Installing Husband 1.0. . . ?

*Installing Husband 1.0*

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a

distinct slow down in overall system performance particularly in the

flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under

Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other

valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5,

and then installed undesirable programs such as Super 12 Version

5.0, Tri Nations 3.0, Limited Overs 7.2, and especially Golf Clubs

4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply

crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these

problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

Dear Desperate,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while

Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: "http:

I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't

forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as

designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications

Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, over use of the above

application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,

Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that

will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT

install Mother in law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background, that

will eventually seize control of all your system resources). Also, do

not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are

unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary,

Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and

cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying

additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend

Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,

Tech Support