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Alexis R asked in HealthWomen's Health · 1 decade ago

Getting pap done, is this weird??

I'm getting a pap smear done tomorrow. I'm totally doctor phobic and start freaking out and have panic attacks. I haven't had a pap done in over 3 years and my dr is telling me I need to get one done in order to get more BC pills. Is it weird to want my husband in the room with me?? I just feel so uncomfortable and freaked out being in a doctor's office, let alone having a man dr examine my crotch region!!! LOL!! I just told my husband that he has to come in with me. Has anyone else ever done this?? I don't want everyone to think I'm nuts, I just freak out about dr's. Plus, I've never had a male dr doing my pap smear, so it'll be even more uncomfortable for me.

Update:

WOW! I can't believe I had so many quick responses. Thanks everyone. I'm definately dragging hubby there with me. Plus, I told him my dr was a male and he kind of wanted to be there anyway to make sure nothing "funny" was going on. LOL!! He's gotta be my protector always. I love it. Ok, I'm glad that people don't think its weird to have him in the room with me.

32 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Girl- I am a complete dentist phobe, so I feel you!!! But I absolutely loved my OBGYN!!! I've had women in the past and have had really bad experiences. They've always seemed to be a little "rougher". I'm onto my second male doctor because my first moved out of town. They are very sweet and gentle. I bring my husband all the time. There is nothing strange about that and nothing weird about a Pap. It's really important to have them to make sure you're healthy. Maybe bring an iPod with you and make a play list of all your favorite songs. Tell the doctor about your phobia and I'm sure he won't mind. Have your husband stand by your head and hold your hand. Have him run his fingers in your hair and stare into those eyes that love you more than life. Breath deep and relax. It takes like 30 seconds to be swabbed. Plan a nice lunch or coffee date with your honey hubby afterwards so you have something to look forward to and to reward yourself with.

    Also, maybe do some research online to ease your nerves, or have some questions for him about birth control. If you haven't seen him in 3 years, there might be something better out there for you. Personally, I'm trying to get my period started again so we can get going on baby number 2, but my sister takes a BC called Yasmin and loves it. It has a dieuretic in it so you don't gain weight.

    Whatever you decide to do, you'll be fine and your husband will be there, he'd never let anything happen to you.

    Lot of love- B

  • 1 decade ago

    First of all the questions and fears you have are all valid.

    Wanting your husband in the room is normal, and if he is a competent and compassionate physician, he will not mind. Having your husband there will do a lot to help alleviate the fears you are having.

    When a physician does a pelvic, they usually allow you to undress and get on the table and place a drape over yourself. Sometimes, leaving your socks on may help you feel a bit better. . (strange but true. . ) When he comes in (the Doctor) usually he will chat with you and ask a few history questions before starting the exam. Most physicians are aware of the fact that women are not comfortable with the idea of a pelvic and will try to minimize your discomfort.

    The use of metal speculum is not as frequent today, (the tend to be cold and there have largely been replaced with disposable plastic ones. If a metal speculum is used, frequently the physician will touch your let with it first to let you know what is about to happen and to warm it a bit.

    The actual act of getting a pap, is the scraping of some cells from the cervix. Sometimes there is a little discomfort, but is not generally painful.

    Just let the physician know that you are not totally comfortable, and there are some things he can do to help make you comfortable. Most male docs, will always have a female nurse in the room to ease your fears, and ensure that there is no impropriety or inappropriate action on his part.

    Try not to worry too much, it is usually over in 10 minutes or less. There is some discomfort, but not much. Good luck. . you can do this!! Take a few deep breaths. . . you will be fine, although a little worse for the worry.

    Source(s): I've been an RN for 15 years, and had 3 children. . I know what you are going through!
  • 1 decade ago

    Oh its not a big deal, really. I was nervous the first time I ever had a male doctor, but I've had a quite a few Paps done now, and I've had two kids. It is slightly unnerving, yes, to have some man checking stuff out, but they have seen many vaginas in their line of work. My gynecologist is a male as well. The entire time I'm in the stirrups, there is also a female nurse in the room. I believe that is a law, because I also had a female doctor at one time, and another nurse was always in attendance. Its imperative that you do go ahead and get the pap done. You could have problems that if they went unchecked, could develop into something worse. Good luck, and don't stress out. It'll be ok.

  • DH
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with wanting your husband in the room with you!! I've done it before, not for a PAP, but for a colposcopy (a biopsy). My doctor, even though she was a female, tried to tell me that the room was too small for my husband to be in there with me, the bed, the doctor, and the tech. I told her if she didn't want him in there, I wouldn't be going in. Needless to say, I won, and it was more relaxing having him there, holding my hand.

    By law, when you have a male doctor, they are REQUIRED to have a female nurse, or assistant, in the room at the same time while doing the exam. This protects everyone involved, and helps to make you feel more comfortable. If you really don't want a male, feel free to ask for a female. He won't feel bad, trust me. Not a lot of woman enjoy a strange male, albeit, a doctor, checking them out "down there". You'll be just fine.

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  • 1 decade ago

    No it is not weired to want your husband in there with you, but what does your husband think of it? Why not get a female doctor. Maybe you would be just a little more comfortable. But you really should get a pap test every year. There is such a high rate of cancer out there that this is something you really need to do. Just think of it this way, there are a lot of women out there that go though the same thing and all of us are still alive to talk about it. And no I don't think there is a woman out there that has ever said, I can't wait to get my pap test. It is just something we have learned that we must do for our health. Good Luck!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    It shouldn't be a problem for your husband to accompany you as long as he doesn't get in the doctor's or nurse's way. He can stand up near your head somewhere, and hold your hand and maybe that will help you relax. I'm trying to figure out how you've managed to get BC for three years without a pap. Paps are extremely important and you need to get them once a year. Just try to remind yourself that they don't hurt at all, and they only take literally a minute. Before the pap try to breathe deep and slowly and this will help calm you down, too.

  • 1 decade ago

    No, the closest thing I've done to that is take a 20 minute bus ride to another clinic when I have one a 5 minute walk away because I had a lump in my breast and wanted a female doctor to give me the exam. It was a few weeks after my roommate had started creeping me out and making passes at me so it was making me pretty men-phobic.

    Fear of doctors isn't uncommon; I'd be surprised if you'd be the first patient your doctor has ever heard of who wanted her husband with her while she's being examined. If you explain your anxiety to the doc beforehand he will probably understand (and if not, who cares?).

  • 1 decade ago

    It is an akward situation, but very beneficial because you could have a disease or something that you may not even know about. But let your physician know that you are susceptible to panic attacks and feel very uncomfortable when in the presence of a doctor or when a doctor examines you. Plus I am sure that if it's okay with you the physician will let your husband in the room to make you feel much better.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    No I dont think its weird lol I remember my first Pap smear lol I thought I was going into the docter form my normal check up and get a refill on my birth control prescription and i got in there and much too my suprise there were these weird tool on the table and I had brought my friend with me cause we were going shopping afterwards. I was so scared I would let my friend leave she stood at my head and it was kinda weird but I felt more comfortable with her there. If any thing thats is a little weird

  • 1 decade ago

    I had my husband with me for paps before... but if it is a male doctor, by law, they have to have another female in the room. Its not that bad and it takes about 1 minute to do...

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