonstrated this by taking the precautionary steps BEFORE getting into another relationship.

Chemistry is always key. I suppose the second thing would be time, you need to have the time to spend with the person. You could also look at your financial position, if you expect to be devoting a good deal of time at work or if you are currently going through any major life altering changes.

I don't think there really is a tried and true way to see if entering a relationship is a good idea, you should just let it happen.

Perhpas you should just spend enough time (could be years) on your own so that you become independent and dont actually 'need' a full-time relationship....

Then you will know yourself and what you really want and why THAT is important to you (and important for a relationship).... for I believe that when you are confident with yourself and feel self-sufficient is when you will attract what is needed to 'complemet' you!

That chemistry stuff is dangerous but we are only human!

(PS the 'not allowing yourself to be in a relationship' should be a voluntary thing instead!)

I usually take things really slow if a guy is willing to take things slow till I'm more comfortable then thats always good..also if he supports you in everything and treats you like a queen that should be a good sign that he's really intrested and cares and he should be able to drop anything in a second for you..when I first met my guy we really took it slow and dated for a year before i was comfortable even being intimate and he waited and did sooo much for me he also is willing to drop what ever hes doing for me even if its dumping the guys to just stay at home with me..

You feel happy, protected, warm and secure. Thats how you know you are in a good relationship.

secure does not necessarily mean financial.